lazaefair
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Summary
Billy discovers he’s run out of heat tea on the second day of being snowed into the abandoned sod house he and Goody took shelter in. It’s the ninety-third day since Goody poured him a glass of whiskey in a Texas saloon and tore up Billy’s warrant in front of him.
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"Feels good," Nile says in reply to Nicky's question, "feels really fucking good," the words punched out of her in short gasps as she rises and falls in Joe's lap, sliding wet and luscious around his cock.
Prompt: blindfolds
Series
- Part 1 of KinkTOGber 2021
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This Story Is An Excuse To Picture Yusuf al-Kaysani In The Slave Leia Outfit by lazaefair for badwolfbadwolf
Fandoms: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
28 Jul 2021
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At least Nicky isn’t frozen in eternal carbonite agony anymore. But he’s blind, and weak, and still imprisoned, Andy along with him. Booker and Copley can’t break their covers. And Joe is...well. He grimaces, looking down at the expensive but tacky gold belt and purple silk flimsily covering his groin. Truly, neither money nor power can buy good taste.
Star Wars Original Trilogy fusion. I regret nothing.
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This is dumb. This is so dumb. "Let me go," he tries, but delivery guy's smile grows a little more, because of course he's noticed what's happening between Joe's legs, because fuck Joe's life. He rakes his gaze down Joe's body again, almost as good as a touch, and Joe can't hide the shiver that rips through him at that either.
Written for this Bottom Joe kinkmeme prompt: "Straight out of a porno. Joe sleeps naked and gets woken up by the deliveryman early one morning. Nicky can't believe his eyes. All that lovely skin! And Joe's all ass out, dick out, hole empty. Nicky better do something about that."
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Dinglehoppers by iwritesometimes, lazaefair, Poemsingreenink
Fandoms: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
22 May 2021
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He doesn’t tell Yusuf the truth about their bloody first meeting until years later. It’s too goddamn embarrassing, to be perfectly honest.
Yusuf's a prince. Nicolò's a mermaid. They fall in love. Not!fic style.
Recent series
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- Words:
- 489
- Works:
- 1
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Coffee for Fresh Eyes by lazaefair
Fandom: Night at the Museum (2006 2009), Night at the Museum (2006)
31 Mar 2015
Summary
It's Night At The Museum. It's Larry/Ahkmenrah. The two main features are: coffee dates and Larry taking lessons in badassedness from Ahkmenrah.
- Words:
- 12,457
- Works:
- 7
- Bookmarks:
- 137
Recent bookmarks
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Haddock makes virgin Tintin come three or four times in one night. Based on a prompt from the old kink meme.
Bookmarked by lazaefair
14 Jan 2022
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In which Joe is coordinating a holiday party over the phone with a guy named Nicky who keeps praising Joe just a little too much for Joe to be casual about about it. Thankfully, the nice HR guy called Nicolò Joe emails sometimes says it’s okay to date coworkers.Joe debates the relative merits of making a fuss and decides ultimately that his best bet is to just make sure it’s a party he himself enjoys and, ideally, Merrick doesn’t.
Finally, when he realizes his lunch break is twenty-five minutes away and he’s wasted enough time thinking about this that he doesn’t want to actually start working on something real in what little remains of his morning, he picks up his work phone and dials the number Merrick dropped on his desk.
On the second ring, a deep, pleasant voice answers, “Hello, this is Nicky speaking?”
“Hi Nicky,” Joe says, twirling the phone cable around his finger. “I’m Joe. I’m supposed to help coordinate the holiday party with you?”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,066
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 37
- Kudos:
- 394
- Bookmarks:
- 48
- Hits:
- 1684
Bookmarked by lazaefair
13 Jan 2022
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When Tintin doesn't know about something, he makes it his business to find out. In this case, how to seduce a rather reluctant Captain.
Bookmarked by lazaefair
11 Jan 2022
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Seasons of Gawain by Temve
Fandom: Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, The Green Knight (2021)
24 Dec 2021
- Words:
- 1,791
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 3
Bookmarked by lazaefair
29 Dec 2021
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someday when the lights are low by liadan14 for theoxfordcommando
Fandoms: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
12 Dec 2021
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Summary
Torchwood AU in which Joe is dosed with alien sex dust. (No familiarity with Torchwood necessary to read this, although it probably helps.)His skin feels like it’s burning where Nicky’s hand is on it.
“Let me help you,” Nicky says softly.
In his chest, Joe’s heart pounds.
Fuck, what’s he going to put in his notes for this shit? Symptoms: Normally endurable attraction to co-worker has become excruciating?
Bookmarked by lazaefair
13 Dec 2021