dontpaytheboatman



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Over winter at Kaer Morhen with Ciri, Geralt realizes that he loves Jaskier, and has for years. Everyone at the keep decides the only logical thing that can happen is that Geralt court and wed Jaskier. But Geralt wants to do it properly. So the strongest, most fearsome warriors in all the land, research how to woo a minor noble and send Geralt back into the world with elaborate lists and a game plan.

    And it all is going great. Courting turns out to be a lot easier than he expected. He and Jaskier will be married well before the return to Kaer Morhen for the winter!

    Jaskier is thrilled to have his best friend back, and be off adventuring again. Geralt is behaving a bit oddly, but well, people get weird sometimes.

    A fic where Jaskier is the romantically clueless one. Just because he sings about love, doesn't mean he'll see it - even when it is Witcher sized and holding flowers right in his face.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,262
    Chapters:
    16/16
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    2
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    3414
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    03 Aug 2020

  2. Public Bookmark 84

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    The snow is thick on the ground when the Goddess appears in his kitchen, taller than usual and holding an axe.

    George eyes the axe warily. “What’s all this about?” 

    “She has deviated from the plan,” the Goddess tells George, voice tight. 

    “Your plan had some holes to begin with,” remarks George. 

    -

    The best-laid plans of gods and men often go sideways. George/Alanna feat. interfering deities.

    Language:
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    Words:
    10,117
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    57
    Kudos:
    259
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    84
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    15 Jul 2020

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    He had seen it, before he was exiled to the Black Gate. Gondor had been crumbling, slowly, under the weight of history and loss and corruption. The return of the King had been a symbol of hope, a pretty tale to cheer the populace. There were none of the bloodline left.

    And yet there was the King’s banner in the middle of the battle at the Black Gate.

    Language:
    English
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    8,763
    Chapters:
    4/4
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    69
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    548
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    03 Jun 2020

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    Apostate, abomination, murderer. He was the last person Andraste would have chosen as her Herald. But here he was closing rifts with a mark on his hand, the wrong man for the job, but the only one who could do it. The Maker must have a wicked sense of humor.

    Note: This story explores several possible love interests. I've listed all the possibilities that are explored, but even I wasn't sure what the actual pairings would be by the end until I finally got to the end.

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    Language:
    English
    Words:
    155,091
    Chapters:
    70/70
    Comments:
    315
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    477
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    143
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    22 Mar 2020

  5. Public Bookmark 34

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    Alistair is not married to the woman he loves. He is very unhappy about this, and has plans to change it. If he can ever work up the nerve.

    Tabris does not like weddings. She'd had one. She hadn't liked it. The very thought of having another one makes her skin crawl. But dammit, if Alistair wants a wedding, he'll get a damn wedding. A small, quiet wedding.

    Leliana can abide many things. But a small wedding for the Hero of Ferelden and the almost-king of Ferelden is assuredly not one of them, and she'll commit any number of atrocities to prevent it.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,204
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Comments:
    116
    Kudos:
    187
    Bookmarks:
    34
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    05 Mar 2020