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  1. Public Bookmark 4

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    Summary

    Ron Weasley is ready to finally fulfil the biggest fantasies of every young man on the planet. Hermione Granger has read enough out of books, and wants to see what the fuss is all about for herself. They’re both ready to take the next step in their physical relationship. But not like this – no, this wasn’t what they had thought it would be like at all...

    Written for 2022 Romione Trope Fest, this is my dark take on “Fuck Or Die”, a trope which I have always had reservations about. Slight AU, and slightly different characterisations than what I really imagine, and thus not set in the same fanon universe as my other works. Happy ending, I promise.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,213
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    319

    28 Jun 2022

  2. Public Bookmark 7

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    Forced into a competition that pits muggleborns and purebloods against each other, Ron and Hermione encounter an unexpected obstacle in the arena.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,342
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    391

    28 Jun 2022

  3. Public Bookmark 45

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    A poisonous berry. A preposterous cure.

    A decidedly unscientific result.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    “No, no wait,” Hermione said suddenly, jumping to her feet. “No, forget it. I can't - ” She'd rather die. That was all there was to it.

    “Miss Granger, sit down!” McGonagall barked and Hermione immediately dropped back into her chair.

    “As I was saying,” McGonagall went on, “the only cure is copulation with a pureblood wizard.”

    “What?” Ron said, frowning.

    “Copulation, Mister Weasley,” said McGonagall patiently. “Intercourse.”

    “So...” Ron said, looking between Hermione and McGonagall, “so... we have to... shag?”

    Hermione buried her face in her hands, wishing for all the world that she knew a spell that would open up a giant pit in the earth that would swallow her whole.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,439
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    241
    Bookmarks:
    45
    Hits:
    5571

    28 Jun 2022

  4. Public Bookmark 36

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    Summary

    There was nothing all that exciting about hunting horcruxes

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,647
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    183
    Bookmarks:
    36
    Hits:
    6535

    28 Jun 2022

  5. Public Bookmark 22

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    Ron doesn't know what to do. Percy and Audrey are getting married, and kindly request that all bridal party members attend ballroom dancing lessons for an elaborate number following the first dance. As if that's not bad enough, they're requiring everyone to have a date to dance with. Good thing he's got a best friend who would do anything for him, which includes posing as his date to appease the bride and groom.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    49,452
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    252
    Kudos:
    145
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    4625

    15 Jun 2022

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