- Merlin (TV) (10)
Lancelot was about to give his beautiful life away, for theirs, and Merlin had to think of a way to stop him.
Of all the times he could have been sent back to, the gods had, for some reason, decided to send him back in the midst of the Dorochas’ whispers and hisses, mere instants after having been run through by one himself, and days away from the terrible death that would follow. He was being tossed into this past in a similar state to the one he’d been in after Lancelot had walked through that twisted veil: cold, unbearably cold, in a way that no touch could possibly hope to appease. And yet Lancelot was here, alive and healthy, and there was all the difference.
In which Merlin wakes to find that he has been sent back in time, to the moment after he was struck by the Dorocha, days away from Lancelot's death.
Fifteen hundred years after Camlann, Arthur returns and Merlin is there to welcome him. Merlin has no idea why he's back, no idea if it's pure chance, or destiny, or something even greater -
All he knows is that the one thing he has spent fifteen hundred years waiting for is finally happening... and he can't do this.
“Years ago, you insisted on seeing the good in me before anyone else saw it -- insisted on seeing the good in me before even I, myself, saw it. And now--
-- Now, Merlin, you won’t even look me in the eye. So, please, I am begging you. Tell me, Merlin. Tell me what’s changed.”
“I’ve gone soft over the days, you know. A few months ago, I would have killed you where you stood.”
“A few months ago, you did try to kill me where I stood,” Merlin reminded her, and she could hear the smirk in his tone.
“Oh, don’t be such a spoilsport. You did, too.”
“Well. A few months ago, we were in Camlann, not locked together in that cell, doomed to perish together.”
“Circumstances,” Morgana decided, crossing her arms over her chest. “That’s all it is.”
“Sure.” He was smiling again - she just knew it.
A bit uncertainly, she asked, “Was it circumstance that pitted us against each other, too?”
She heard him release a breath, then say, “I hope. Gods, I hope it.”
A few days after Camlann, Merlin and Morgana find themselves imprisoned in the same place, and forced to spend their days together.
Basically, this is just a pretext for non-stop Merlin/Morgana interaction once the Emrys reveal has been made.
And yes, at times, she wishes that for one person, for at least one person, she might be enough. Enough to have them be alright, with her. Feel good. Feel her love, and have that be enough. Yes, she wishes.
And maybe that’s her problem, in the end.
Because, see, here’s the thing.
Gwen loves. Perhaps too much for her own good; too much for anyone’s own good, in fact.
Gwen has always felt things very acutely, always loved people very deeply, and all her life, she's heard people say that caring 'too much' was a weakness, that it's something most people shouldn't bother to do.
But then she begins to realise that maybe that's not entirely true.
"That is how you deal with your problems! By politely stating your aim and waiting for your turn to come, instead of coming here with your weapons and no word of warning! D’you reckon it’s easy for me? Not only do I have to deal with the mess he,“ Merlin pointed at Arthur with his chin, “leaves behind him, but now I also have to deal with unplanned assassinations? This world has become a crazy place, isn’t that right, Gwaine?”
Arthur's assassins seriously lack style, and Merlin tells them as much. The knights are stunned. So are the assassins. Also, Merlin's mad at Arthur, and so he is determined to ruin his day as much as possible. In the meanwhile, Gwaine's just living his best life (isn't he always?).