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  1. Words:
    85,385
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    22

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  1. Public Bookmark 24

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    Summary

    So, another crack!fic of comedy porn was demanded for the “Throat-Spackling Twunts and Other Nonsense” collection (& discord server), On one of the NSFW Good Omens facebook groups, a post was shared which went:

    “Do ya pu$$y ever randomly get wet and you’re just like ???? what is it girl??? What do you see???”

    The comment was “I saw this and it made me think about if Aziraphale decided to have a vulva but didn’t really think too much about how they work and he just gets wet when he sees Crowley and either (a) freaks the fuck out or (b) asks Crowley what the deal is and Crowley chokes on air, and now I’m just giggling like a nut.”

    So I was dared to write a crack version.
    This is absolutely not meant to be taken seriously. Somehow the “Not on the plants, dear, we’re British” fic led to this nonsense. I’m not even sorry any more, I’m going to hell anyway. See you filthy buggers down there. *Raises glass*.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,943
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    59
    Kudos:
    192
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    1046

    18 Jan 2020

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    Bookmarker's Notes

    Hilarious take on az having a vulva smut

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “I’m sorry,” Jaskier says, “but I must have misheard you. ‘Three times’? Geralt, you’re not a man. You’re a-”

    “Shut up,” Geralt says. “I shouldn’t have told you.”

    “The worst thing of all,” Jaskier says, either having gone deaf or choosing to ignore Geralt completely, “is that you’ve never really tried. That this is total hearsay. Gods, it could be more than three. You could go all night.”

    “If you keep on,” Geralt says, “You’ll never find out."

    (or: Geralt has a lot of stamina, and Jaskier is keen to investigate.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,681
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    105
    Kudos:
    1655
    Bookmarks:
    200
    Hits:
    12366

    15 Jan 2020

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    Bookmarker's Notes

    hot witcher smut

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "This is a bad idea," says Geralt.

    "Terrible idea," Jaskier agrees. He kisses up Geralt’s neck, his tongue wicked on Geralt’s ear. "Really bad."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,062
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    95
    Kudos:
    1630
    Bookmarks:
    272
    Hits:
    9530

    14 Jan 2020

    Bookmarker's Collections:
    Bookmarker's Notes

    hot witcher smut

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    They're just two humans working in a big corporate office in downtown London. //

    Crowley is a hard working designer and marketer at an international conglomerate with clients all over the world. It's a great job on paper, but he's unappreciated and it's really time to move on. Still, he needs this job, and after getting a little too drunkenly candid with his new boss at a company party, he's pretty sure he's about to be fired.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,827
    Chapters:
    13/20
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    1019
    Kudos:
    1696
    Bookmarks:
    365
    Hits:
    24613

    11 Jan 2020

    Bookmarker's Collections:
    Bookmarker's Notes

    BDSM office porn AU Bottom Crowley Top Az

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Far from any city, near the Scottish coast, Tadfield College has a celebrated history, an unrivaled academic reputation, and two departments at war. When the Biology and English departments are forced to share a building, Senior Lecturer and botanist Anthony Crowley finds himself drawn into the orbit of the polite but strange English professor, Dr. Aziraphale Fell. As the new term begins, two academics navigate the politics of both their offices and academia, and try to solve the puzzle of one another.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    70,595
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    476
    Kudos:
    799
    Bookmarks:
    193
    Hits:
    7546

    10 Jan 2020

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