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02 Nov 2019
Deep down, Pei Ming always knew the day he would stumble upon one of his many mistakes waiting for him on his doorstep would come.
"LING WEN! SHI WUDU" He yelled as he stormed back inside their flat, holding the baby at arm's length like a hot potato. "WHAT DO I DO?"
"Build a time travel machine and cut off your past self's dick before you can impregnate this snot and shit factory's mother," Ling Wen suggested, casually sipping on her seventh's cup of coffee of the morning.
"Throw him in the trash bin and pretend you can't hear him screaming," Shi Wudu snorted. "Don't get caught though. I'm not bailing you out of jail again."
"You two are awful human beings," Pei Ming said like this was astonishing news to him.
Or: someone thought it was a good idea to abandon a baby by Pei Ming's doorstep. It was not.