This is 2 many tags im so sorry
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You'll often catch yourself acting overly cautious around both John and his dad, trying to stay as far away from upsetting either of them as is possible. It sucks ass because rationally you know that neither of them would even think of hurting you, rationally you know that you shouldn't feel on edge enough to flinch when John's hand so much as waves in your direction, rationally you know that you shouldn't feel terrible about every little thing John teases you about. But habits are hard to break, and in the moment, it's hard to stop yourself from clinging to what you know works. John is probably worried about you at this point, you're well aware of that, but there isn't really anything you can do about it.
- Part 2 of Porcelain and Parchment