They Are Idiots
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Summary
There are some moments when you need to think fast.
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The Faulty Deletion, or "In Which Mycroft's Apology is 14 Years Overdue" by thefloatingpoem
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV)
10 Sep 2014
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Sherlock has retired to Sussex, alone. He feels his mental acuity and intensity slowly slipping away. He is melancholy, but content, pottering about his garden, keeping his bees, playing his violin. It has been fourteen years since John and Sherlock parted, fourteen years since Mycroft gave each of them some bad advice, fourteen years since John decided to try at a normal life, fourteen years since Sherlock deleted the most important deduction of his life. Sherlock tries not to think of John, who has married a normal person this time and should be living quite happily in the suburbs with two kids, a golden retriever, and a picket fence. As it turns out, John is not living quite happily in the suburbs. And Mycroft owes them both an apology.
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Albus and Scorpius are in love with each other, and as the title says, everyone else knows. Except them.
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Seelenverwandt by unicornglittercake
Fandoms: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
20 Aug 2017
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It's a soulmate AU with my own twist.
Hux is 25 and has given up on finding his soulmate.
Kylo is haunted by his in his dreams.In life you never meet people without a reason, they're either a blessing or a lesson...
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Take Me to New York, Take Me to Heaven by thearchangelofsass
Fandoms: Voltron: Legendary Defender
25 Dec 2016
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my gift for Arisa as part of the voltron secret santa gift exchange
Lance and Keith have been pining after each other for as long as Hunk and Pidge can remember, but are they doing anything about it? No. But when a fateful day and rainstorm force them to confront their feelings, will they end up happy after all? The answer will shock you.
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Albany is professional to a fault.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 304
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 2
- Hits:
- 19
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Jake Peralta and Amy Santiago are a Classic™ example of a theater rivalry– competing for roles as long as they can remember, striving to be Holt's favorite student actor (his favorite is Gina, but no one needs to know that).
The dynamics of Jake and Amy's rivalry start to twist when they enter high school, getting cast as romantic leads year after year. They begrudgingly put up with this— until senior year rolls around and they find out that they have to kiss on stage.
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Ever heard the phrase: The road to hell is paved with good intentions?
Alya wants her ships to sail.
Nino wants a break.
Gabriel wants to help his son.
Plagg wants to have fun.
Tikki is not helping.
Neither Marinette's parents.Everyone wants the best for them. (Except maybe Plagg) At least they think so...
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The heating goes out in the flat on a cold day and Sherlock and John have to stay warm.
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There, in the darkness of the deep blue sea, lies a creature that lurks in the water and that hunts for another prey.
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Baz realizes something, about him, about Simon and that he hates truth or dare (or does he?)....
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Dazai is an asshole, waiting so long to nullify Corruption. Does he even know how Chuuya feels?
//The title and summary are so bad, but I don't know how to describe that mess I wrote sorry//
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Castiel is an omega who has been pretending to be a beta. When he is forced to go off his suppressants, he goes into heat on his way home from work. Pursued by alphas who want to rape him, he calls his alpha roommate Dean to rescue him. Dean doesn't know he is an omega and Cas thinks Dean doesn't like omegas. Will the alpha rescue him or leave him?
Or the one in which
Castiel becomes part of a new pack that might just have to protect him to the death.
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Jungkook is a college student who consistently makes terrible decisions when he's drunk that somehow always end with him getting hurt.
Jimin is a doctor that always seems to be stuck with the emergency room shift when a cute accident-prone college student shows up.: A romantic comedy.
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- Part 1 of The Share-House
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The Winter Soldier was in Tony’s lap, purring and headbutting the man as if the murderous thing was a giant, snuggling cat instead of a murderer and security threat.
It made Bucky’s blood boil seeing the man like that, already succeeding in getting Tony to sneak a hand into the long brown hair to scratch him behind his ears.
The genius had his STARKpad in the other hand and was reading the newspapers, discarding his coffee- His godforsaken coffee!- to pet the former assassin. Winter, or Snowflake as Tony called the soldier, purred happy and closed his eyes, his back open and vulnerable to Natasha who watched it all with silent curiosity. -
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Ned is the only one that knows how things should work
MJ and Peter are completely clueless about the situation they put themselves in
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- Part 2 of Things That Happen During the Summer
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Jimin taught him how to weave a flower crown while Yoongi taught him how to identify different kind of fruits and whether the red mushroom was poisonous. As they trailed the path back to the ground, Yoongi occasionally stopped by to pick a small bloodroot and tuck it on Jimin’s ear.
“Pretty.”
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Ava gets dragged to her high school reunion -mostly- against her will but the night turns out to be better than she expected.
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Garou needs a date. Badd is conveniently there. We all know how this goes.
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Oh I'm a mess right now by RighteousBlonde (AlasOpheliaDrowned)
Fandoms: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
13 Jul 2019
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Alec was fucked. Well and truly fucked. And not in the fun way.
Alec was a shadowhunter, a trained warrior, a leader. He had stared down demons twice his size and walked away without a scratch on him. He might not have been the strongest shadowhunter (Jace) or the smartest (Izzy) but he was damn good at his job. He knew how to deal with danger in any form. What he did not know what to deal with was this. This being a cute mundane boy. A cute mundane boy who was currently looking up at him from under his lashes and asking if he could buy him a coffee.
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Alec and Magnus meet in a cafe and fall in love, but due to lack of communication and Alec's turtlenecks neither of them realize the other is a part of the shadow world. This leads to a very large, but well intentioned mess.Basically the boys are hopeless and Izzy is the only reason the shadow world hasn't completely fallen apart.
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Double Take by toyoto031999
Fandoms: รักโคตรร้ายสุดท้ายโคตรรัก | KinnPorsche: The Series (TV)
22 Oct 2022
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Kinn and Porsche belong together. Pete knows it. Khun knows it. Vegas is aware as well. Now, if only someone could tell the two idiots.
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The fire nation ministers hire a matchmaker to find Zuko a girlfriend.
Sokka, it turns out, has many MANY opinions about this.
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Merlin, to his horror, discovers that maybe he and Arthur act like a married couple after all.
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It Was We Who Were The Cliché (But We Carried On Anyway) by orphan_account
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
26 Nov 2012
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When the reconciled Black sisters go on holiday together, Andromeda entrusts Draco, rather than Harry, with five year old Teddy Lupin for three weeks. Harry is convinced she made the wrong choice, and he decides the way to fix this is simply to keep turning up at the manor and refusing to leave Draco alone.
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Dean knew better. Of course he did. But Cas seemed so charmed by the antique-filled bed and breakfast that Dean went along with it when the proprietor mistook them for a couple. Telling himself it gave them a strategic advantage to be so close to the crime scene, he agreed to the weekend special she offered them. When the case ended up being a bust, they stuck around anyhow because hey, the second night was free…
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The Curse Of Black Moon Forest by Dacia for Ribbon_nyao
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
05 Mar 2022
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“The dead forest? The one with a notice outside that says Do Not Enter?”
Childe: “… yes.”
Zhongli: “…”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 164,879
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 313
- Kudos:
- 597
- Bookmarks:
- 119
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- 16360
Bookmarked by serinu
24 May 2022
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amazing zhongli and childe interaction; also loved all the liyue cast and the adepti
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of all your sacred vows by notmadderred
Fandoms: Moon Knight (TV 2022), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
10 Jul 2022
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By trade, Tony Stark isn’t a very gullible person, but even he will admit to feeling duped when he finds out that deities apparently walk the Earth and can exist undetected by any current scientific metric.
Or:
Various Avengers meet Moon Knight. The guy's pretty weird.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,982
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 335
- Kudos:
- 3262
- Bookmarks:
- 524
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- 29143
Bookmarked by dumbdumvv
23 May 2022
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GOD IT WAS SO GOOD JUST. THEM THEY R SO FUNNY AND SPIDEY JUST BEING AMAZING AND FUCKIN CLINT JUST. MWAH ADORED IT TYSM 4 SHARING IT HOLY FJCKKKK
excerpt of my messages to my friend that recced me this fic.
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Questions That Are Easy To ‘Pop’ by STARSdidathing
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Thor (Movies)
03 Sep 2016
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Five times Loki and Tony proposed to each other without meaning it. And the one time that they did.
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A Night At Blackbeards's Bar and Grill by soft_october
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
22 Mar 2022
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“Look - I don’t usually do this, but I am the food critic for The Anchor, and it’s imperative that I -”
“Oh, a food critic! Well that changes things.”
“Does it?”
“Sure. What was that name again?”
“Stede Bonnet. Food Critic, Stede Bonnet.”
“Right. Well, fuck off, Food Critic Stede Bonnet. Blackbeard’s Bar and Grill is all booked up.”The manager at the new restaurant Stede is trying to review is being kind of a dick. A certain member of the waitstaff, however, takes a bit of a liking to him.
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Look, Ed’s seen plenty of mirages before.
Oh, sure, he’s been strung out on sun and rum loads of times, his perpetually underhydrated tongue too heavy in his own mouth to be real. He’s seen the fizzling edges of so much might-actually-be-there-this-time freaky shit. Woulda offered up his own heart to any number of phantom mermaids hoping to dash him up against their big, scary rocks. Even addled past all reason, though, Ed knows the trick behind gambling away his own heart.
He doesn’t have one. So, what had there ever been to lose?
The point is: Ed knows when something looks like it’s there, but isn’t really there. He knows when someone seems to be dripping blood and saltwater on the ship’s floor right in front of him, but then again, it couldn’t be. Nothing (no one) is to be trusted, let alone his own senses.
Still, he’s gotta hand it to this particular illusion. It’s captured Stede down to every last wisp of golden hair.
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When fiercely private Lena Luthor is threatened with deportation, she announces that she and her PA, Kara Danvers, are engaged to be married. She'll get her visa, Kara will get a raise, job done. The only problem is, she forgot to ask Kara.
The Proposal AU :)
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“Welcome to Hotel de Lapis.”
Zhongli clicks his tongue. “Xiao, surely you can sound more enthusiastic than that.”
“Surely you can pay me more...or at all,” Xiao says sullenly, “But here we are.”
At the receptionist desk, Tartaglia breaks into a loud guffaw.
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(Zhongli is the owner of a hotel for spirits, where he has to fulfil the wishes of his guests before the final petal of each spirit's flower falls and they step through the final door to the afterlife.)
Series
- Part 1 of Hotel de Lapis
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Summary
a british exchange student meets a skaterboy who incontrovertibly hates him.
it doesn't help that he finds himself with an anonymous penpal with the name "dream," the same day.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 47,994
- Chapters:
- 22/22
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 792
- Kudos:
- 2710
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- 577
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- 55013
Bookmarked by seven7seven
28 Dec 2021
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dude i just love reading cliche plot and classic dnf dynamic. its so sickeningly familiar and makes me happy honestly.
cool fic. worths a read for sure
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For All You Young Hockey Players Out There, Pay Attention by thursdaysfallenangel
Fandoms: Supernatural
23 Jul 2022
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Summary
Dean Winchester knows two things about hockey, two things his dad made sure he knew. One, hockey is a guy’s sport, and two, hockey is family. Hockey meant Sam and Bobby and Benny and Victor and Gabriel and hell, his entire team. So when Victor gets traded, Russian-star-turned-new-teammate Castiel Krushnic becomes a threat. As much as Dean hates him for that, the longer he sticks around, the more he begins to threaten that first rule too. Dean’s been taught his whole life that those who play hockey should not be captivated by deep accented voices and the way a guy handles his stick, so how the hell is he supposed to justify what he’s starting to think about Cas? All Dean wanted at the beginning of the season was to win, and now all he wants to do is figure out how he feels about Cas and how to deal with it without ruining his career and tearing his family apart.
Series
- Part 1 of Pay Attention Universe
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 146,526
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 717
- Kudos:
- 4815
- Bookmarks:
- 1798
- Hits:
- 92402
Bookmarked by aosxcas
20 Nov 2021
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THIS. CAS KRUSHNIC MY BELOVED.
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Oikawa Tooru is attractive, charming, and irresistible.
He thinks so, anyway, until he meets the mall's new security guard.
In which Oikawa has a crush, Iwaizumi has no interest, and a chain of shoplifting incidents brings them together.
Series
- Part 2 of Shopping Mall Shenanigans
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,658
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 249
- Kudos:
- 1929
- Bookmarks:
- 286
- Hits:
- 18314
Bookmarked by Alicorn3074
19 Oct 2021
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this au is so fun i freaking love it
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When Our Day Comes by thepartyresponsible
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
27 May 2018
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“Damn, Rogers,” Tony says, “did Lady Liberty teach you to kiss like that?"
Steve blinks at him. He’s always been distracting. He has always been the kind of beautiful that can break necks when he walks into a room. But this close, the view is downright devastating. Tony’s eyes drop to Steve’s mouth, red and wet, and he almost forgets how breathing works.
“Well,” Steve says, after a beat, “she is French.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,613
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 248
- Kudos:
- 3803
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- 836
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- 28705
Bookmarked by DriverWithRush
15 Oct 2021
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Bookmarker's Notes
"I’d love to,” he says. “Steve, c’mon. You’re Steve Rogers. I let you pick me up in a biker bar and take me to a Motel 6. I’ll go to any damn art exhibit you want.”
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It’s dangerously late at night— George is scared he might say something he regrets while he’s under the safe cover of the moon and the stars and all he can hear is the low drawl of Dream’s voice, the way his accent curls around his words, George’s name.
It’s at times like these that George can’t help but wonder about who’s on the other side of the call. It’s so private like this, just the two of them, and George just wants to see, wants to 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸.
(Or: George just wants to see his best friend's face.)
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Derek looks at him like he’s a complete idiot.
“You’re a complete idiot,” Derek growls.
Good to know Stiles is still well versed in deciphering Derek’s facial expressions.
“Don’t talk to me like that. You don’t get to just act like Mr Alpha badass whenever it suits you, controlling me like I’m sixteen again. I can do what I like, see who I like, fuck whoever...” and Stiles doesn’t get to finish that sentence because he’s being shoved back into the door.
His head bangs softly against it and Derek is far too close to him. Stiles can feel his breath on his face.
Stiles licks his lips nervously and the way Derek’s eyes follow the movement makes him feel exposed. Stiles shudders.
He pokes Derek in the chest.
“Bad wolf. Der, I need... I need some space to get... to get over... just to find where I fit, now I’m back here for good,” Stiles says.
“I know where you goddamn fit,” Derek growls.
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and I press you to the pages of my heart by Voulezvous_79
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
23 Mar 2021
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Izuku squirms and laughs as Shinsou kisses at his neck, and Shinsou mumbles out, “You know, we should get divorced. That way I can marry you all over again.”
Shinsou can feel the eyeroll Izuku is giving him, but his voice is fondly exasperated as he says, “You are not divorcing me. Costs way too much money.”
Series
- Part 2 of all this and heaven too
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It wasn’t even the worst of Jaskier’s habits, but. It was the one that Geralt could perhaps do something about.
(Of course, he’d noticed Jaskier’s lingering attention, his fluttering pulse when Geralt stood near. He’d noticed the heated glances he shot Geralt when he thought he wasn’t watching, and his nervous restlessness when they were forced to share an inn bed.)
If Jaskier simply needed a warm body to vent his frustrations upon, well. It might as well be Geralt’s.