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  1. Tags
    Summary

    While on Nar Shaddaa looking for work, bounty hunter Geralt and his little ward Ciri meet Jaskier, a talented Twi'lek singer. Geralt feels Jaskier is hiding something important, but at the same time feels drawn to him.

    "What about you, then? What are you doing in a place like this?"
    Jaskier once again showed him his charming smile. There was a hint of mischief in his eyes.
    "Me? I entertain the scum and villainy."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,940
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    22
    Hits:
    110
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt is a park ranger with a murderous resting face and an inexplicable hatred of world-famous popstar Jaskier.

    OR

    5k of absolutely-clueless-outsider POV, now with bonus features!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,848
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    198
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    899
  3. Tags
    Summary

    As he waits among the bustling crowd, awful what-ifs keep replaying in his head: what if Geralt has, in fact, changed his mind? What if Jaskier only dreamed the fondness? What if Geralt leaves him after he discovers all Jaskier’s flaws? What if –

    Dad!” Ciri shouts at the top of her lungs.

    Jaskier winces at the deafening shriek (Cirilla has quite a set of lungs). When he looks up, he... oh.

    In which Jaskier sees Geralt for the first time after many months of Geralt's final deployment. It breaks his brain and dooms his heart. (Not that it isn't doomed anyway).

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,596
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    311
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    1333
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier flipped through the papers, scanning the resumes of the applicants as he went. Hiring a bodyguard had turned out to be tedious, but if last month's incident had proved anything it was that he really needed one. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for in his applicants, but he figured he’d know it when he saw it.

    When he got to the final resume in the pile, he did a double take.

    Name: Geralt Rivia

    No, Jaskier thought, it can’t be.

    ***

    After the mountain, Jaskier returns to the sea for a few centuries. When he emerges, the world is certainly different, but not all of that’s a bad thing. He begins his musical career once again, but just when it’s starting to take off he’s attacked by a fan. He needs a bodyguard.

    He certainly wasn’t expecting Geralt of all people to apply for the job.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,843
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    133
    Kudos:
    1174
    Bookmarks:
    178
    Hits:
    10714
  5. Tags
    Summary

    “She didn’t tell you?”
    “Tell me what?!”
    “Oh.. oh this is kind of awkward now… see, after our conversation last night, I decided that you were right. I may have written about an idealized version of country life. And there is only one way to improve for my next album! I must learn the real way! And that is where you come in!”
    Jaskier stood there, arms extended and grinning brilliantly.
    “Oh. No. No I can’t–”
    “Do not fret! You won’t even know I am here! I’ll just follow you around everywhere and make sure I get the complete experience so that my next album will be an absolute banger! Now, where is your spare-bedroom?”

    Western AU: Jaskier decides to move in with his cowboy crush to learn all about the real cowboy life. Only for research reasons, naturally.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,791
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    54
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    738
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier is a famous singer who has lost his muse, Geralt is a renowned dancer who may just become Jaskier's new muse.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,259
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    44
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    274
  7. Tags
    Summary

    In which Geralt is a freelance mercenary, and Jaskier is an up and coming singer. Jaskier annoys the wrong people, and Geralt is hired to kill him.

    And in addition to absolutely no one's request, a coffee shop au!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    129,742
    Chapters:
    25/?
    Comments:
    95
    Kudos:
    177
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    4253
  8. Tags
    Summary

    It’s a bit pathetic and desperate, Jaskier can freely admit, but he has no other choice.

    “I need urgent help from someone who’d be willing to act as my fiancé during a family party on February the 24th. The only thing I expect is the ability to sing praises of our love and to compliment my aunts. It’ll take around 4 hours and then we end our relationship. Age from 35 to 40. It’d be great if you knew something about the sea because I'd like to introduce you as a sailor who’s never home and afterwards, you die. Can anybody help?”

    In which Jaskier looks for a fake fiancé... and finds Geralt. A man who Jaskier wants to stay.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,388
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    121
    Kudos:
    778
    Bookmarks:
    83
    Hits:
    3783
  9. Tags
    Summary

    — Где твой хозяин, красотка? — спросил он, и собака чихнула. Лютик рассмеялся. — Ладно, можешь остаться здесь, но я точно не смогу взять тебя домой. Сомневаюсь, что в моей квартире нам двоим найдется место.

    Собака закрыла глаза, явно чувствуя себя прекрасно, и Лютик, пожав плечами, снова взял ручку, пытаясь переписать строчки стиха.

    — Плотва! — он услышал низкий, грубый, явно мужской голос. Собака на его коленях подняла голову, но не встала.

    — Плотва, — голос приблизился, и Лютик поднял глаза, чтобы посмотреть на того, кто, вероятно, был владельцем собаки.

    И… да. Боже.

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    1,055
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    16
    Hits:
    109
  10. Tags
    Summary

    “People like me now and I hate it.” A gruff, almost growl of a voice says from behind him. Jaskier jumps out of his skin and into the rafters. He was startled sure, but also whoever had just spoken most certainly just saw him put bread in his pants.

    “Beg pardon?” He manages to get out and he turns around. Oh oh. It’s the gorgeous man, his muse, the one he just sang a song about without permission in front of a crowd. The one whose forearm was thicker than his neck. The one whose thighs, Jaskier stopped that train of thought before it could begin.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,723
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    172
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1175
  11. Tags
    Summary

    [...] “Where’s your owner, girl?” he asked and she sneezed, Jaskier laughed at the reaction “Okay, you can stay here, but I can’t take you home with me, I doubt my apartment has room for both of us.”

    The dog closed her eyes, comfortable with the position she was, and Jaskier shrugged, picking up his pen again, trying to rewrite a verse.

    “Roach!” he heard a low, rough and clearly male voice calling, the dog in his lap raised her head, but didn’t get up.

    “Roach” the voice got closer and Jaskier looked up to see the one who’s probably the owner of that dog.

    Oh, dear. [...]

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,119
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    333
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    1592
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Once his chestnut locks were as silky smooth as they were going to get, Jaskier placed the silver brush back on the tabletop and sighed. The Phantom had left him another plain red rose with a plain black ribbon around the stem. No note. No name. Just Madame Yennefer’s quiet, “He was pleased with you.” 

    A whisper in passing.

    OR

    A Phantom of the Opera crossover that fixes a lot of gross stuff about the original! Nothin' but fluff.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,689
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    159
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    1122
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier, Sugar's renowned singer and Geralt's fiance, has gone missing. All Geralt wants to do is buy a mansion on the coast and marry the one he loves. The bounty hunter has to find him first, and in this wild west au, it will be certainly be a trial.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,032
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    277
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Forced into hiding after a rather unfortunate event with someone his family deems 'the enemy', Julian Alfred Pankratz, rising superstar singer, finds himself back in the Old Country, stuck in a decrepit mansion by his lonesome. His days are filled with endless wandering through the empty rooms and frequent visits to the wine cellar until a storm sweeps something unexpected into his back yard - a girl dressed in white with scared eyes and a bleeding arm.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    81,196
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    118
    Kudos:
    684
    Bookmarks:
    147
    Hits:
    8761
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier had always had a lot of problems in his life.

    His parents' rejection for who he is: a musician and a bisexual man, the university he chose to attend, the friends he chose to have, the list goes on.

    So when Jaskier's new problems become losing his apartment and his rising student debt, he sits at a standstill. Yennefer, his closest friend yet, has come to save him, suggesting to live with her friend 'Geralt', a man with an apartment big enough for at least three people.

    Not shortly after meeting this mysterious man did Jaskier find himself wrapped up in the most exciting and exhilarating moments of his life yet. From everything from angry, heartbreak songs to lonely parties, Jaskier goes on his most fiery ride of his life yet, all while being in love.

    So maybe his only problem wasn’t just student debt.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,558
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    197
  16. Tags
    Summary

    'Before' Geralt wouldn't have conceived of YouTube or being a Witcher in a world with little to no magic. 'Now' Geralt though has over a few million subscribers who enjoy watching him set fire to dummies with his brothers Lambert and Eskel.

    ***
    Reincarnated!Geralt becomes a YouTuber in a time where Witcher's are not needed. Is reunited with his family, but is missing something, but he doesn't know what.

    ***
    ’Shh, shut up. The White Wolf’s having a moment.’ Lamberts usual drawl is made into a slur from the alcohol he’d consumed at the party.

    The camera captured very little of what the holder wanted. The pitch black of night consumed most of the frame, and everything was out of focus from the shakes the holder had.

    In the bottom right hand corner though, sitting in the paved driveway was a mused Geralt, clutching at a guitar to his chest, not playing it but caressing its surface.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,830
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    29
    Kudos:
    154
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    993
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt gets a cut on his finger, but he ends up leaving with much more than that.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    784
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    73
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    453
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier’s beginning to think that confessing his feelings via song was a bad idea…

    But maybe it wasn’t so bad after all. Maybe.

    (The sequel to "wish i were heather".)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,144
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    139
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    904
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt encounters a stranger, but he feels...not so strange.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    537
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    50
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    271
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Everything was going swimmingly as he ended his original song and prepared to finish up his set with a sweet little love ballad.

    That was until he spotted a familiar head of silver hair, loosely hanging over a firmly muscular build, wearing some sort of black dress-shirt. He looked… wonderful. And, to make matters worse, his hand rested on the back of an undeniably stunning, dark-haired woman.

    It was then that Jaskier had his worst idea yet.

    ---

    A Modern AU where Jaskier is a singer at a local restaurant. He not-so-coincidentally chooses to sing “Heather” by Conan Gray on the night when Geralt and his beautiful new girlfriend decide to visit.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,350
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    187
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    1208

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