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  1. 6

    Tags
    Summary

    It's Whumptober and this is my contribution.
    It's multi-chapter and I promise that it will be resolved happily.
    It's just gonna be a...road.

    Title from Florence + the Machine's Drumming Song

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    948
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    251
  2. 28

    Tags
    Summary

    It arrived on a Saturday afternoon. David approached it warily, a looming presence in the corner of their new house where he had planned on a tasteful seating grouping. Having missed the spectacle of its arrival, it almost felt to David as if it had simply appeared. An ominous warning that his worst fear may well be realized: the person you marry does not stay the person you marry.

    "Relax, David. It’s just a piano," Patrick says.

    Or, a little bit of sentimental fluff about how Patrick learns to play the piano.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,556
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    83
    Kudos:
    213
    Bookmarks:
    28
    Hits:
    988
  3. 53

    Tags
    Summary

    Someone from David's past stops by the store unexpectedly, and Patrick is forced to confront the strong feelings this arrival brings out in him.

    OR

    David's ex shows up out the blue and Patrick turns into a bit of a green-eyed-monster.

    EDIT: THE RATING HAS BEEN SHIFTED UP TO A HARD E for chapter 3 lol

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,362
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    40
    Kudos:
    309
    Bookmarks:
    53
    Hits:
    5108
  4. 65

    Tags
    Summary

    “What if I read that too?” Patrick asks one day over breakfast, setting David’s coffee down carefully on the table as he watches his husband flip his book over to concentrate on his breakfast.

    David shoots him a startled look. “Do you want to?”
     

    Or, five times Patrick reads a book of David’s, and one they read together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,751
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    136
    Kudos:
    283
    Bookmarks:
    65
    Hits:
    2120
  5. 25

    Summary

    A series of vignettes of the before, the during, and the after of David and Patrick's wedding.

    Words:
    14,100
    Works:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    25
  6. 32

    Summary

    A series of missing relationship moments, all ultimately playing a role in patrick's decision to propose.

    Words:
    23,084
    Works:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    32
  7. 2

    Tags
    Summary

    “We aren’t even playing chess, David. This is checkers.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    381
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    40
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    255
  8. 8

    Tags
    Summary

    Patrick wears one of David's sweater and David is like, really into it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,119
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    129
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    1351
  9. 59

    Tags
    Summary

    “I’m going to work on wedding planning,” Patrick says, smacking a kiss onto David’s lips, “And you are going to reconcile with your sister.”

    David wrings his hands. “But — you can’t tell the difference between eggshell and ivory!”

    “Better make up quickly, then!”

    Or, Patrick and David get engaged. Alexis worries about getting left behind.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,937
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    40
    Kudos:
    519
    Bookmarks:
    59
    Hits:
    3095
  10. 7

    Tags
    Summary

    Patrick acquires a toboggan. Matters escalate from there.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,356
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    195
  11. 38

    Tags
    Summary

    So this one starts out at the end of Season 4 Episode 1 - Dead Guy in Room 4. I have no idea how long it will go on, but I’m excited to try my hand at writing some smexy (smutty/sexy) time for these two.

    I know the start of their relationship has been done over and over, and done well. But I’d like to add my little voice to the mix.

    ** Spoilers for Season 4 onward **

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,566
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    183
    Kudos:
    221
    Bookmarks:
    38
    Hits:
    2819
  12. 12

    Tags
    Summary

    The last place Patrick expects to discover himself is trapped in a snow storm with nothing but his past for company.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,418
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    83
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    531
  13. 11

    Tags
    Summary

    When Patrick had said let’s focus on the business, David’s face had shuddered, and for a second, Patrick had been hopeful David was going to argue.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,359
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    126
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    737
  14. 8

    Tags
    Summary

    David Rose is the seasonal manager for an artisanal Gelateria. One cold, cold winter, his sole regular customer is the new guy in town, and believe it or not, he's not just there for the ice cream.

    Shameless flirting, ruthless trolling, and one infernal singing penguin.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,461
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    40
    Kudos:
    55
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    278
  15. 33

    Tags
    Summary

    Sebastien Raine is coming to town, and David isn't looking forward to seeing him. Not just because Seb is notoriously awful, but also because David is single, and a single David can be a dangerous thing around an ex. But what if, just for a few days, he wasn't single?
    That's where his hyper-capable business partner comes in...

    This is the fake boyfriends AU that no one asked for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,107
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    344
    Kudos:
    227
    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    3694
  16. 5

    Tags
    Summary

    David narrows his eyes, “First of all, it’s not my fault that you have no sense of fashion. And second of all, are you going to punch me? Because if you are, please try to avoid the nose, it’s harder to cover up nose breaks with makeup than black eyes.”

    “Oh my god,” Jason mutters, “Are all rich kids psychos?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,714
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    25
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    227
  17. *

    Tags
    Summary

    David gapes at the man calling himself David’s husband. “You think I’m falling for the married amnesiac trap? Yeah, no, my sister has been-there done-that and sent me the Embassy’s postcards.”

    Or, David falls off a ladder and can’t remember Schitt’s Creek. Things fall apart and come back together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    38,537
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    556
    Kudos:
    1799
    Bookmarks:
    454
    Hits:
    18537
  18. *

    Tags
    Summary

    "Patrick does so much for him. He feels slightly choked up just thinking about it. The taxes and spreadsheets and dinners he cooks and the coffees he makes him in the mornings. All the times David’s fallen asleep on his lap while they were watching baseball and Patrick’s pulled a blanket over him. He starts to feel slightly anxious because he doesn’t even know where to start, it’s so much and he’s never going to be able to do it justice in comparison."

     

    Or, Alexis teaches David about love languages, and David gets all in his head.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,563
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    207
    Kudos:
    1089
    Bookmarks:
    263
    Hits:
    7817
  19. 3

    Tags
    Summary

    “Roland’s cabin.”

    “Ew. What about it?”

    “I think we should go for a weekend. I already asked, he said it would be fine. I just think it would be nice, A. For us to get away for a little while, and B. For you to experience some of those fun summer things you missed out on as a kid. Swimming and bonfires and catching fireflies.”

    “Why would you think talking about touching bugs would help convince me? It’s doing the opposite.”

    “It’ll be fun! Like summer camp. Except we can drink and won’t get sent home for getting frisky in the bunks.” He said this last part in a low voice, in a tone which he knew from past experience David had a very hard time resisting.

    “Fine. But if I see so much as one moth, I’m leaving.”

     

    Or, the boys have a weekend summertime getaway.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,488
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    31
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    174
  20. 13

    Tags
    Summary

    Marcy sends Patrick a package with his annual Christmas sweater and a surprise sweater for David.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,510
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    145
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    832

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