1 - 20 of 207 Works in Sassy Bilbo Baggins

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    "Bless this broken road, that led me straight to you."

     

    Sigrid, daughter of Bard the Bowman is thrust into a war and the destruction of her home that leads her into Prince Fili's arms and eventually his heart.

    Fili is on a mission to win back Erebor and take his rightful place beside his Uncle Thorin as heir to the throne. When the quest goes south when the Dragon is woke and the destruction that ensues, one thing he doesn't plan on is rescuing a blonde haired girl from an orc attack and bringing her to Erebor for protection.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,499
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    78
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1407
  2. Tags
    Summary

    During the Battle of the Five Armies, Bilbo dies. On the other side, he's met by the Essence of the Universe - and they are not pleased with this turn of events. Deciding to send Bilbo back, they give him two advantages: knowledge, and strength.

    Bilbo is born as a dragon of the First Age with all the memories of the hobbit Bilbo Baggins. First, he has to survive several thousand years as a dragon... and then, when he's finally a hobbit again, he has to deal with keeping his identity secret while traveling with the Company of thirteen dwarves. With guilt eating him up and worry of the future gnawing at his bones, Bilbo sets off for the March of Erebor. He can only hope he won't fall for a certain dwarven king on his way there... again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,349
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    55
    Kudos:
    176
    Bookmarks:
    57
    Hits:
    1880
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Arriving in Valinor at the end of Return of the King, Bilbo was supposed to find peace. His aching heart and body were supposed to heal. But the wounds and losses of the past will not stay buried and those lost on the Quest to Erebor haunt his thoughts. So, he makes it his mission to fix it, even if he has to appeal to Eru Himself.

    Even if it costs him his own Paradise.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,931
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    221
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    2813
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Thorin was at a loss. He was a monster slayer. A killer of all evil creatures who prey on humanity. Including vampires. Especially vampires. He hated vampires. He wouldn't be content until he eradicated every last one of the foul beings.

    So what in Mahal's name was he doing sitting here in a dusty armchair next to a cold hearth drinking tea (of all things!) with a (admittedly rather cute) vampire. The same vampire that he came to this old castle to kill.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    233,112
    Chapters:
    70/?
    Comments:
    711
    Kudos:
    1154
    Bookmarks:
    229
    Hits:
    24557
  5. Tags
    Summary

    The Quest of Erebor was a success. Erebor was reclaimed. There was a Durin, albeit distant, on the throne.

    Life went on and everyone lived a life. Yet for the members of the Company, life was never the same. They grieved and grieved until even that made them numb.

    But they couldn't exactly do anything about what had come to past, right?

    Right?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,134
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    69
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    654
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Thorin has been warned to be wary of the fairy folk who seduce travelers and drag them into their underground lairs, but when a fairy offers him shelter from a summer storm, he learns that everything he heard about them was completely wrong. Or, perhaps, not really wrong at all. Just a little unexpected.

    or,

    In which Thorin thinks hobbits are magical fairies, because why else would he feel this way around Bilbo Baggins?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,969
    Chapters:
    3/5
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    125
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    1196
  7. Tags
    Summary

    The Master of Laketown has a daughter and let's just say self entitlement runs in the family.

    After the Company is caught breaking into the weapons room. Then Thorin's declaration to bring the wealth back to the town, her eyes fell on Bilbo. In that brief moment she decided the Hobbit will make a perfect pet. Persuading her father isn't an issue which makes Bilbo and the Dwarfs journey alot more harder.

    Messing with the timeline a little. Bilbo and the Company have arrived in Laketown about 2 weeks earlier than in the films. Also Kili isn't dying because I don't want to take him out of the action in this story.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    46,027
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    33
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    598
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Belladonna Baggins is nearly 3 years past her majority and time is running out. If she doesn't find a husband soon she will loose not only her inheritance but Bag end and everything inside it as well. Just when she thinks she will have to settle for Bobby Bolger Gandalf shows up looking for a burglar.

    Dwarves won't let an unmarried female travel with them, and when Bella's cousin Fortinbras hears this he offers up a solution - have one of the Dwarves marry Bella, save her estate and she can travel to help them on their quest. Of course a contractual marriage of necessity isn't the best way to start a relationship, especially between two people who have vastly different cultures.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,696
    Chapters:
    17/?
    Comments:
    92
    Kudos:
    382
    Bookmarks:
    121
    Hits:
    8862
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Hobbits had a deep connection with the earth. It was obvious in their bright vibrant fields, their warm hearths, and the utter life they breathed into everything they did. Their connection was perhaps even deeper than a normal outsider would even begin to understand. The spirit of earth and nature was in everything they did, the clothes they wore, the food they ate, even the water they drank. There was a much deeper reason as to why the Shire was so full of life.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,858
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    104
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    853
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Dwalin no es el enano más paciente del mundo. Pero teniendo en cuenta, que el maldito apocalipsis se ha desatado y Sauron batalla con hordas de zombies, es posible que su cuota de dulzura sea la mas adecuada. Sobretodo para el gran tonto Rey exiliado, que tiene por mejor amigo.
    [AU moderno. Apocaliptico]

    Series
    Language:
    Español
    Words:
    2,764
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Hits:
    12
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Each respectable dwarf has a craft and that is to say that practically every dwarf has a craft. A skill that every part of their being goes into the create or do something that is truly remarkable. However, it is also true that every dwarf has a One and they are expected to drop everything to be with them.

    Now that hardly made sense to a king who very well had other things to do than to go off with someone the moment their eyes met.

    |In which not all soulmates end up romantically involved with each other|

    WIP that sporadically updates. First Two chapters are prologue.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,222
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    5
    Hits:
    69
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Dim was the sun compared to the gold. Cold was the fire that once raged against his people when looked upon with the heated glance. No wine, mead, ale, or spirit could intoxicate him like the lips that brought forth the most enthralling verses. To consume them would be a sin but to live without ever tasting them would send his spirit wandering the halls of Mahal until his creator banished him from his realms.
    --
    AU where Gold sickness is just Bilbo sickness
    AKA Arkenstone who?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    52,507
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    222
    Bookmarks:
    58
    Hits:
    4628
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Love can conquer all, they say. Even death.
    It's a statement both Bilbo and Thorin will have to verify as they are both set on finding each other in two completely different parts of the Valar under the rule of two divinities.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,008
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    301
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    3287
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Missions:

    Dinner
    | Time limit 09:07:30 |
    You have one wizard and thirteen famished dwarves arriving for dinner to discuss your adventure. Be sure to make a good first impression and satisfy their stomachs. Mini game at your kitchen can be done to prepare more fulfilling dishes. Ingredients can be bought in the marketplace.
    Completed | Grade: A
    Reward: +5 Reputation

    Pack
    | Time limit 00:20:30 |
    Prepare for the long quest to Erebor. Pack up everything from the list on your desk. Additional items are allowed, but be careful for it eats up stamina.
    Completed | Grade: A-
    Reward: +2 Health
    Note: You forgot your handkerchief.

    Blast it.

    ___

    Note: Repost story from old account, which was lost.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,041
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    318
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Sometimes we need to face our problems in order to get over them

    But what if the problem would be better off not being faced?

    Sequel to "Battle of the mind and the heart"

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,040
    Chapters:
    15/15
    Comments:
    130
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    599
  16. Tags
    Summary

    "His clothes would have caused a perfectly respectable hobbit to blanch in horror, mussed and casual from months of travelling; the bruises decorating his fair skin would have provoked a gasp; the ragged state of his unusually straight and unusually short dark hair, a flinch; all combined with the spectacle of a Hobbit -- even a Took - with a sword at the hip would have caused even the most hardy of hobbits a fainting spell.

    However, Bilbo Took was not a perfectly respectable hobbit."

    Or that Dwobbit!Bilbo AU. Goddamnit.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,934
    Chapters:
    2/8
    Comments:
    88
    Kudos:
    838
    Bookmarks:
    254
    Hits:
    15122
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Neither Gandalf nor the Dwarves were prepared for the Hobbit they found at Bag-End. Gandalf is ready to retire back to Valinor, Thorin's hair is graying at a more rapid pace then ever before, and Bilbo's tongue is sharper than any sword could ever hope to be.

    *Rating/Warnings/Tags may change as story progresses*

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,052
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    102
    Kudos:
    518
    Bookmarks:
    134
    Hits:
    7202
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo Baggins was nobody special.

    He paid his bills on time, brushed his teeth twice a day, and ran a small Teahouse down the lane called Bella’s Brewhouse, fondly named in honour of his passed mother. Bilbo was 35, had a Degree in English Literature, and lived alone.

    Nothing exciting or extraordinary happened to him.
    That was, until his oldest friend Gandalf Greyhame arrived on his doorstep late at night, after a favour.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    165,662
    Chapters:
    26/?
    Comments:
    473
    Kudos:
    686
    Bookmarks:
    177
    Hits:
    20649
  19. Tags
    Summary

    "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy." - Hamlet

    The history of Middle Earth is long, stretching back many ages, to even a time before the sun and the moon graced the sky. In the long years, much has happened and much as been lost, even a whole race. The Cementumenosse, in the common tongue, 'the wielders of earth'. Are naught but legend, even among their kin, the Elves. However, their history, and especially, one of their number, will have a marked effect on the world. It could be for good or it could be for evil, for all of the Cementumenosse are Darkness Marked. The pain of their history etched into their very soul.

     

    TAGS TO CHANGE AS CHAPTER ARE ADDED
    PLEASE READ NOTE AT END OF CHAPTER 1

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,395
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    133
    Bookmarks:
    42
    Hits:
    1990
  20. Tags
    Summary

    What starts out as a random encounter with an elderly scholar in a dusty college library―debating literature and history as academics have a habit of doing―suddenly becomes a bizarre adventure that drags one disgruntled student across a fantasy world that harkens closely to an out-of-control D&D campaign. Can she manage to survive this madcap quest? The hobbit’s nice, at least.

    [Alternatively titled: I Went on a Quest to Kill a Dragon Because I Would Rather Do That Instead of a Fifteen-page Research Paper: An Academic Exploration in Productive Procrastination, or Thorin All But Dared Me, I Swear: A Tale of One Competitive College Student's Journey in Middle-Earth]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,591
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    153

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