Midnight Crew - Freeform
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Boxcars is wounded in an ambush, confronting Droog with the potential of losing someone important to him (shipping implied but not overt); Deuce offers comfort the only way he knows how--derpily.
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Four Midnight Crew scenes.
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She was always Slick's game, but Droog plays hard.
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Bootleggers and Broomsticks by lucky_spike
Fandoms: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
14 May 2012
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The setting is a place called HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY, and four students are about to embark on a MARVELOUS JOURNEY through the DANGEROUS WATERS OF ADOLESCENCE, as well as THE LESS DANGEROUS WATERS OF ORGANIZED CRIME. They are also ostensibly GOING TO LEARN MAGIC.
And, quite possibly, there will be a great deal of KISSING ON THE FACE.
(In which the Midnight Crew goes to Hogwarts, Spike writes unencumbered by a plot, and promotes all the ships.)
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The Troubles of a Legitimate Businessman (The Opening Act of A Legitimate Businessman Part 1) by Halberdier
Fandoms: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
14 May 2012
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Jack Noir - I mean Jose Vantas, I said Jose Vantas, not Jack Noir - is a legitimate businessman, just trying to run a damn real estate business and casino chain. But it's the busiest goddamn week of the year, and now here's some damn freaking detective jerkhole coming into his office and just not leaving him the crap alone. Jack needs this like he needs someone to stab him in the eye with a cigarette holder. That is, NOT VERY MUCH AT ALL. --A reimagining of the first meeting between Problem Sleuth and Spades Slick. It goes about as well as you'd expect.
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The Associates of a Legitimate Businessman (The Opening Act of a Legitimate Businessman Part 2) by Halberdier
Fandoms: Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), Homestuck
26 Jun 2012
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Patrick Sloan continues to try to hire the infamous gangster Jack Noir and his band of beatemup peddlescats known as the Midnight Crew. He decides to bring some buddies along, his associates Peter Inesco and "Ace" Dick Dunn. With a lead on the location of the Midnight Crew's underground hideout, Team Sleuth are sure to come out on top this time, right?
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The Secrets of a Legitimate Businessman (The Opening Act of a Legitimate Businessman Part 3) by Halberdier
Fandoms: Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), Homestuck
18 Jul 2012
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Listen, there's a lot of things that Jack Noir don't like. He don't like greenhorn baby sleuths that won't leave him alone. He don't like other gangsters that try to muscle in on his turf. And he sure as hell won't like the phone call he's about to make to a certain vamp in a shiny green and black trenchcoat. But there are some things he just has to do.
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The Investigation of a Legitimate Businessman (The Opening Act of a Legitimate Businessman Part 4) by Halberdier
Fandoms: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth - Fandom, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
19 Oct 2012
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Ever wonder how Patrick Sloan, Peter Inesco and "Ace" Dick Dunn got wrapped up in this mess? Well, let me take it from the top.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,543
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 15
- Hits:
- 618
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The lovely Ms. Paint has been kidnapped by Lord English and The Felt!
Slick has to go find her and get her back, but will walking right into the enemy's territory really work? -
The Lifestyle of a Legitimate Businessman (The Opening Act of a Legitimate Businessman Part 5) by Halberdier
Fandoms: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth - Fandom, Midnight Crew - Fandom, Intermission - Fandom
09 Feb 2013
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Our intrepid problem sleuth, Patrick Sloan, goes in for a meeting with Paolo Diamante, known to the underworld as infamous gangster Diamonds Droog. The two take up a friendly game of pool. Or is it something more? Is it, perhaps...... a heavy handed metaphor??? Find out in the long awaited next installment in... A Legitimate Businessman!
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Your name is Jane Crocker, and you're starting to understand why people say you're the one who needs a moirail.
In which Dirk Strider is a nervous mother hen with golden pipes, Jake English and Roxy Lalonde have met their matches for sexual tension, Karkat Vantas and his romcoms are pervasive, Gamzee Makara may or may not have a little black crush, John Egbert ruins all of the undercover shenanigans, John Egbert's car is tragically lost in the line of duty, the Midnight Crew are devious scoundrels, and Jane Crocker gives everyone heart attacks.
Series
- Part 2 of Life with Dirk and Jane
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The Best Laid Plans of a Legitimate Businessman by Halberdier
Fandoms: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth - Fandom, Midnight Crew - Fandom
01 Jan 2015
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A LEGITIMATE BUSINESSMAN -- ACT II
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So the day's almost here, the moment of truth, the final event, the big group party takedown of The Felt. The Midnight Crew's here. Team Sleuth is here. Patrick Sloan, Peter Inesco and "Ace" Dick Dunn sit down around the table with Jack Noir, Paolo Diamante, Clint Duccio and Hank Bachman to lay out their plans, say their peace, then head out their separate ways before the big heist.Series
- Part 2 of A Legitimate Businessman
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“You’re not the fucking boss; I am,” spits Slick.
“Temporarily the boss.”
“I’m the boss until I am fucking out of here and get to watch all of you die again,” he says, gesticulating with the cue stick threateningly. “I’m not gonna bother with the stupid pins. That’d be way less satisfying than stabbing each of you over and over and over again. Which is exactly what I’m gonna do.”
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He huffs, concentrating on the cold, dusty concrete that’s pressed up against his cheek. Bloody spit trickles from the side of his mouth as he looks ahead and tries not to panic. If he focuses on the peeling patch of dry wall across the room, the spinning’s almost nonexistent, and he can almost convince himself that he’s okay, that a blade didn’t slice open his lip and a fist hadn’t rammed itself so hard into his left eye that he tumbled to the ground.
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He needs to go on a walk; he needs to clear his head. Stop thinking, relax, breathe.
Mistake number one.
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Basically, Spades Slick and Diamonds Droog get a bit drunk, which leads to some shenanigans involving the bedroom.
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A break-in, an argument and a sick Fin.
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Sleuth likes to dance. Slick prefers otherwise. Sleuth wants to dance, and he'll get it.
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The End of a Legitimate Businessman by Halberdier
Fandoms: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic), MS Paint Adventures
07 Apr 2020
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A LEGITIMATE BUSINESSMAN -- ACT III
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So far, we've followed intrepid problem sleuth Patrick Sloan as he attempts to hire The Midnight Crew to take down The Felt and a certain unknown mobster kingpin named The DMK. We've learned about his Troubles, met his Associates, learned some Secrets, reviewed the Investigation, and examined everyone's Lifestyle. Then we watched as everyone involved set out their Best Laid Plans. So now we'll finally see how all of this Ends. The series concludes with the chapters herein. You didn't think I'd leave you guys hanging, did you?Series
- Part 3 of A Legitimate Businessman