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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Bonjour à vous, mystérieux lecteur ! Je suis Ishtar et... bon, 'savez quoi ? Oublions les présentations ! Pour être honnête, j'ignore mon âge. J'étais là avant la fondation d'Uruk. Je le serais longtemps après la mort de vos descendants. Disons que je suis vieille, d'accord ? Alors ça ne se voit pas, parce que j'ai certainement l'air d'avoir quelque chose comme 17 ans. 'va falloir me faire confiance. Ah, ah !

    Commençons par le début : si les étranges idéogrammes sur ce document ont du sens à vos yeux, c'est que quelqu'un vous a enseigné ma langue natale. Félicitation, j'ai affaire à un personnage éduqué ! D'où vous venez ? Est-ce qu'il se passe un truc intéressant à votre époque ? Parce qu'évidemment, quelques siècles (millénaires, plutôt) se seront écoulés depuis la rédaction de ces lignes, alors excusez ma curiosité. Pff... sois réaliste. Tu sais que personne ne lira ce bidule. Quelle idée pour une déesse de tenir un journal ?

    Series
    Language:
    Français
    Words:
    12,479
    Chapters:
    12/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    64
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Enkidu has a new tree which Gilgamesh absolutely loathe and constantly threatens to get rid of. 5 times Enkidu begs him to reconsider and 1 time they don't.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,106
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    140
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Crowley hadn’t meant to cause any trouble in Babel, really he was just enjoying how very clever the humans could be and resting on the laurels of the Flood (who else could take credit for making humans so evil they had to be wiped out, after all). But, he was there and he encouraged them to ask ‘how high can it be built?’ and well... that never ends well. The Tower falls and the language of the Earth is shattered. Angels can still understand all the languages but demons lose that ability. Worse- because Aziraphale and Crowley were at the Tower when it fell, they share in the curse of Babel and can never again understand each other’s words.

    Explores how an angel and a demon learn to trust each other when they cannot speak, how the Arrangement comes to be without negotiation, and how they conspire to stop the Apocalypse when they cannot plan.

    The fallout from the Tower of Babel incident from Babel itself to The Apocalypse.

    (note: all explicit scenes are going to be linked so they can be skipped)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    55,352
    Chapters:
    10/14
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    176
    Kudos:
    127
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    3169
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Азирафель нахмурился.
    — Возможно. Тогда, как ты говоришь, если тебя развоплотить, то искушений будет еще больше?
    — Именно это я и хочу сказать. Не говоря уже о том, что они будут лучше, еще эффективней. И, возможно, более насильственными. Многие демоны наслаждаются подобным.
    — А ты нет? — тихо спросил Азирафель.
    — О, — Кроли моргнул. — Эм… Нет, я имею в виду, мне нравится насилие. Мно-ого насилия, ага. Все это. Крики. Эм…
    — В самом деле, — ответил Ангел.
    Благослови его Господь.

    Эта история об Азирафеле и Кроули, начиная с Эдема и заканчивая неудавшимся Апокалипсисом, со сценой раз в десятилетие, в каждое десятилетие, и так 6,000 лет. Я описываю преимущественно из сериального канона с элементами книжного, опираясь на Библию и исторические факты.

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    76,587
    Chapters:
    137/606
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    236
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Some illustrated Mesopotamia!Crowley hair appreciation created for Cold Omens Zine!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    0
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    94
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    922
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Aziraphale frowned. "What you’re saying, then, is that discorporating you would cause more temptations in the end?”
    “That’s exactly what I’m saying. Not to mention, they’d be better quality, more efficient temptations. And possibly more violent. A lot of Demons really enjoy that sort of thing.”
    “And you don’t?” asked Aziraphale, softly.
    “Oh.” Crawly blinked. “Erm. No, I mean, I really like violence. Big violence-er, me. Always calling for more violence in Hell. I like a good flaying, y’know. All that. Screaming. Er.”
    “Indeed,” said the Angel.
    Bless it.

    -

    This story follows Aziraphale and Crowley's experiences from Eden to the failed Apocalypse, with one scene per decade, every decade, for the entire 6,000 years. I drew predominantly from show canon, with elements of book canon, as well as Biblical and historical inspiration.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    373,711
    Chapters:
    606/606
    Comments:
    2413
    Kudos:
    524
    Bookmarks:
    87
    Hits:
    19764
  7. Tags
    Summary

    What was it about that strange city that beckoned them closer?

    (slight canon divergence, very sorry. See notes for explanation)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    371
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    83
  8. Tags
    Summary

    The outraged thrill of a divine challenge went singing through his veins. Was it his hubris that had enticed them to dare meddle in his affairs, his so-called arrogance his citizens whispered about? Very well, then, he’d show them how justified it was. There was not supposed to be anyone stronger than him in the entire kingdom. After all, he was two parts god and Enkidu was barely above a beast.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,986
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    44
  9. Tags
    Summary

    The year is 1969 and the assyriology department of the Paris University is preparing for it's first excavation of the legendary Uruk city in southern Iraq. Led by Professor Jean Armand de Treville, the young archeologists Olivier "Arthos" de la Fère, Porthos du Vallon and René "Aramis" d'Herblay are looking to uncover the secrets of a small clay figurine that de la Fère uncovered five years prior.

    Meanwhile, a student called Charles d'Artagnan is reading all available literature on Uruk in an attempt to pass time in recovery from surgery. Together with his roommate, Constance Bonacieux, they manage to get involved with the excavation too, but they're not the only ones - in order to save the project from collapsing before it even begins, Professor de Treville is forced to bring other powers on board.

    What is that clay figurine and why does it compel people's attention so? And just how many people have a stake in this situation?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,208
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    189
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Two brothers. One wishes for the happiness of all mankind and the annihilation of all evil in the world. The other wishes to see through his deformity and understand who he is. All is changed when they are dragged into the Fourth Holy Grail War, one that never should've happened. AU of Fate/Zero and Fate/Apocrypha. Rating could change. R&R!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    178,256
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    101
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1891
  11. Tags
    Summary

    An old debt must be paid.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,506
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    438
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Crowley's changing relationship with plants, humanity, and the Angel of the Eastern Gate, from the Garden of Eden to a cottage in the South Downs.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,829
    Chapters:
    2/6
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    295
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Two first snows in Aziraphale and Crowley's lives: the world's first-ever snowfall, and the very first snow of the rest of their lives.

    Written for the Good Omens Bingo 2021's "first snow" and "kid" prompts.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,206
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    117
  14. Tags
    Summary

    “Thank you, angel.”  A weak hand was raised to touch Aziraphale’s cheek.

    “No need for that.  You saved me first.  Just rest,” he replied.  “I’ve warded this place so no mortals can find or enter it.  You’re safe.”

    During a war somewhere in ancient Mesopotamia, Aziraphale was sent to inspire an army in battle, not realizing what danger he is in until Crawly saves him at great personal cost.

    CW: Blood. I decided against the Graphic Depictions of Violence warning because there's no real description of graphic violence, per se. What is described is injuries and the healing of them.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,142
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    114
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    900
  15. Tags
    Summary

    “You know, there are a lot of things a person can do, with a human-shaped body... Lots of things that feel nice. Have you never… tried any of that, before?"

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,426
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    91
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    589
  16. Tags
    Summary

    “Nile, what’s a Karen?”

    “Oh, um . . . that’s like when an entitled racist white woman shows up five minutes before closing, asks to see the manager over an expired Target coupon, and tries to get some underpaid teenage cashier fired.”

    “Oh. I wrote someone a letter of complaint once. It’s in the British Museum.”

    “. . . Wait, you wrote a complaint to Ea-Nasir?

    “Oh god, was I a Karen?”

    “No, he had it coming.”

    “I burned down his house.”

    “. . . Okay, so you do have the ‘can I speak to your manager’ haircut…”


    I needed to find a way to top “Yusuf brought pasta to Italy”, so here I offer you “Andy burned down copper scammer Ea-Nasir's house.”
    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,559
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    246
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    1386
  17. Tags
    Summary

    “Crawly please don’t patronize the humans, Noah’s granddaughter was quite partial to those beasts.” Aziraphale sighed and Crawly blinked in confusion.

    “I don’t understand, they still have one of the unicorn’s left if there aren't more inside. Why are you acting as if she’ll never get to see another one again?” Crawly looked as if everyone was overreacting.

    In which, Crawly has no idea what sex is and Aziraphale teaches them. In a very hands-on sort of way.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,177
    Chapters:
    7/8
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    29
    Kudos:
    339
    Bookmarks:
    49
    Hits:
    6351
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Even for creatures that have lived for hundreds of years, Earth can hold many new experiences. Aziraphale, for one, is eager to experience them all. Though unfortunately not all of them end up being positive ones. And sometimes even the worst of experiences make a turn for something good.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,212
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    98
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    853
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Living among humans means sampling their activities, including the sexual ones. There's only one problem. Crawly isn't interested in women, but he is in Aziraphale, who is attracted to him in return. If Crawly agrees, Aziraphale would like to show him that physical affection can exist between two beings who are presenting as the same gender.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,614
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    145
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1620
  20. Tags
    Summary

    (Reboot de la épica de Gilgamesh basado en los personajes de Fate Grand Order/Fate Strange Fake, Gilgamesh y Enkidu.)

    Un rey despiadado, soberbio y egocéntrico.

    El arma de los dioses.
    ¿Es posible romper el destino?

    ¿Es posible transcender a la muerte?
    Sólo los dioses lo saben.

    Language:
    Español
    Words:
    258,174
    Chapters:
    55/55
    Comments:
    80
    Kudos:
    114
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    2417

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