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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is John Egbert, and two of your cagiest troll friends have just fled halfway across the continent to take shelter in your home. You are more than okay with this. You're determined to keep them safe and happy, no matter what you have to do. That's your responsibility as friendleader, right? (Unfortunately, keeping Karkat and Gamzee safe and alive is proving to be far more challenging than it should be.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    58,630
    Chapters:
    8/23
    Comments:
    48
    Kudos:
    121
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    2158
  2. Tags
    Summary

    A President and a comedian-turned-Rebellion-leader walk into a bar. Well, not a bar, but it's the President's office. And the President is the only one doing any walking in. It's unclear what the Rebellion leader is actually doing there or how he got in, but if this is a specific joke, there better be one hell of a punchline.

    Entry for the DirkJohn Big Bang 2020.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    126,560
    Chapters:
    16/26
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    101
    Kudos:
    90
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    2483
  3. Tags
    Summary

    a game changed, a path realigned and reset. even in all the chaos, the sylph is as always, drawn to the seer. a moth is drawn to the light. a relationship blooms in the new world all the players have been shunted onto, a strange place with horrifying denizens around the corner.
    mysteries will unravel, and tensions will be high, the question is... will they win the game?

     

    (all the trolls are alive! so are the kids? yeah, I have no clue how to write a summary, this is gonna be an ongoing project, and should update around once a week! yall better believe we need some good wholesome rosemary in these trying times!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,328
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    116
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Kk gets knocked up after a one night stand.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,958
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    59
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    543
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Dave had a penchant for weird things happening to him, and Karkat always seemed to get stuck with the people he hated most. But finding out they were both demigods? That was the final straw. Both boys were convinced that if the gods did exist, they must really hate their kids.

    Camp Half-Blood sent out a lot of quests, but Jade knew hers was special. She'd been at camp for less than a year, and she'd already gotten a quest to rescue two unknown demigods from their fate. The only downside was her questing buddies: the Crocs-wearing, chalk-eating camp weirdo Terezi Pyrope, and the "totally not jealous that Jade got a quest instead of him" Tavros Nitram. But no matter what, Jade wouldn't fail. She'd never hear the end of it from her friends if she did.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,911
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    79
    Kudos:
    74
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    733
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Dave and Karkat participate in the school musical. Karkat is the director, and Dave is cast as the lead.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,579
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    6
    Hits:
    22
  7. Tags
    Summary

    In which I get incredibly bored during quarantine, and rewrite Twilight, but with Eridan and Sollux. Statistically changed around 75% of the plot, for my own selfish reasons. Still tried to stay true to the original story- and yes, they still sparkle. Not sorry. All credit goes to Stephenie Meyer.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    177,807
    Chapters:
    26/?
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    70
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    2156
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Four adults crash on an Island and the world will never be the same.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,363
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    10
    Hits:
    62
  9. Tags
    Summary

    John Egbert lived his entire life on the island where he was born. John's never been a skilled swimmer... or skilled at magic or anything really... so he's eager to train for his upcoming trial of passage.
    Meanwhile, Dave Strider at the age of seventeen was dragged across the world and to a secluded little island with hardly any of the comforts of home. To make matters even worse, Dave's expected to swim out to the ocean and dive to find some trash to bring back to the island to complete some kind of trial of manhood once he turns eighteen.
    Neither of them are ready for what their real trail has instore for them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    119,793
    Chapters:
    32/?
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    91
    Bookmarks:
    9
    Hits:
    1250
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Nepeta Leijon's mother passed away not even a year ago. Now her older sister is raising her, despite her impending marriage. Nepeta makes time for her friends and their relationships. But can she manage her own?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    79,066
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    78
    Kudos:
    51
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    968
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Being a father is harder than you assumed it would be.
    But it’s also more rewarding than you ever imagined.

    Mister Egbert loses his mother on the same day he gains a son, a son who dropped from the sky and brought a book from the future and who will create a new universe one day.
    _________________________________________________________________

    This is the story of Mister Egbert raising John, a story about parenthood and running out of time.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,971
    Chapters:
    1/3
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    35
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Or: A Knight-Errant, a Naive Squire, A Brusque Tinkeress, and a Snarky Wizard walk into a bar, start a bar fight, proceed to get kicked out, and then accidentally topple the burgeoning empire of a corrupt politician or two before going on a vacation with some monster-slaying.

    UPDATE SCHEDULE:
    LATE EVENING EST MWF / EARLY MORNING EST TThSa
    OCCASIONAL DOUBLE UPDATES AS I HAVE THE GUMPTION FOR IT

    (Technically 23/365)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    55,736
    Chapters:
    20/?
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    27
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    467
  13. Tags
    Summary

    There was something soothing about watching the fruits of one's labor amble about, childishly, tripping over small obstacles and ambulating in all the ways that a living being notably did not ambulate. Still, every little mechanism worked the way they were intended to, with a little push-kick thingamabob to get the boy to hop over very slight gaps, inclines, things that could prevent it from moving. Robust tires ganked from some LEGO model that helped it move over most forms of surface that it was intended to move over. More LEGO armor hiding delicate circuitry. The "Untitled Robotics Class Project MK 2" was ready for action, readily beeping as it bumped into every little thing in John's living room. That one was John's suggestion, a little sensor that would make a chime whenever it bumped into something.

    64/365

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    783
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    33
  14. Tags
    Summary

    A brief (well, brief-ish) list of the acts that Foundation researcher Dr. Vriska Serket is no longer allowed to perform, for various reasons, as well as some other relevant documentation.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,108
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    53
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    505
  15. Tags
    Summary

    It's become Karkat's mission to give Dave the best birthday he can, and he gets the perfect idea. Why not give him a chance to meet his online friends in person?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,100
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    53
  16. Tags
    Summary

    “Just… Don’t be so blatant about anyone’s proclivities again, will you? Unless they’re your own.”

    Everyone present, including the stripper, considered it a cute joke. A playful deviancy, because that’s what Alphas are in some circles. A dirty joke. A whispered desire. Something to indulge in but avoid in real life, unless under pain-stakingly controlled circumstances.

    “So serious,” Gabriel sighs. “It’s not like I’ll be able to order you a stripper again any time soon. Try to cheer up a bit.”

    Castiel obliges, but can tell it’s more of a grimace than anything else. It’s rare for him to show nerves outwardly, but they’re starting to bleed through. Easy enough for Gabe to pick up on, but then that’s exactly why he’s been needling him.

    “We kinda know this guy, right? Dean wasn’t a dick. Not when we were kids.”

    “Which was a long time ago,” Castiel says. “But mother approves of the marriage, so everything will work out perfectly.”

     

    Weekly updates on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Current amount of chapters is estimate, but should be thereabouts. Be advised on that 'slow burn'. It is not a joke.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    77,569
    Chapters:
    45/53
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    602
    Kudos:
    310
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    11896
  17. Tags
    Summary

    what it says on the tin

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    248
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    56
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Five gods rent a flat in Manhattan. That sounded like the start of a bad joke.

    In which Loki Silvertongue is not the only lost god who falls to a world that isn’t his own.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    342,875
    Chapters:
    61/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2027
    Kudos:
    2526
    Bookmarks:
    483
    Hits:
    59161
  19. Tags
    Summary

    You voted for it so here it is. Karkat vantis was not an Alfa although it was better for the world to think he was, no he was an omega but a freaky mutation had somehow changed his scent and ruined his life. Now he hast to keep the secret under wraps. It hasn’t been too hard since he smells like an alpha anyway. Now if you can go through the rest of his life acting like one he will be golden. (Also this is probably a human stuck because The mutentshion of the scent is probably enough)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,306
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    150
  20. Tags
    Summary

    John Egbert, age 18, meets Dirk, his BFF's twin for the first time. Things Happen™. For John, also for the first time. Ever.

    ...but not everything he would have wanted to happen.

    Dave's there to help his dejected, puppy-eyed, twinky little virgin friend, ofc. With his dick. It's in the brocode or something.

     
    John Egbert written by cheeryPsycho (Mar)
    Dave Strider written by HorologiumParadox (Max)

    <3

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,636
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    82

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