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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Coen doesn't know why he bothers to try to understand or guide the game they are playing. But he's the DM, and it's his responsibility, and so their weekly game of D&D continues much as it always has, with chaos and him wondering about his sanity. And the sanity of his players.

    And he's quite sure that Jaskier has cursed dice, but they're only cursed to make his life a pain so he's allowing it.

    AKA: the AU where they're playing themselves as D&D characters, only it's comedic and not dramatic. And Geralt is still stubborn and won't say anything.

    A series of comedic drabbles, no real over arching plot line, and no firm update schedule. There is swearing and Lambert's questionable taste in food.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,547
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    201
  2. Tags
    Summary

    They say there’s a Mad Cat roaming the Continent — a Mad Cat who cannot die.

    After twenty years of silence, odd rumours are beginning to resurface regarding the witcher known as Julian of Kerack. Jaskier can take care of himself, and Geralt doesn’t think much of it. Until Jaskier goes missing — gone without a trace, just as the long, dark winter begins to set in.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,532
    Chapters:
    4/9
    Comments:
    92
    Kudos:
    198
    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    1771
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Curiosity killed the cat.
    The cat being a humble bard.
    Curiosity being a creature twice his size with a smoldering glare. Well, maybe it didn't kill the cat, just fucked with him a bit.

    In other words, Jaskier meets a dying witcher who warns him not to go into the western swamps. Naturally, he refuses to listen. Yennefer is unamused, yet loyal to her friends.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,912
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    228
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Finally, on the third day, Jaskier can’t bear it anymore. He texts Yennefer.
    "I’m going to ask you something and you are going to be 100% honest with me. Do I work at a mob bar?"

    - or -

    Jaskier encounters a large-ish speed bump named Geralt on the road to international pop stardom.

    - or -

    “You asked me to help you.” Geralt has the audacity to sound offended.
    Jaskier levers himself up, despite how the movement jostles his wobbly, throbbing brain. “And clearly I meant that I wanted you to kidnap me!”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,238
    Chapters:
    2/4
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    133
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    959
  5. Tags
    Summary

    **Wanted: Nude Model for painting (canvas, not you) - Men/women/other, serious inquiries only**

    For Larkin (or Jaskier, as she’s more commonly known), taking a side hustle as a nude model was an easy way for the struggling grad student to earn some easy money.

    For Geralt, a horse trainer, painting was a hobby; a way to help manage his anxiety and depression. Placing the ad itself was just the first step to changing his life forever.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,261
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    72
    Kudos:
    77
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    1292
  6. Tags
    Summary

    “It’s this dress,” Yennefer admitted. “It fastens up the back with about a hundred miniature buttons. It’s, not strictly possible for one to remove it on one’s own.”

    Jaskier snorted. “Oh? Well, how would usually get it off?”

    “Usually I just,” she said, and motioned, trying to convey the general idea of I unfasten them all at once, with magic. “Whoosh.”

    His eyes widened as he grasped the problem. “Ahh, I see,” he said. “That does sound very awkward.”

    Temporarily bereft of her magic, Yennefer finds herself in a tricky position.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,717
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    173
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    366
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Sugar and Spice Witcher Bingo
    Prompt: meet the family

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,254
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    54
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    201
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Sugar and Spice Witcher Bingo
    Prompt: rough

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,995
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    75
    Kudos:
    234
    Bookmarks:
    30
    Hits:
    2454
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier and Yennefer have hit a rough patch. Or a breakup fight, maybe. But if they're going out they're going out in style, so they decide to go out for one last night together.

    Witnessing a murder wasn't part of the plan, but can they solve it (and maybe their own problems) before the sun comes up?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,230
    Chapters:
    13/14
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    240
  10. Tags
    Summary

    "Anything but revenge." It was the last promise Julian's mother asked of him before she rode away to Blaviken. Ten years later, Julian has a new nickname and a vicious wanderlust. At a tavern in Posada, he spots the hilt of a sword, and the rest makes history.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,258
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    58
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    701
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Yennefer gets lost in a forest after a terrible attack on her life. Heavily wounded, she loses consciousness, and wakes up in a cabin with a strange man who seems to be unable to speak, and, well, the rest is history. (it's really not but i needed to end the summary somehow)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,320
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    81
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier is trying to figure out his feelings for Geralt. He cherishes their friendship above any other, but might there be more to it? What do the dreams he keeps having mean? Is he attracted to Geralt? Is he attracted to men? What should he do?

    Luckily Yennefer is close at hand and ready to help her bumbling friends, no matter what it takes.

    (Characters, tags and relationships will be added as I go)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,629
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    34
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    647
  13. Tags
    Summary

    "That's not why I'm here." Geralt growled, "An assassin was sent for me when I was in Flotsam, I don't know who by" he pulled down his collar to show the mostly-healed wound on his shoulder, "but they were good. I was unprepared, and they stabbed with this dagger," he gestured to the weapon in front of him, "before they ran. They could have killed me, but they didn't."
    "You think it was on purpose?" Yennefer's brow furrowed
    "I think it was a message."

     

     
    Geralt is attacked by an assassin, who leaves him with Jaskier's dagger in his shoulder and a lock of his bard's hair. Geralt works to save his friend, but there is something more sinister lurking beneath the surface.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,986
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    47
    Kudos:
    91
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1339
  14. Tags
    Summary

    One night, as Jaskier grades poetry papers in his office at Oxenfurt, he is disturbed by Yennefer of Vengerberg, who informs him that their mutual beau, Geralt, is missing. Here begins the saga of 5-ish Witchers who might have been Geralt but weren’t (and the one that was) and a road trip to rescue him before it's too late.

    *

    Set in the midst of Blood of Elves, after the events of S1 Netflix Show, and featuring Face-Blind Jaskier; AKA the 5+1 & Road Trip fic that nobody asked for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,917
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    41
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    183
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Sequel to Hold On

     

    It's been a year since Geralt and Yennefer rescued Jaskier from Nilfgaard's clutches.

    However, Nilfgaard still refuse to give up the hunt for both Jaskier and Ciri, leaving Geralt to guard his beloved Bard, keeping him safe from Nilfgaard, as they journey along the Path, with Ciri safely tucked away in Kaer Morhen.

    Nilfgaard is moving along the Continent at an alarming pace, taking over more and more of the South, leaving Jaskier fearful that Cahir will find him again and would take him away and cage him.

    They couldn't even being to guess what Destiny had in store for them.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    134,386
    Chapters:
    29/?
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    655
    Kudos:
    741
    Bookmarks:
    98
    Hits:
    24872
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier doesn’t actually know how much time has passed since the black-cloaked Nilfgaardians grab him after a performance in a shitty tavern in the backcountry of northern Kaedwen. He’d assumed--foolishly, apparently--that he was far enough north that any Nilfgaardian soldiers would be few and far between, likely just scouts or even deserters. It would have been hard to actually get any further north--the little backwater town where he’d been singing was just a day from the mountains. Anymore travel, and he’d find himself skirting the Trail up to Kaer Morhen, the Warlord’s Keep, and, well. He’s brazen, but not that brazen.

    (or: a wandering bard bites off more than he can chew with the political ballads, accidentally makes friends with a princess in exile, and finds the Warlord of the North in his debt.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,217
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    472
    Kudos:
    2045
    Bookmarks:
    612
    Hits:
    25766
  17. Tags
    Summary

    “It’s just the doctor said—”

    “I know what the doctor said. And here I am in bed, following her orders. So please sit down and stop fussing.”

    A sad smile comes onto his face and he says in an uncharacteristically small voice. “Sorry, I just – I just wanted to help.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    614
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    96
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Yennefer's just running a few errands, and doesn't expect to end up talking Geralt's bard down from a rooftop. Jaskier is ready to leap, and doesn't expect a certain mage to interrupt his grand finale. Both of them might just walk away with a better understanding of one another. (Or, a character study in borderline personality disorder.)

    (Bad Things Happen Bingo #3)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,795
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    288
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Yennefer made her decision a long time ago but she's starting to regret it. She does want a baby. So when she finds out about the existence of the Law of Surprise she decides to use it to her advantage, hoping it'll get her a child.

    Geralt has pretty much the opposite problem. He has a child surprise that he doesn't want.

    But Destiny has a plan for them.

     

    Inspired by Penny-anna's famous tumblr post.

    Updates every weekend.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,880
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    49
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    599
  20. Tags
    Summary

    She’d expected Jaskier’s death to be difficult on Geralt. Of course it would, the two had been attached at the hip for decades, they were best friends, lovers, tied together so deeply she wouldn’t begin to try and decipher it, just as he had stopped trying to decipher her and Geralt. What she hadn’t been expecting was the loss to be such a blow to herself.

    But that was death, wasn’t it? Knocking your breath away as someone else loses theirs. If he couldn’t breathe it, what use was air at all?

    It was a stupid thought. But it lingered in her nonetheless.

    -x-

    Jaskier, painfully human as he was, had passed of old age nearly a year ago. They'd grieved. Yennefer had thought they would have moved on by now-- but Geralt has been staring at something in their study, and Corvo Bianco has felt so heavy, and Yennefer is going to drag this out of him, if she has to. And she's not going to cry about the bard in the meantime. She's not.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,896
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    82
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    436

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