Humans are space orcs
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That one alien AU absolutely no one asked for but here it is anyways (dedicated to Audio and WebKat for giving me the idea).
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Sehmal and his fellow 'guards' were hand selected. Mainly for their ability to be surprised or alarmed without going into shock and dying. Secondarily because they had no bonded partners to distress if they died anyways. And only lastly because they studied aliens.He just wished he'd been told before volunteering for this expedition that it was for the study of humans.
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After a crash Private Taufav and Bloodsworth have to survive a planet together with vastly different needs.
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Nolo didn't understand why they had to take a human on their mission.
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A new species has joined the Galactic Federation, and that means everything has to be updated. Chief Medical Officer Glit has decided that he needs to take this opportunity to get hands on experience with Terrans to better understand their health.
And Warrant Officer Smith is more than willing to cooperate in this matter.
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Ravager's Inferno by FireChildSlytherin5
Fandoms: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Guardians of the Galaxy - All Media Types, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
31 Jul 2017
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Summary
When Peter Quill first met Stakar Ogord he never thought his life would change again. What does he mean the 101th Ravager Clan? What happened at Terra? Peter learns that his home planet been very busy as of late and was thrust into new world of threats that may mean the end of all humankind. Team Guardians team up with Coulson's team to end Thanos Threat and make friends and enemies along the way.
Series
- Part 3 of Ravager's AU
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They were prepared for us, our terrain, our weather, and our wildlife. They never could have predicted the paranormal entities of earth.
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The "Graveyard Shift" was not one that anyone ever really wanted, but work is work, and work needs to be done.
When a noise complaint comes in Sialith has to see another side to humans he didn't expect.
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Humans are space orcs compilation by bubbelpop2
Fandoms: humans are weird - Fandom, humans are space orcs - Fandom
07 Feb 2018
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bunch of stuff from the humans are space orcs tag on tumblr. credits always there, don't comment without looking first.
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When Beyond The Portal by Bunnylover34
Fandoms: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
26 Sep 2019
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Summary
The portal closes before Tony can fall back through. As a result Tony is stuck in space. Thank goodness he was wearing his space suit that day. Really though he should get his Arc Reactor fixed before it gives out on him.
Or
Tony is found by the guardians and they have awesome space adventures.
(Previously called The Cookie Spaceship)
Series
- Part 2 of Stark in the Stars
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Summary
When the Tahw first visited the M314 solar system, they found potential sentient life on the third planet. That was millennia ago (well, by our timeframe) so it was about time for a recon mission. The Tahw are a plant-like species that function as a herd, so to find an intelligent predatory animal like the PIS1 on M314-P3 is particularly intriguing! Can an ecosystem even survive that? Or have they meanwhile eradicated themselves, like all the other sentient predators that they had encountered on previous missions?
As the Tahw mission team around matriarch T’hem advance further into the foreign solar system, and discover several non-natural objects on the way, they slowly learn that the PIS1 species has not only survived, but has advanced to an early space-exploration stage of development. What implications does that have? Is a first contact inevitable? Can they be won over as allies, or is their aggressive, territorial instinct stronger than intelligence and scientific curiosity? How do you even talk to a predator? And what shape will the planet be in when they arrive? They can only speculate...OR
The answer to the question: If aliens visited us now, what would they think of us?
Series
- Part 1 of Sentient Predators
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"The years 1.11.1100 to 1.11.1180 Galactic Standard (2050-2130 AD) were tumultuous for many species, marked by war recovery, economic turmoil, an expanding Alliance, and the integration of humanity, formerly involved only in a mercenary capacity, into galactic civilian sectors. One can only imagine what it must have been like living in such uncertain times..."
Hsst'nna Kannannissi Ullohs, "A Galactic Citizen's History of the Alignment Era," written in the Season of Third Crystal, Fifth Reckoning.
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(Or: Two humans with a dangerous secret make their way into the civilian sectors of the galaxy. Problems ensue.)
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Ever since Sam was little the urge to explore had tugged at her feet and it had led her all the way to space, further than possibly any human had gone before. When she stumbles across a kid in a Galra escape pod what else would she do but help them return to their pseudo-family in their giant floating castle ship, where they apparently fly huge robotic lions. Yeah, that should alleviate the boredom for a while.
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Folklore from Beyond The Horizon by ThatsMyJam (PaulAtreDeezNuts)
Fandoms: Original Work, space orcs, Earth is space Australia - Fandom
07 Jul 2018
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Stabby gets into hijinks.
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A story I wrote for tumblr, moving it here. It's about awesome humans and awesome aliens.
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My It's a Small Universe tag from Tumblr. It's getting a bit bulky to link to individual posts so I'm moving it here.
The story of how certain aliens react to meeting the Deathworlders -
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Based off the tumblr posts, set in the Voltron universe. Group of one-shots.
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Jason’s got a reputation for being daring and reckless, and as part of the Explorations Away team for the SS Gotham of the Galactic Alliance, it’s well deserved. So, it makes total sense when he declares that he’ll be the first one on the ship to fuck an alien.
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Blue and Yellow learn why humanity is the apex predator on Earth.
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Intelligent life in space encounters humans for the first time, but eventually it is only known as a good story. Is it though? Are those beings that are watching from up above only stories? Or are they very much real?
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years after the humans joined the Alliance, a threat emerges that nobody else can solve, there is only one thing left to try.
Series
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Bookmarks which have used it as a tag:
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My It's a Small Universe tag from Tumblr. It's getting a bit bulky to link to individual posts so I'm moving it here.
The story of how certain aliens react to meeting the Deathworlders -
Earth is Space Australia by undercover_chicken
Fandoms: Justice League - All Media Types, Green Lantern (Comics), Young Justice (Cartoon)
16 Sep 2017
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Green Lantern Hal Jordan finally finds out why Earth has so many alien invasions.
Series
- Part 1 of DC Earth is Space Australia
Bookmarked by summer164
13 Oct 2019
Bookmarker's Tags:
Bookmarker's Notes
The first thing that Hal utters when the next League council meeting is called is “Earth is Space Australia.”
“I’m sorry, I do not understand,” Wonder Woman says, while the rest of the Leaguers look at him in confusion.
“The Lantern Corps as a whole considers Earth a ‘death world’ for almost all other alien life. No one wants our backwoods, worthless shithole planet,” Hal says.
“That can’t be true. If our planet is so terrible and worthless, why are there so many alien invasions and extraterrestrial threats? Why would our sector have four Green Lanterns?” Superman demands.
“Because we’re Space Australia. The Corps sends the threats they don’t want here because they’ll either get wiped out by an earthquake or chicken pox or something. And if that doesn’t get them, they’ll get mauled by a badger or eaten by a giant snake or stung to death by bees or something.”
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The paladins hadn't been expecting to find the baby
Allura hadn't been expecting their reaction to it
Series
- Part 1 of Please Explain
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Peter may not be strong, or fast, or genius smart. But he grew up on one of the harshest planets in the galaxy, and has the endurance to prove it.
Or. Planet Earth is practically a death sentence for almost any galactic race and human biology is badass.
Chapter 1 - Extreme Omnivore
Chapter 2 - Regeneration
Chapter 3 - A matter of Taste
Chapter 4 - Sunbathing
Chapter 5 - Pitch and Tone
Chapter 6 - Paper Moon
Chapter 7 - hiatus -
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Gamzee finds himself on Earth. It's... difficult.
Series
- Part 9 of Happy Endings
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"You need food, Rocket. Worse than me. A hell of a lot worse than me, and I'm worried about you. We have water, neither of us are hurt, but both of us will die eventually if we don't eat. And I can hunt down one of those," he said, pointing off into the distance at a four-legged ungulate of some kind, grazing on the tough grass.
"Neither of us have any weapons, genius. You're gonna just run up to it and crack it on the head with a rock?"
"No," Peter said. "I'm gonna run it down and slit its throat."
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Nolo didn't understand why they had to take a human on their mission.
- Language:
- English
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- 7,465
- Chapters:
- 7/8
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- 1
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Bookmarked by summer164
13 Oct 2019
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Bookmarker's Notes
On ch 8
Cb 1 Maternal rage
Ch3. Crying over a cookiwCh 5 Big bird
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Summary
The Tahw have now arrived at Earth (or Terra, as they have decided to call it). It was only supposed to be a purely observational mission – first contact wasn’t planned, but has been rendered inevitable. So they are now forced not only to adapt and improvise, but also have to somehow learn to communicate with these strange predatory beings who seem to act so against their own better judgement (pollution and overdominance are only the tip of the iceberg). Learning the language is one thing, but really understanding will be the far greater task. And then there’s this other looming threat...
Series
- Part 2 of Sentient Predators
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Tags
Summary
When the Tahw first visited the M314 solar system, they found potential sentient life on the third planet. That was millennia ago (well, by our timeframe) so it was about time for a recon mission. The Tahw are a plant-like species that function as a herd, so to find an intelligent predatory animal like the PIS1 on M314-P3 is particularly intriguing! Can an ecosystem even survive that? Or have they meanwhile eradicated themselves, like all the other sentient predators that they had encountered on previous missions?
As the Tahw mission team around matriarch T’hem advance further into the foreign solar system, and discover several non-natural objects on the way, they slowly learn that the PIS1 species has not only survived, but has advanced to an early space-exploration stage of development. What implications does that have? Is a first contact inevitable? Can they be won over as allies, or is their aggressive, territorial instinct stronger than intelligence and scientific curiosity? How do you even talk to a predator? And what shape will the planet be in when they arrive? They can only speculate...OR
The answer to the question: If aliens visited us now, what would they think of us?
Series
- Part 1 of Sentient Predators
-
When Beyond The Portal by Bunnylover34
Fandoms: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
26 Sep 2019
Tags
Summary
The portal closes before Tony can fall back through. As a result Tony is stuck in space. Thank goodness he was wearing his space suit that day. Really though he should get his Arc Reactor fixed before it gives out on him.
Or
Tony is found by the guardians and they have awesome space adventures.
(Previously called The Cookie Spaceship)
Series
- Part 2 of Stark in the Stars
-
Tags
Summary
Short stories about humans on the galactic scene, some from alien points of view and others about these mythical tiny juggernauts. Brought over from tumblr and added to when possible.
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Tags
Summary
A new species has joined the Galactic Federation, and that means everything has to be updated. Chief Medical Officer Glit has decided that he needs to take this opportunity to get hands on experience with Terrans to better understand their health.
And Warrant Officer Smith is more than willing to cooperate in this matter.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,721
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 14
- Kudos:
- 858
- Bookmarks:
- 96
- Hits:
- 11274
Bookmarked by summer164
13 Oct 2019
Bookmarker's Tags:
Bookmarker's Notes
Before that I was hospitalized because of my appendix, that was a whole ordeal.”
“What exactly...” he paused, trying to hide the shock in his voice “Happened?”
“Oh, it exploded” She said as if she were commenting on the weather “I thought it was just menstrual cramps and ignored it.”
He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. How can one just? Ignore an organ exploding? And how does one misattribute the pain that goes with that to menstrual cramps? Everything he ever read said that the pain that those who menstruate is minimal if present at all.
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Tags
Summary
years after the humans joined the Alliance, a threat emerges that nobody else can solve, there is only one thing left to try.
Series
-
Tags
Summary
My It's a Small Universe tag from Tumblr. It's getting a bit bulky to link to individual posts so I'm moving it here.
The story of how certain aliens react to meeting the Deathworlders -
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Summary
Abducted by smugglers, Patton finds himself stuck in a cell with one of the most famous and bloodthirsty kind of deathworlders out there, a Human.
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Summary
Abducted by smugglers, Patton finds himself stuck in a cell with one of the most famous and bloodthirsty kind of deathworlders out there, a Human.
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Humans are space orcs compilation by bubbelpop2
Fandoms: humans are weird - Fandom, humans are space orcs - Fandom
07 Feb 2018
Tags
Summary
bunch of stuff from the humans are space orcs tag on tumblr. credits always there, don't comment without looking first.
Bookmarked by summer164
13 Oct 2019
Bookmarker's Tags:
Bookmarker's Notes
On ch 8
Ch 1 I deeply pity the alien anthropologist (xenologist?) or linguist charged with understanding not just human languages but human coloquialisms. Looking at English alone, there are a million random idiosyncrasies. For example, you can play the “Am I Agreeing or Disagreeing” game:
—Sometimes using two negatives equals a negative (“I don’t want to go nowhere!”) but then sometimes using just one does as well (“I don’t want to go anywhere!”)
—Sometimes, a negative and a positive can be combined to equal a negative (“Yeah no.”)
—Sometimes two positives together equal a negative (“Yeah, right.”)
—And sometimes an elongated positive is used to suggest negativity and scepticism (“Riiiiiight…”)
universe: okay, you’re a human. I gave you free will and a conscious mind, so you’re free to do whatever you want. So what do you wanna do?
human: GO FAST
the universe: well, you’re a perfect pursuit predator but if that’s the way you want to evolve, go ahead.
human, climbing on a horse: GO FAST
the universe: wait what
human, inventing the carriage, the car and the bullet train: GO FASTER
the universe: I IMPLORE YOU TO STOP
human, trying to figure out lightspeed travel: FAS
Ch 2
Once they’ve all finished talking about their own planets, everybody turns to the humans and asks them what Earth is like. They’re only doing it to be polite though. They haven’t heard much about humans (except the usual stories, and only fledglings believe in those) and they can’t really believe that these fleshy bald looking things come from anywhere even remotely as interesting as their own planets. -
The Rabbit in The Moon - Drabble's, Snippets, and One shot's by Dhar_Sii
Fandoms: Naruto
12 Oct 2019
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A bunch of random Ideas and shorts centering around our favorite Albino Senju. Updates will be random, just a forewarning.
Bookmarked by summer164
13 Oct 2019
Bookmarker's Tags:
Bookmarker's Notes
Ch 4 Huamsn ar3 soac3 orcs
Aliens -
what can they do but burn? by Aryadrutting
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
28 Jun 2019
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Summary
Tony has been building impossible things since his birth.
What's one more miracle?
Or humanity and the stones are connected and Thanos should really listen to them.
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Tags
Summary
My It's a Small Universe tag from Tumblr. It's getting a bit bulky to link to individual posts so I'm moving it here.
The story of how certain aliens react to meeting the Deathworlders