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doordash for energy vampires by killerqueer
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
02 Jan 2024
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While trying to investigate The Three Sisters mountain range in Oregon for signs of Bigfoot on behalf of an eccentric forest ranger, Dirk, Todd, and Farah discover The Rowdy Three's van abandoned at the foot of the North Sister.
feat. a "borrowed" (stolen) Tesla that dies almost immediately, Todd and Farah harassing each other about their respective crushes, and Dirk sacrificing himself on the altar of The Rowdy Three's ravenous appetites.
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The agency celebrates the holidays (a series of 12 semi-connected ficlets about life, love, and the pursuit of the perfect present).
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The woman spreads out her hands. “Goblins don’t lie,” she says. “Where’s the fun in that? This potion will lift all enchantments laid on you, present and future. Do you want it, or not?”
Farah doesn't even hesitate.
When Farah takes a potion to render herself immune to enchantment, her magical troubles should be over for good. But when she starts remembering kissing Tina, she fears there's more to the potion than advertised.
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Leaves (On The Stream Of Creation) by WhileITryToBreathe
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
06 Nov 2023
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Things that get me through writers block.
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we are so lonely in this part of town (pour que l'orage s'annonce) by Evanaissante
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
07 Oct 2023
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“Well, that’s sinister, isn’t it?” Dirk breathes out, “I mean, a mysterious door at the end of a dark corridor at a crime scene? That doesn’t make me feel very safe.”
“Safe isn’t a word I would associate to what we do,” Todd laughs.
It starts with Bart, an empty Capri-Sun and the warning that the Universe wants to kill Dirk's best friend.
It ends with said best friend getting shot and suits made of human skin. -
Five Weeks Later: Part 2 by Lobsterling
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
25 Aug 2023
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Dirk and Todd (formerly Ikariel and Toad) are an angel and demon living on earth to avoid the bureaucracy and stress of their respective headquarters. Their time on Earth, though occasionally fraught, is precious to them – and when the antichrist arrives to signal the End Of It All, everything is thrown into chaos as they scramble to protect the world. But even when that's over, Dirk still has a crawling hunch that they aren't safe yet...
Part 2!
Series
- Part 2 of Five Weeks Later
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When life gives you lemons (make lemon squares) by agent_p_94
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
26 Jul 2023
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Tina surveyed him over two more bites of the chocolate donut. “Say it,” she said.
“You told me not to comment.”
“Say it,” Tina demanded.
“I was just gonna say,” said Hobbs, raising his voice over Tina’s attempted threats, “that if it was Farah, you wouldn’t be humming. You’d be singing.”
Tina and Farah had their chance, and Tina blew it - or so she thinks. But when Farah unexpectedly reaches out, Tina has a chance to try again.
Series
- Part 2 of Where I Intend to Go
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Dungeons & Dirk by snapdragonfairy
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
10 Jul 2023
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The detective agency is invited by Tina to play a game of D&D. It doesn't go exactly as planned.
(Art by @ firebloodmayhemred on Tumblr!)
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Short fics and deleted scenes just for fun. Most originally posted as one-shots on Tumblr.
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isn't music boring lately? by binarystarkillers for urlocallesbiab
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
02 Feb 2023
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(15:33) and yeah we invited bart to come w/ us. she might be covered in blood but she seems pretty sad :(
(15:34) Todd asked if you were on drugs and I’m inclined to back that question
(15:34) :) hurry please she smells bad
Series
- Part 2 of lousy connection
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The Trouble With Mistletoe by bookwhimses
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
06 Jan 2023
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"What Dirk lacked in personal memories of an Actual Proper Christmas, he made up for with an enthusiastic and almost encyclopaedic knowledge of the ins and outs of the holiday as it had been celebrated in the Western world. At one point in his life, he had voraciously devoured every piece of Christmassy information he could find. And of all the Christmas traditions that Dirk had researched, none had managed to fascinate him in quite the same way as mistletoe."
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It's less than two months after Bergsberg and Blackwing, and Dirk is determined to make his first Christmas with Todd and Farah as festive as possible. However, he quickly becomes side-tracked by one particular whim: catching Todd under the mistletoe. It shouldn't be that complicated, right? Put up mistletoe, wait for opportunity to strike. Easy and simple. Except that mistletoe proves to be less than easy and never simple, and what starts off as curiosity spirals towards disaster. And Dirk really isn't sure how to feel about the fact that the Universe itself seems to be thwarting his every move.
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Как об стенку by 1ofthefreaks2
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
10 Dec 2022
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Тодд, как ни старался, не мог разгадать: Дирку действительно всё это настолько по барабану, или он блестяще делает вид? Зная Дирка, с одинаковым успехом могло быть и то, и то.
Series
- Part 2 of "Отвлекающий манёвр" + "Как об стенку"
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On herbal blends and healing by agent_p_94
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
09 Dec 2022
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The problem, as Dirk allowed himself to admit, since it was his birthday, was that he was quite hopelessly in love with Todd. He’d made his feelings rather clear on the subject by attempting to kiss Todd on a park bench, but Todd had postponed any reciprocity till after he’d “taken care of some things,” and since those “things” had precipitated a massive argument with Dirk, they had never actually got back round to the initial subject.
Which was fine. Dirk could be patient.
Todd leaned over another round of mugs, his hair falling into his eyes, and the sunlight shining through the window spotlit highlights in his wavy brown hair.
Patience, it turned out, was hard work.
Dirk has found friends, home, family, and even the possibility of romance. But despite everything he's gained, his past can't be so easily shaken...
Series
- Part 2 of On love and latte art
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Тодд вопросительно приподнял бровь:
- То есть за дверью меня ждет что-то такое, что выходит за рамки обычного, а я должен подмахнуться на это, не глядя? Тупо, потому что это твое желание, Дирк?! Так, что ли?
- Верно рубишь! - Тина радостно заржала и похлопала его по плечу- Language:
- Русский
- Words:
- 14,421
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 23
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they are only words by binarystarkillers for LegQlas
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
06 Nov 2022
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To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: ComplaintsHi Todd,
Can you please walk Dirk through how to send a proper email? He’s managing the work one and he won’t stop scaring people off by writing essays about holistic-ness when they email about questions.
Thanks,
FarahSeries
- Part 1 of lousy connection
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Thats Your Best Friend by thelocaldogooder
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
05 Jun 2022
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5 times Dirk calls Todd his friend, and 1 time Todd calls him something else
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In This Town We Call Home by TriffidsandCuckoos
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
03 Nov 2021
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Farah pays a visit to Bergsberg to avoid the chaos of an Agency Halloween. Hobbs has far too many stories about past Halloweens that he is far too calm about, while Tina is extremely happy to offer Farah alternative plans for the holiday.
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Todd's suffering. Luckily, Dirk knows how to make him feel better.
Series
- Part 29 of Hurricane
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 375
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 7
- Hits:
- 72
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In which a certain loving bear, named Sherlock Hobbs, joins the polycule.
Series
- Part 26 of Hurricane
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Dirk Gently and The Waking Sea of Reality by Sacred_Algae
Fandoms: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
19 May 2021
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It's been four months since Dirk solved the Oneiroi case and human existence, (yes, Dirk solved the case of human existence) and they were beginning to get used to the idea of maybe, possibly, living a normal life. Not that they wanted that, of course. But they had stopped Blackwing so maybe the universe was fixed and no more weird stuff would happen...
Wrong!
Get ready for a tale of goats, a boat, drugs, and lots of other random stuff. I told you this one was weird.
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