1 - 20 of 133 Works in Dean Winchester Has Abandonment Issues

Pages Navigation

Listing Works

  1. Tags
    Summary

    Cas was resurrected. Dean told Cas that he loves him, that he can have everything he wanted, but Cas has to stay with him. Cas promised that he would. The thing is, he didn’t realize how literal Dean was being.

    Now, Cas works on rebuilding Heaven with the angels, while he builds a new life with Dean. Neither of those things are as easy as Cas would have liked.

    *

    “Angels have been interfering for too long,” Jack insists. “Humanity deserves some peace, and I intend to give it to them.”

    “Then why did Cas go back?” Anna demands.

    “That doesn’t matter,” Cas says, willing Anna to just let it go.

    “Yes it does!” she argues instead.

    “And Heaven deserves some peace too!” Jack continues, raising his voice. “That won’t happen if we’re getting into conflicts on Earth.”

    “Then why does Cas get to go back and I don’t?”

    “That’s different,” Jack says. Cas cringes.

    “Why, because it’s the Winchesters?” Anna asks. “The old God is dead, why are they still the centre of the universe?”

    “Because it’s Dean,” Cas says.

    “And?!”

    “And I love him!”

    "It's still not fair. You can't set up rules and exceptions and call Heaven free."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    55,352
    Chapters:
    5/8
    Comments:
    123
    Kudos:
    188
    Bookmarks:
    41
    Hits:
    3886
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Castiel Shurley, pen name Castiel Novak, was once a confessional poetry wunderkind. Now, though, he’s 34 and hasn’t published a new collection in almost seven years. He can bemoan the vagaries of writer’s block and the challenges of parenting a teenage son while teaching full-time all he wants, but excuses aren’t going to impress his agent, his publisher, or his tenure committee. He’s in serious danger of becoming a washed-up literary fluke before even seeing middle age.

    At the end of his rope, Castiel repairs to his sister Anna’s vacation home on Lake Pend Oreille, hoping a change of scenery will ungum his creative works. On one of their first trips into town, Jack strikes up a conversation in the parking lot of the local grocery store with the most beautiful man Castiel has ever seen, and that’s when Castiel feels it: his muse coming back after a half-decade of dormancy.

    No matter what, he has to see this man again somehow. Too bad he has no idea who he is.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,073
    Chapters:
    7/14
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    85
    Kudos:
    169
    Bookmarks:
    50
    Hits:
    3230
  3. Tags
    Summary

    After the dust settles, and Chuck is finally defeated, and Jack just leaves them after getting the job done, Dean is stuck with the revelation that he's all alone and that he was a massive asshole to everyone in his life who was just doing their best to help him.

    Cue Dean aggressively trying to make up for his actions and doing whatever he can to try to be the selfless person Cas thought he was, even though he knows that he wasn't. These attempts at becoming the kind of person Cas would be proud of include becoming a mechanic, quitting hunting, taking good care of his dog, volunteering at the homeless shelter, and even, god forbid, quitting alcohol. The one thing Dean just can't seem to quit is his weird inability to move on from Cas, even though Cas probably would've wanted him to do that too.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,113
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    50
    Kudos:
    80
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    1412
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Cas is keeping something from Dean. Dean is determined to find out what it is (even if he truly doesn't want to know...)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,538
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    75
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    378
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Castiel Krushnic is the weirdest guy in the 11th grade. Hell, he’s the weirdest guy in the whole damn school. His stark good looks against the all black clothes, his thick-soled stomping boots, and the fact that he almost never speaks to anyone except his girlfriend Meg makes him an enigma. It seems like every time Dean turns around, the guy is there—looking at him or doing something bizarre. Dean shouldn’t care, but he can’t get Castiel out of his head.

    As spring comes to Sioux Falls and the days get longer, 17-year-old Dean Winchester has more time to spend with his semi-girlfriend Lisa and collection of delinquent friends. Between working at his Uncle Bobby’s garage and shuttling his little brother around in his prized possession, his father’s Impala, time alone is a rare luxury. When he treks out to an abandoned trainyard alone and ends up seriously injured, it shouldn’t be a surprise that Castiel is there to save him.

    Now, Dean has one more weird thing about Castiel Krushnic he can’t explain and a gnawing need to know more.

    AUTHORS NOTE: I hope to update this story at least 2ce a week.
    AUTHORS NOTE: Special thanks to the_communist_unicorn, WingsUnbound, and Masonic-You know what you did

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    178,143
    Chapters:
    29/?
    Comments:
    205
    Kudos:
    300
    Bookmarks:
    66
    Hits:
    9925
  6. Tags
    Summary

    This was the moment when their lives were supposed to begin, and instead it was all over before it even started.

    Dean has lost track of time, it could be days, weeks or months since they defeated Chuck. He doesn't know, and he doesn't care.

    Sam was patient at first, sat by his side in bed and talked softly, helped him to the bathroom when Dean was too drunk to stand on his own two feet, and brought him water to dilute the alcohol in his bloodstream.

    When that didn't help, he became desperate, he yelled at him, anything to get some kind of reaction. Now it's the silent treatment, the last thing Sam said was that he won't be around to see Dean slowly kill himself.

    And that's fine, he shouldn't, because everyone Dean loves and cares about gets killed or worse.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,454
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    64
    Kudos:
    121
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    1892
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Dean doesn’t know what to do. Dean wants to say stay with me, stay with me and never leave. Dean wants to apologize. Dean wants to set his mouth at the hollow of Cas’s throat as gently as he’s ever done anything, feel the beat of Cas’s heart beneath his lips. Dean is so lonely, and he’s missed him so much.

    *

    A year and a half after Cas is saved from the Empty, Dean is living out his days alone on a piece of farmland in rural Kansas. One day, Cas shows up on his porch.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,385
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    327
    Kudos:
    765
    Bookmarks:
    210
    Hits:
    12952
  8. Tags
    Summary

    This story is set in season one and starts directly after the events in episode 13 “Route 666” and is loosely canon compliant.
    Both boys are dealing with their feelings.
    Sam left for Stanford and ignored every call from his brother for four years, because he was deeply in love with him and afraid Dean would hate him if he ever finds out.
    Dean is hurt to the core, alone and convinced his family abandoned him. But then John disappears without a trace. Dean gets Sam and they are looking for their Dad, who’s still missing, but of course other things happen.
    They get involved in a case of missing people, Sam gets kidnapped and Dean needs to find his brother urgently.
    This might sound like the plot of “The Benders”.
    And it has definitely a lot of elements from that episode in it, but of course we don’t want to retell the story you all already know.
    This is our own take on what happened after they left Cassie behind.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    62,831
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Comments:
    82
    Kudos:
    54
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1396
  9. Tags
    Summary

    And finally, Dean thought about Cas.

    What it would all mean to have Cas in his entirety, in every way imaginable. To have him sleep caressed and sun-kissed beneath early morning sheets, the weight of his fingers tracing Dean’s palm down peaceful corridors, his scent cloaked in Dean’s very bones. To have his warmth as comfort and his hands as a guide that slid over Dean’s skin with familiarity. No more tentativeness, no more skimming the edges and tracing the seams of their story.

    Peace. He wanted peace. But with Cas back from the Empty with his memories shredded, and Jack nowhere to be seen, what would peace even look like? And, after everything, was it something Dean deserved?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    65,328
    Chapters:
    5/6
    Comments:
    106
    Kudos:
    267
    Bookmarks:
    86
    Hits:
    4734
  10. Tags
    Summary

    "All of his sorrow won't fit in his chest
    It just burns like a fire in the pit of his chest
    And his heart is a bird on a spit in his chest
    How long, how long, how long?"
    - Persephone (Hadestown)
    ---
    Dean hasn't seen or heard from his family in over a year. After one too many ignored phone calls, Dean decides he's better off dead than alone. Bobby disagrees.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,306
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    115
    Kudos:
    218
    Bookmarks:
    53
    Hits:
    2752
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “You saved me,” Cas says.

    Dean wants to crawl inside that low rumble of a voice and curl up there forever. Delirious, he says, “Yes.”

    Then Cas says, “You kissed me.”

    Dean swallows. “And?”

    Cas kisses him. Something burns at the hem of Dean’s shirt and his eyelashes flutter darker and it’s much, much later when he realizes he’d felt a spark from the lightbulbs blowing out.

    *

    Dean barely talks since Cas died. Even once they save him, it's too damn hard. In which fucked up coping styles leave both Cas and Dean convinced the other doesn't really love them. Cas thinks Dean is offering to sleep with him out of the goodness of his heart, or so Cas won't leave. Dean is trying to be less of a dick and ends up crying all the time. Cas just wants Dean to let him be the big spoon. They get to heal and be in love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,096
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    487
    Bookmarks:
    75
    Hits:
    5543
  12. Tags
    Summary

    It’s usually Cas who asks for this by name—asks to be tied down to the bed they share, asks to be kissed and touched and fucked until Dean’s satisfied. Until they both are.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,326
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    142
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1056
  13. Tags
    Summary

    The thing about kissing Cas is, it burns.

    ---

    post finale, explores Dean and Cas's navigation of a romantic relationship.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,293
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    105
    Kudos:
    141
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    2560
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Jack heals Castiel's wings.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,449
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    78
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    398
  15. Tags
    Summary

    “Hm.” Nicky’s clearly dissatisfied with that answer. “So no mentions of immortality at all? What about other gods? Pre-Abrahamic religions?”

    “Habibi,” Joe says, resting a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t overwhelm them.”

    Sam starts answering, talking about Gabriel double-timing as Loki, all the other gods they’ve met, the theological implications of one god creating many others, angels impersonating other gods, and Dean almost cares, but he can’t hear any of it. It’s white noise, blood rushing in his ears, all he can see is the slow caress of Joe’s thumb on Nicky’s shoulder, Nicky’s hand coming up to clasp at Joe’s.

    OR: Sam and Dean meet the Old Guard. It awakens a few things in Dean.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,454
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    290
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    1551
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Dean knows that he doesn’t need to understand it. You don’t need to understand why someone needs something when you love them as much as Dean loves his father.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,232
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    40
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    906
  17. Tags
    Summary

    In a world where the name of your soulmates appears on the body on your 18th birthday and turns into a red circle the moment a bond is formed, Dean is an absolute wreck. Because he knows who his soulmate is and it's not someone he ever imagined it to be. In a world, where the name of your soulmate appears on your body on your 18th birthday, Sam is confused because his body bears a red circle on his heart which means he's already bonded to his soulmate. In a world where the name of your soulmate appears on your body on your 18th birthday, there are two idiots who forgot that soul bonds are a match made by destiny and can't be changed.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,884
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    318
    Bookmarks:
    38
    Hits:
    871
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Cas moves into the bunker as his powers start to fail. Dean doesn’t know if the arrangement is as permanent as he wants it to be. He's also not sure why he keeps dreaming about his friend. All he knows is that he wants Cas to stay.

    Overall warnings: canon-typical miscommunication & Dean having self-hatred issues.

    Now complete!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,939
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    145
    Kudos:
    357
    Bookmarks:
    94
    Hits:
    5813
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Based on this prompt:

    "I've always wondered how Dean dug himself out of his grave in 4x01. Did he know how to do it beforehand? I present to you this: don't think about a young Dean having to learn how to dig himself out of a grave. Don't think about John threatening to bury him, and then actually doing it so he can 'learn to be a man.' Don't think about Dean crying and asking for help and still doing it because all he wants to do is please his father."

    Well... I thought about it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,951
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    85
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    578
  20. Tags
    Summary

    As a parting gift following her unification with Jack, Amara sends Sam and Dean on a journey through the past to face the darkness in themselves and their relationship.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,610
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    681

Filters

Filter results:
Submit

Include

?
Include Ratings
Include Warnings
Include Categories
Include Fandoms
Include Characters
Include Relationships
Include Additional Tags

Exclude

?
Exclude Ratings
Exclude Warnings
Exclude Categories
Exclude Fandoms
Exclude Characters
Exclude Relationships
Exclude Additional Tags

More Options

Crossovers
Completion Status
Word Count
Date Updated
Submit

Pages Navigation