17 Works in Caliborn (Homestuck) Being an Asshole

Listing Works

  1. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk Strider is in over his head. Maybe he's always been in over his head. Maybe becoming engaged to the nephew of a mob boss was a bad idea. Maybe angering the son of a mob boss was a bad idea. Not that he knew any of that. Maybe joining the family is the next logical step.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,802
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    267
  2. Tags
    Summary

    The Rebellion AU from the Vantas side of things

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,245
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    129
    Kudos:
    67
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1200
  3. Tags
    Summary

    A large group of internet friends from across the group. Some of them might have a criminal record. Several of them have relationships that, if fully realized, could lead to an explosive reaction as destructive as several bombs going off. None of them have very long fuses.

    They're all going to meet up over winter break.

    Vriska and Terezi have a past, with an uncomfortably high body count.
    Dave and Karkat seem to have made it a life's mission to get on each other's nerves.
    Rose and Kanaya get along great online, but will they be able to translate their chemistry from words into actions?
    Roxy and Jane want to save Calliope from her abusive brother, but they don't know just how dangerous her family is.
    Dirk and Jake, aka two teenaged boys who probably couldn't communicate their true feelings to save their lives.
    But don't worry. They've totally got this situation under control.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,796
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    101
    Kudos:
    100
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1568
  4. Tags
    Summary

    The plan: Get in, draw English out into the open, get him arrested if you can. Not the best of plans, but still easy to screw up.

    Your name is Erik and it used to be Eridan and you have no fucking clue how this is going to go.

    Your name is Nessa and they all had decided you were too young to be heavily involved in the fighting.

    ==> BE SOMEONE ELSE

    Jesus Christ, you think as you cuff blood awkwardly from the cut on your forehead. Could this get any worse?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,495
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    280
  5. Tags
    Summary

    “Oh, hey, it’s Strider! And what looks like a little Strider..?” He raised an eyebrow and flashed a grin. Dirk seemed at a loss of words and Dave was ready to abscond with him, but he seemed more flustered than afraid.

    “John, it’s nice seeing you, but I have to get my brother to class.” Dirk managed to say, trying to move past him. John immediately grabbed his shoulders and grinned.

    “No way! Jake has got to see this little twink. Hey, Jake!” He called, and while Dirk’s cheeks were starting to turn pink, he didn’t look happy at Dave being called a twink.

    “Well, if it isn’t the cutie who was staring.” Oh fuck no, that same hot guy from earlier was standing in front of Dave, his emerald eyes amused. The blond’s cheeks flushed darkly and he directed his gaze to the ground, embarrassed.

    x

    Douchestuck.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,388
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    560
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Your name, is Dirk Strider. And as far as you're concerned, this is the beginning of the end of your life.

    With bags full of only what your parents allowed you to take, a fixed gaze and a heavy heart, you look upon the place that would be your new residence for the next few years of your life. Sburb institutions, an institution for the mentally unstable and unfit for society. This was so not ironic.

    In which Dirk goes to the Mental ward called Sburb Institution and meets friends, and enemies and crazy people.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    60,747
    Chapters:
    17/?
    Comments:
    108
    Kudos:
    335
    Bookmarks:
    47
    Hits:
    5177
  7. Tags
    Summary

    He was the nerdy kid, he was the cool kid. They meet, let's see what happens.
     
    Lame description I know.

     

    Not a songfic

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,041
    Chapters:
    37/37
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    36
    Hits:
    1047
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Your name is Jane Crocker and your father was recently promoted. Normally that would be cause for celebration, but in order to obtain the promotion you must be uprooted from your home state of Washington to move to the state of Texas. The move could be a chance for a new start or it could be the cause for destruction of your precariously built walls of confidence. Only time will tell, but perhaps this new start will prove to be good for you.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,016
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    128
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1512
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Turning sixteen was supposed to be simple for John. He would dream of his soulmate (probably Vriska) and then he would be happy with her. He didn't count on dreaming of a boy who was who-knows-where. He didn't count on the political shift the country would be going through. He definitely didn't count on worrying whether or not his dad would come home alive. And when your soulmate is hurting himself but you have no way to reach him?

    God damn it! Since when was turning sixteen so complicated?!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,222
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    133
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    1444
  10. Tags
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    714
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    4
    Hits:
    78
  11. Tags
    Summary

    When the offer of himself had been accepted by the barbarian usurper, his father had told him he was lucky. This way, at least, he would maintain his 'royal birthright'. Never before had the young prince wanted to hit him so badly. His birthright was to be king, not some brawny oaf's glorified plaything.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,046
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    568
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Karkat doesn't notice for months--and by the time he does, the damage is done. The only thing left to do is put together the places his best friend is broken, in any way he can.

    Kink Meme Prompt: Highschool AU - Karkat notices the silent cries for help in his best friend's art, and discovers that Caliborn English's bullying goes way beyond physical violence. Focus on aftermath and emotional effects.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,180
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    121
    Kudos:
    510
    Bookmarks:
    131
    Hits:
    8556
  13. Tags
    Summary

    It's been six years since Karkat's parents died-murdered in cold blood. He would have lost his life that night, but he was saved by a mysterious boy with strange powers. He never forgot about him. Now, a new kid moved into town and has become Karkat's friend. Something seems...weird about him, but Karkat isn't sure what.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    40,696
    Chapters:
    34/34
    Comments:
    79
    Kudos:
    171
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    2649
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk's boyfriend has just died two months ago in a brutal car crash, and the aftermath is making Strider lose his apathetic mask. The fact is that he's also broken both his shoulders, and he has to go to physical therapy for three months more. Not at all helping the situation is the unbelievably hot personal trainer assigned to him, who constantly pokes fun at him and flirts. Dirk is quite obviously thrown for a loop by this guy, and something begins to form between them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,227
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    40
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    652
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Aka Zack Becomes Rather Disturbed by How Much Crack He Ships

    --

    You would rather not. You would rather stay in the oblivious state you'd been in before. You would much rather still believe that this night would be wonderful, beautiful, for you.

    You would rather rewind just a few moments and stay in that point of time forever.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,421
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    28
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    333
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Being a spy isn't nearly as fun as the movies make it seem

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,736
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    285
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Dirk gets an unexpected call in the morning. Caliborn gets some unexpected porn.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    806
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    58
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    884

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