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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Some people believed he was a seer or a prophet. Some people thought he was just crazy, Mad Baggins they called him. Really, Bilbo Baggins was just tired. Tired of pretending that every day was a new adventure. Tired of feigning surprise, ignorance and confusion. Tired of trying to make a difference. The truth was, after living the same life over and over again countless times, there were no new adventures, no surprises. No, it didn’t matter if he tried to change things because he always came back to live the same exact life all over again. No matter what changes he managed to make, it would all be reset again the moment he died. So was there really any point in trying? Despite all that, there was definitely something different going on this time . . or was there? After living the same life so many times, it was hard to distinguish the present life from the past ones sometimes. But he certainly couldn’t ever remember Thorin looking at him like that after walking through his door. Maybe there were a few more surprises left in store for him after all.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    68,537
    Chapters:
    21/?
    Comments:
    645
    Kudos:
    1670
    Bookmarks:
    503
    Hits:
    33145
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Here they are! Any of my "too short to post by themselves" ficlets and requests from tumblr/discord. This is all based around Thorin Oakenshield and/or Bagginshield. I hope you enjoy!

    Chapter 1: “Okay so maybe I didn’t see that coming.” **
    Chapter 2: “I should write a book.” (Follow up to chapter 1)
    Chapter 3: “If we’re all the burglar, though, then who will be the dragon!?”
    Chapter 4: “I know you don’t feel great, so let’s stay in today, okay?” **
    Chapter 5: "Your smile is beautiful. I want to see it more often..." **

     

    ** indicates request prompt

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,926
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    49
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    440
  3. Tags
    Summary

    The grandson of a greedy king and his dwarvish companions fall under the curse of literal dragon sickness - at least for Thorin. Bestowed by Smaug the Terrible, an enchanter whose other form is also that of a dragon, the vilest of fire drakes from the north, is seeking riches at the end of a hard trial for the prince of Erebor. Doomed to live his life as a ‘not-quite-dwarf’ and ‘not-quite-dragon’, Thorin and his companions are forgotten by the world around them.

    The decades roll by and the curse shows no sign of lifting, for Thorin was tasked with proving that his heart was worth saving and that he would not be corrupted by gold lust like his grandfather. All seems bleak until the arrival of one quirky little hobbit of the Shire with his mother’s stubborn streak and his father’s gentility. Bilbo Baggins, a prisoner of this draconic beast, soon begins to show Thorin just what a heart worth saving feels like.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,085
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    152
  4. Tags
    Summary

    “This is not the end, Dis.” Similar words had been spoken to him upon the Sack of Erebor, spoken by Thrain.

    It would not be the end. Thorin would not see his people suffer any longer than he could allow. Already he’d labored long and hard with work, where he could find it, but staying in Ered Luin would not feed his sister or the two mouths of his nephews. Family meant everything to him. His people meant everything to him. If helping them meant stepping out of the picture and aiding from afar, then so be it. He would do whatever it took, by any means necessary, to see them thrive once more.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,938
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    87
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    803
  5. Tags
    Summary

    "I must say, I am rather pleased that you remember me,” said Gandalf.
    “I never forget a face,” Bilbo joked, still entirely at ease. After several moment of silence, Bilbo opened his eyes to find Gandalf eyeing him quizzically. “Is something the matter?” he asked with a hint of annoyance. Why is it that he had not been dead for five minutes and this damned wizard was already causing a fuss.
    “That remains to be seen. I am looking for someone to share in an adventure.”
    “My dear friend, I am much too old now for adventures," Bilbo said with a laugh.

    OR:

    Yet another Time Travel fic in which Bilbo is very sad and a bit of a dick.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    70,858
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    181
    Kudos:
    520
    Bookmarks:
    139
    Hits:
    8017
  6. Tags
    Summary

    This thing started 4 years ago as a crack fic to amuse myself because honestly, dwarves are just ridiculous. As I returned to it after a long pause and it took an entirely different spin, a summary rewrite is a necessity.

    Bilbo Baggins had been touched by black magic. Her idle life in the Shire without any need to use her dark powers was turned upside down when Gandalf appeared at her doorstep to drag her yet again into trouble. But who wouldn't want to see a dragon? And the crownless king of dwarves wasn't so bad himself too. In hindsight, she should have just told the wizard to sod off.

    Thorin was quite ready to despise the newly acquired Company burglar, he was. Instead, he fell head over heels for her. Courting on the way to Erebor proves to be rather tricky when you're a directionally challenged jealous idiot and pretty much everyone ends up smitten with your One while literally nothing goes as planned.

    Throw in some dragon sickness angst, One Ring troubles, unexpected friendships and a lot of elves. Chaos ensues.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    201,695
    Chapters:
    28/?
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    220
    Kudos:
    738
    Bookmarks:
    273
    Hits:
    31972
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Belladonna Baggins is nearly 3 years past her majority and time is running out. If she doesn't find a husband soon she will loose not only her inheritance but Bag end and everything inside it as well. Just when she thinks she will have to settle for Bobby Bolger Gandalf shows up looking for a burglar.

    Dwarves won't let an unmarried female travel with them, and when Bella's cousin Fortinbras hears this he offers up a solution - have one of the Dwarves marry Bella, save her estate and she can travel to help them on their quest. Of course a contractual marriage of necessity isn't the best way to start a relationship, especially between two people who have vastly different cultures.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,323
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
    97
    Kudos:
    509
    Bookmarks:
    181
    Hits:
    13246
  8. Tags
    Summary

    The fellowship has set out on its noble quest to destroy the ring and put an end to the threat that is Sauron! Just set out really, barely left the gates of Imladris, but things are going smoothly enough so far. That is until the two most unlikely party crashers fall upon their little fellowship. Uncle Bilbo and the Legendary Thorin Oakenshield?! Frodo just wants to know what's going on but the two of them won't stop hollering at each other long enough for anyone to get a word in edgewise. Suddenly, their little group is joined by Frodo's two biggest heroes and he discovers there was a lot more to Uncle Bilbo's stories than he realized.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    58,100
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
    784
    Kudos:
    1491
    Bookmarks:
    440
    Hits:
    26610
  9. Tags
    Summary

    In the Shire there were two truths. The Tooks were odd and the Baggins were respectable. The Baggins family dealt in contracts and favours, and while the Shire knew that the Tooks were odd, it was the Baggins family that had other blood running through their veins.
    Bilbo Baggins did not go running out his door for want of an adventure, he went running out his door because of a terribly worded contract and a laughable quest that somehow held the spark of other.
    In this story, it is not the Tooks that held fae blood in their family tree, it is the Baggins, and theirs is so much closer to the surface.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    74,087
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    468
    Kudos:
    1982
    Bookmarks:
    856
    Hits:
    31859
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Bard has his interview with Bag End Bounties Inc. Bilbo tries to keep his cool and Tauriel mediates.

    Trigger Warning for Bilbo hinting/implying at being a bit biphobic.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,618
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    34
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Hi! I'm Sierra Parker, a typical albeit hilarious bean that ended up doing not such typical stuff.
    I'll be narrating my own story...welcome! Glad to have you along for the journey there and back again!
    Your opinions, comments, questions,and kudos mean a dragon sized amount. Hold onto your hats, this roller coaster has some crazy surprises along the way! [Seriously, it keeps me writing, so bring the love, humans!]
    Oh, if you have any problems, dial information, thank you for calling.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,788
    Chapters:
    25/70
    Comments:
    75
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    1032
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo Baggins, Hobbit and burglar extraordinaire has some very bad coping mechanisms.

    Or: Bilbo runs away from Erebor after the Battle Of Five Armies to avoid Thorin's possible rejection, only to get hunted down by a bunch of angry dwarves.

    (Please heed the tags!!!)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,831
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    34
    Kudos:
    252
    Bookmarks:
    44
    Hits:
    2146
  13. Tags
    Summary

    It's early in their journey and everyone's still getting used to the soft hobbit, but there's a reason that hobbits don't leave the Shire. Bilbo's got a secret that might get him killed. And this dwarf pack may be willing to do it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,655
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    84
    Kudos:
    422
    Bookmarks:
    89
    Hits:
    4449
  14. Tags
    Summary

    A few months have passed since the Battle of the Five Armies and Thorin has been working himself tirelessly to see Erebor rebuilt. Unfortunately, running himself into the ground causes an illness that 'caretaker' Bilbo won't let him ignore.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,349
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    92
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    723
  15. Tags
    Summary

    One would think with the communication device in everyone's hands, life would be easier. Words would be more easily said. But no. Nothing is ever simple.

    The one where Bilbo is a tired teaching fellow and a part-time worker in a bookshop, his best friend is his student Ori who is in love with Fili and a lot of them are friends with Bofur who joined college late. Thorin, Fili's Uncle, is a grump and (apparently) the only sane member in his family. Balin is done with this lot. Dis is having too much fun. Frerin is just at the right place at the right time (or maybe it's the wrong place at the wrong time- it depends on the perspective). Dwalin and Nori are fucking. Balin and Dori are too. FIli and Ori are pining over each other and making Bofur and Bilbo's life hell.

    Even with these communication devices in their hand, these people, in teh best way possible, are a clusterfuck.

    Modern AU, Texting AU

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,150
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    48
    Kudos:
    102
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1681
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo's hands gripped Thorin's wrists, the only thing stopping him from plummeting to the ground. He smiled softly. ~It's ok,~ Bilbo whispered.

    Thorin's eyes widened at the Khuzdul and Bilbo slipped from his grasp as in surprise Thorin's fists loosened.

    He fell from the gates, his body arching towards the stone as time seemed to slow. Several of the dwarrow cried out.

    With a sickening crunch Bilbo hit the stone, blood pooling from his head.

    It was if a bucket of water had been thrown over Thorin's head as with a snap the dragon sickness vanished. But it was too late.

    And then someone let out a snort of relief. And started laughing.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,994
    Chapters:
    20/?
    Comments:
    448
    Kudos:
    397
    Bookmarks:
    114
    Hits:
    10175
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Bluebell understands perfectly well that she and her brother are far too different. Where Bilbo enjoyed the comforts of home and complete lack of anything out of the ordinary, Bluebell craved the sightseeing of the world, to discover new places or visit grand ones already named. Bluebell, an immature and childish Hobbit, has been forced to remain under the care of her elder brother Bilbo, who swore to their parents she would never know harm or discomfort. That is, until a wizard wanders into Bag End in search of someone who sought out an adventure. | Thorin Oakenshield/Original Character|

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,488
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    19
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    391
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo Baggins was not your average hobbit. Of course, he had the wonderfully groomed and well-taken-care-of hairy feet like every other one of his race, yes, but he was not like other hobbits. He was cursed. Or, as the witch who gave him the enchantment put it, was “gifted”. She had given him the “gift” of obedience – whenever there was a direct command given to him, for example “cook a large meal” or “take a walk”, he could not disobey. Not without a lot of pain and eventual submission.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,460
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    91
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    1073
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo has no chill. Absolutely none. Neither does Ori.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    431
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    108
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    942
  20. Tags
    Summary

    In a Hole in the ground, there lived a Hobbit. But this is not your usual hobbit. No, she was a rather different sort, really, and all of the Shire knew it. She was a Bounder. Her name is Aconite Baggins.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,091
    Chapters:
    6/23
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    130
    Bookmarks:
    46
    Hits:
    2181

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