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  1. Tags
    Summary

    What would happen if you threw a level 20 Bard from D&D 3.5 into Thedas with the vague instruction to "help all these idiots be happy"? She's not a good person, but everyone in Thedas is very pretty and someone has to burn down all of Orlais and Tevinter, right? And then her Sorceror/Incantrix friend decides to come along to "help"?

    Updates weekly-ish

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    232,986
    Chapters:
    49/?
    Comments:
    100
    Kudos:
    136
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    5257
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Corrigan of Morningvale and Garravel the Silver Dragon seek the powerful artifact Mythrien’s Ring. But in the process, they are captured, escape, and find themselves embroiled in the politics of northern Elturgard and its neighbouring kingdom, the Free Forest. Can they protect their friends from the machinations of the supremacist Eldreth Veluuthra? Who is the mysterious Prince Aidan? And what would convince a free-spirited bard like Corrigan to return to captivity when she has finally gained her freedom?

    Updates every Tuesday and Friday.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    52,719
    Chapters:
    22/44
    Kudos:
    58
    Hits:
    95
  3. Tags
    Summary

    This was previously called "WHAT'S A LIFETIME WARRANTY?", but damn, it sounded too awkward.

    When I started Don't Go Shopping, I promised you it will end well. And… it did.

    I can't make the same promise now, though.

    This starts at the half of Chapter 43 in Don't Go Shopping, I will add the part of the chapter that still applies as part of the prequel chapter here, all in italics, so you know when the new stuff begins. It's the "what if Legolas wouldn't have wanted to stay home with Thranduil, after his disclosure."

    And, in short, is all about the dark side having cookies.

    Aaand I made a discord, if you want to shoot the breeze about the stories or whatever: https://discord.gg/ySHZTHw

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    106,229
    Chapters:
    38/?
    Comments:
    112
    Kudos:
    87
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    6008
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Thorin is pulled back from the brink of death by Gandalf's magic, using the arkenstone as a focal point, and Bilbo's love for Thorin as a beacon to keep the dwarf king from slipping away into death. Unfortunately, something goes wrong and when he wakes, Thorin can remember everything, except for one, dear friend.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,829
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    140
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    1749
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Josie, just a small town girl, living in a lonely world. She took the midnight forest going anywhere. LOL.
    She is held captive and terrorized in a secluded cabin by her evil, sadistic ex boyfriend Peter and comes to a breaking point of, it's do or die. Off she runs deep into the forest to escape his clutches, a decision that will change her life forever in a way she could have only dreamed of.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    405,462
    Chapters:
    88/?
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    2183
  6. Tags
    Summary

    In the year 1977, following a tragedy that upends his life, former emergency-room physician Thranduil Oropherion purchases a sprawling, centuries-old estate in northern New Hampshire, planning to ship his children off to boarding school and waste away without ever being seen again. His plans go awry immediately thanks to Bard Bowman, the caretaker of the estate, and as an unlikely friendship blooms between them, Thranduil finds himself slowly coming back to life.

    His house does the same.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    101,737
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    175
    Kudos:
    314
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    4691
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo Baggins is a gentle hobbit of good reputation. He is the proprietor of his family estate and has a comfortable fortune. He is also unmarried, at the age of 43, and the whole of the Shire is speculating that the vein of wildness that plagues his family line is hindering his chances. In fact, no one in the Shire can understand Bilbo’s refusal of so many proposals from very auspicious matches. But, when a mansion built on the far west side of the Shire is occupied for the summer by visiting royals, the Master of Bag-End might just find his perfect match. That is, if prides and prejudices can be put aside.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,440
    Chapters:
    3/21
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    37
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    388
  8. Tags
    Summary

    This is Eberron. It may be an Eberron you know, but it probably isn't. Watch how a bunch of low-to-average intelligence, mostly-high charismatic adventurers solve some mysteries or die trying. Hopefully they won't die, but no promises. The Master of Games is a devious one.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,255
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    45
  9. Tags
    Summary

    A Vietnamese girl finds herself unceremoniously dumped in Middle Earth years before the Council of Elrond. Not only does she have to argue with, sometimes, pigheaded elf-lords, her memories are patchy at most. On top of that, how do the Valar expect her to make any changes if she's gonna die before the events actually take place?

    Will span from the aftermath of the BOFA to the beginnings of the Fourth Age.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    61,770
    Chapters:
    19/?
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    290
    Kudos:
    930
    Bookmarks:
    199
    Hits:
    21738
  10. Tags
    Summary

    "Our life and death are one, we two.

    In dark, in flame, through war and strife, I save you as I save my life"

    Their souls are two parts of a whole. Their destiny is to keep the other alive, for one must live for the other to survive.

    Two people-one a selfish, spoilt commitment phobe, the other mistrusting, cold and anti social?
    Match made in heaven.

    Lots of action, emotion, fights, forced allies to bonds, angst.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,623
    Chapters:
    12/?
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    409
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Tired of your life in the Shire, you seize the chance to follow the strange company of dwarves that arrive upon your doorstep to Erebor. Adventure, love, and danger are all wrapped together in this strange tale that you must navigate and untangle on your own. Good luck...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    81,040
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    227
    Kudos:
    455
    Bookmarks:
    75
    Hits:
    10371
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Bard Bowman's not the type to give up on his dreams easily, but when DJ Smaug's dirty tricks leave his family band stranded in Denver with a forfeit fee the size of Mt. Everest crashing down on their heads, there's really nothing to do but drink about it. The last thing Bard expects is to meet a beautiful stranger in a similar predicament -- and the last thing either of them expects is a rescue.

    Luckily for them, Thorin Oakenshield's feeling heroic this evening.

    A companion to Show Me My Silver Lining, through Bard's eyes!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    184,784
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    164
    Kudos:
    186
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    4108
  13. Tags
    Summary

    "You need to know something," said Fili, taking her face in his hands. "You always have me. Even if the Valar take you away tomorrow, I will always be your brother. I want you. I'm going to fight Thorin for you, but even if I lose, you are always my sister. I would sooner stop being a dwarf than stop being your brother."

    Can exploring caves land you in a hobbit's pantry? It happened to Sara Miller. Taken from the 21st century, she must navigate through middle-earth to find a way back home. But to do so she will have to understand why the Valar have sent her in the first place, something even Gandalf does not know. All Sara wants to do is return home so she can resume the search for her family but now she is stuck going on this insane quest.

    Why are wizard's so capricious? Thorin has first hand experience with one, namely Gandalf. Thorin is determined to reclaim his home in Erebor for his people and was even prepared to accept a hobbit on the quest. But now Gandalf insists that if he wants his help he must allow a woman from another world into his company as well. But just because the wizard brings her along doesn't mean Thorin has to play nice. Who is this woman anyhow and why is Mahal's mark on her hand?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    449,026
    Chapters:
    64/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    497
    Kudos:
    616
    Bookmarks:
    158
    Hits:
    27370
  14. Tags
    Summary

    The Cult of the Dragon has come to Phlan, a lawless refuge on the Moonsea. Now, with no significant authority to stop the cult, other power groups in the Realms – the Harpers, Order of the Gauntlet, Lords' Alliance, and even the Zhentarim – must unite to stop the cult from fulfilling its dark purpose in the city. Join the fight by participating in any one of five different missions aimed at stopping the cult.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,039
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    18
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Following the Battle of the Five Armies, a grievously wounded Thorin is brought back to the kingdom of Erebor, which is still mostly in ruins. Although he’s survived the wounds he received at the end of Azog’s blade, his recovery is far from complete.

    When she's asked to help the dwarves tend to their wounded, medical student Jasna Stoneham reluctantly agrees. Not only is she only just barely a qualified to even set foot in the infirmary, but she stutters when she gets nervous and nervous does not even begin to describe how she's feeling. To make matters worse, no one thought to warn her that she would be caring for the king himself, Thorin Oakenshield.

    Unfortunately, the road to recovery isn’t necessarily a smooth one, but if there’s one thing Thorin will learn, it’s that what Jasna lacks in experience and training, she makes up for in stubbornness, giving him a run for his money. And for every backwards step he takes, she is there to push him three steps forward. And Jasna will soon find out that there is a gentle, softer side to the dwarf king, one that very few people have ever seen and one he fights to keep hidden from her as well. But like his recovery, that is also easier said than done.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    155,670
    Chapters:
    42/42
    Comments:
    429
    Kudos:
    256
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    7960
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Bilbo press-gangs Bard to write some poetry to woo Thranduil. Fortunately they have some help.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,912
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    83
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Bard knows he’s not quite human, nor that his children are. Accidents of the magical sort are too common in his household to be so. So, when their households mix, things are perfectly set for interesting times under the mountain.

    In between the merriment, however, a sinister shadow is preying upon them, biding its time to strike. And when it inevitably does, things will never be the same again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,867
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    44
    Kudos:
    147
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    3030
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Nori is having a fancy dress party in the pub for his 18th birthday; Bard really doesn't feel like joining in, but when Thranduil appears, he rather changes his mind.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,402
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    22
    Hits:
    60
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Thranduil's murderous ex-boyfriend is still on the loose, and although he's safely hidden inside Bard's house, there's not much for him to do but think things over. Out of all the things on his mind, there's only one he really wants to think about.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,365
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    32
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    103
  20. Tags
    Summary

    You are Bard's daughter and Bain's twin sister. When you first met the Prince of Mirkwood, Legolas Greenleaf, he was with his best friend Taruiel. They were chasing Orcs and the Dwarves, who had already left your home. You and Bain were trying desperately to protect your home and your sisters, Sigrid and Tilda, from the Orcs. You got badly injured. Are you going to be ok and let a certain Elf Prince help you? Or are you going to be stubborn like always and try to ignore your injury to go help stop the Orcs and save your hometown?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    599
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    26

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