1 - 20 of 518 Works in BAMF Jaskier | Dandelion

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    A collection of my Witcher "alternate universe" short stories--mostly, if not all for the geraskier ship--from my Twitter (@giddytf2). I'll update it whenever I complete a new twitfic there. ✍️

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,988
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    33
    Kudos:
    69
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    507
  2. Tags
    Summary

    A witcher, a Child Surprise, and two horses walked into Kaer Morhen. That was only the start of Geralt's troubles.

    In order to keep Ciri safe, Jaskier stepped on a path littered with spies breathing down his neck, witchers coming through his window, and a witch in his bed. At least Yennefer had enough self-restraint not to turn him into a frog.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    39,150
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    443
  3. Tags
    Summary

    “Because you don’t get to tell me you fucking love me and then go and sodding die on me, Geralt!” Jaskier shouted.

    Jaskier brings Geralt back from the dead after a hunt gone wrong. Because confessing your love to someone and then going and getting killed is just rude, frankly. Technically contains MCD, but it's extremely brief and doesn't stick.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,702
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    256
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    902
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Previously called: "Both Always Wanting" Set after ‘Rare as a Golden Dragon’ Geralt and Jaskier start traveling again and relearn each other, as well as learn themselves as they make their way to Ciri.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,819
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    137
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    2070
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Killing the drowner was ordinary. Going to the nearest town? Ordinary. Talking with the alderman? Ordinary.
    Not so ordinary was being paid in too few orens... and one heavily abused omega.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    97,310
    Chapters:
    58/?
    Comments:
    2410
    Kudos:
    2655
    Bookmarks:
    400
    Hits:
    83765
  6. Tags
    Summary

    After birthing himself from a fresh grave lifetime-decades ago, Jaskier has played the bard across the continent. He is content because he is who he chooses to be: safely forgettable; a weed who makes music.

    … Until the witcher, and the child surprise. Until the war. If he runs from his birthright, he risks the lives of everyone whom he ever held dear. If he embraces it – he loses them anyway.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,446
    Chapters:
    6/7
    Comments:
    112
    Kudos:
    418
    Bookmarks:
    141
    Hits:
    6651
  7. Tags
    Summary

    After a meeting with a duplicitous merchant, Geralt and Jaskier are on their way to Yennefer to inspect the weird mark left on the bard. On their trip, they came across a wanted poster for Jaskier, framing him for the murder of his own mother.

    The bard’s superpower was always his compassion and empathy but, during his vindictive and cold turn of nature, he realises humans are the real monster that are born out of malicious deeds done.

    Under the mercy of Master Mirror and unfinished business, Jaskier will stop at nothing to seek revenge. After all, he wasn’t careful what he wished for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,738
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    59
  8. Tags
    Summary

    “How do you think your strong will compares to a strong arm?”

    Jaskier closed his eyes and allowed himself a single, self-deprecating chuckle. “Rather badly it would seem.”

    Cahir huffed in response, releasing his hold and brushing a gentle hand down Jaskier’s hair. “You have other uses I suppose.”

    *******

    Follows on from ‘Rare Species’. Jaskier and Geralt have been separated for a year. During that time Jaskier’s acclaim has continued to flourish far and wide, until eventually he attracts the attention of an emperor.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,851
    Chapters:
    15/?
    Comments:
    178
    Kudos:
    724
    Bookmarks:
    131
    Hits:
    13897
  9. Tags
    Summary

    It was in the silence his ghosts were always their loudest, their most dangerous; in stillness their most unavoidable.

    So Jaskier the bard sang his songs and filled the spaces. He hummed shanties long into the night, his fingers chasing up and down the strings of his lute like he had once chased his brothers and sisters up and down the rigging of their ships.

    Now he'd finally found a mentor who could teach him the final lessons he needed to become a full Witcher. So what if he seems strangely overprotective? They are the last of their schools, and Geralt allows Jaskier to walk his Path alongside him. Wolf and Crane, alone together.

    Too bad Geralt didn't realize what this strange human-seeming bard was actually asking of him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    83,510
    Chapters:
    22/26
    Comments:
    604
    Kudos:
    1155
    Bookmarks:
    323
    Hits:
    20571
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Five times Jaskier's true nature slipped out unconsciously, and one time it was intentional.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,005
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    212
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    1389
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “Don’t threaten her.” It was a warning from the White Wolf himself. Jaskier would have listened mere seconds ago. He could still feel the anxiety rising inside him, but it wasn’t the only thing boiling inside him now.

    “Or what? You’ll kill me?” He scoffed. “Don’t make empty promises, sweetheart.”

    “You reek of fear and still dare to talk back?”

    “That’s onion.”

     

    Or the Soulmate au Enemies to Lover you didn't ask for but still got.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,255
    Chapters:
    7/14
    Comments:
    74
    Kudos:
    323
    Bookmarks:
    76
    Hits:
    6593
  12. Tags
    Summary

    It’s almost 2 months after the Mountain Incident and Jaskier is sitting at a tavern, drinking his sorrows away. About Geralt, his sorry state of being (no lute, low on coin, alone), fall of Cintra just 2 weeks ago, fate and everything else. He though he was going to stay by the witcher’s side forever, but life’s no fairy tale. So more ale for him.
    In the corner Nilfgaardian soldiers get ready to kidnap the bard and give him to their wicked sorceress leader to force information from him about the lost princess. She may torture and curse him to get what they need, but hey, what can you expect from Fringilla Vigo’s student?

    Geralt’s 100% done with destiny. He’s with Ciri and has to hide from Nilfgaard's forces. And he still has to find Yennefer and beg her to locate his bard, damn it! And he needs to apologise if he wants to get his “dear heart” back.

    Yennefer licks her wound hidden in Brudge and contemplates her life.
    Triss helps fellow mages in Vizima.

    Lambert and Eskel travel south in search of Geralt, because they got letters from his bard saying their brother will need help.
    Oh, and they don’t even know about half of the shitshow it’s about to become. Truly ballad worthy story.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    105,876
    Chapters:
    43/?
    Comments:
    180
    Kudos:
    379
    Bookmarks:
    69
    Hits:
    17060
  13. Tags
    Summary

    “He doesn’t have much time now,” the demon observed, “Even Witchers need oxygen. This is your only hope of saving him.”

    Jaskier’s face went firm and determined, turning back to the creature with no sign of his earlier hesitation.

    The demon looked amused. “Are you sure he’d worth giving up so much?”

    “All that and more,” Jaskier whispered.

    Then he stepped into the circle.
    —————————
    To save Geralt, Jaskier lets himself be possessed by the demon he was hunting. Will there be anything left of the bard for Geralt to save?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,780
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    154
    Kudos:
    704
    Bookmarks:
    89
    Hits:
    7165
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier has a power hungry captor who wants to use him and punishes Jask when he won't call him Master.

    or

    Jaskier sasses and angry fucks his captor so well get gets the chance to escape. Violently.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,756
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    22
    Hits:
    311
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Geralt has only ever talked about one nuisance bard, the one that wrote the fucking song that has people throwing coppers at him when he walks into bars. Jaskier something or other, who gives a shit, “Why the fuck is he here?”

    “To winter with me,” Geralt snaps, a warning in his tone Lambert readily ignores. “Problem?”

    “Yeah, the problem is the strange prostitute you brought to The Keep!!” Lambert exclaims, because he’d had a feeling Geralt was smitten, but apparently, he’s an idiot and doesn’t know a bad idea when he sees one if it smiles at him pretty enough.

    “Hey, I’m at least a strange courtesan!” the bard calls.

     

    (Lambert is extremely protective of the very little he has, including his brother. Jaskier is a threat to all of them, he doesn’t get why everyone doesn’t see that.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,583
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    66
    Kudos:
    812
    Bookmarks:
    171
    Hits:
    3276
  16. Tags
    Summary

    It's Jaskier's first winter at Kaer Morhen, and it definitely didn't get off to the best start, but he desperately wants to be welcomed at Kaer Morhen as Geralt's guest, or it's going to make for a terribly long winter. He's an assassin, sure, but not so much by choice these days now that the guild has burned him, so there must be more to life than that.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    67,530
    Chapters:
    25/?
    Comments:
    249
    Kudos:
    730
    Bookmarks:
    103
    Hits:
    16237
  17. Tags
    Summary

    The second installment of adventures with the feral Witcher and his danger magnet of a Bard.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,045
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    63
    Kudos:
    206
    Bookmarks:
    38
    Hits:
    3193
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Sorry about this, my brain has a mind of its own and now you all have to suffer with me while I fix it. Jaskier does not stay dead. Jaskier is reincarnated repeatedly as a wide variety of monsters. Witchers keep killing him again. Until they figure it all out. The ending will be happy.

    This is possibly going to be the only monsterfucker fic where nobody fucks monsters, but since I am in fact a disaster I cannot guarantee that will not change. I swore I wasn't going to publish this until the previous one was finished, and then I promised myself i wouldn't publish this until I had at least 10k words down but I have no self-control so here we are.

    Non-con: Jaskier keeps getting reincarnated as various monster-type creatures and does not always have control over what happens to his body or its reactions. More detailed warnings will be at the start of the relevant chapters. There's no other sentient being non-con.

    Dead dove do not eat: There are chapters from monster-Jaskier's point of view. Some are quite disturbing/explicit. The monsters aren't always canon-ish. Again, more detailed warnings will be at the start of the relevant chapters.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    40,880
    Chapters:
    33/?
    Comments:
    366
    Kudos:
    296
    Bookmarks:
    54
    Hits:
    7241
  19. Tags
    Summary

    The Witcher King of Kaedwen, Butcher of Blaviken and Warlord of the North, has taken eight Sacrifices from Redania. Eight noble children from the ages of fourteen to twenty have been thrown to the dark, bloody keep to a dark, bloody fate on the first of every year since the Warlord's Sacking of Cintra. Now, to save his sister, it's up to Julian Alfred Pankratz, bastard bardling and youngest son of the Count de Lettenhove, to make the trek and be sacrificed at the butcher's feet. There's only one problem.

    Nothing is as it seems when the wolves close in around him and reach out with hands instead of swords.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,871
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    589
    Bookmarks:
    170
    Hits:
    6476
  20. Tags
    Summary

    It is no secret to the men and women of the continent that Geralt of Rivia is one fine piece of ass.

    Most days Jaskier has to fight to keep from swooning at the very sight of his friend-- and he’s not alone in this predicament. He catches men and women in every town that they come across ogling Geralt in one way or another. Yes, Geralt’s attractiveness is blatantly, painfully, beautifully obvious to everyone with eyes.

    Everyone that is, but Geralt himself.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,508
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    167
    Kudos:
    709
    Bookmarks:
    121
    Hits:
    6442

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