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  1. Tags
    Summary

    You all had heard the tale. Of how Loki and Bartleby were hunted to be stopped from going back to Heaven. Yet what if there was more to their story?
    What if they were given a second chance by god but under a lower title?
    I am Metatron the voice of God. And I will be telling you this tale.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,629
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    65
  2. Tags
    Summary

    See, Randal liked to put thoughts in little boxes so they were tidy. He never opened the boxes, never looked inside. He'd let the thoughts rot if they could.

    Being gay was something he'd put in a box when he was pretty young. The idea of being in love with anyone was in a box. Being in love with Dante? Two boxes, at least. He never opened them, they never saw each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    953
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    7
    Hits:
    35
  3. Tags
    Summary

    randal takes a short break from being a sardonic slacker and happily does his friend a favor, not that dante'd remember much of it the next morning

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    483
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    43
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Despite everything that happened the night of Julie Dwyer's funeral, aka The Worst Day of Dante Hicks' Life, everything is still the same. Dante still finds himself miserable at the Quick Stop, dealing with Randal's 'philosophical' questions about porn and Star Wars, and "every backward ass fuck on the planet." The only thing making it worse is that he doesn't have Veronica's shoulder to cry on anymore. Though, will the new Canuck with a tendency to overshare (mostly about Jeff Goldblum) that moved in shake things up?

    No, not really. But, a new friend to distract him from the shittiness of his life is always appreciated.

    aka Clerk meets Clerk. Mundane shenanigans ensue.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,850
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    8
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Bob spends a day without Jay. He's happy when he sees him again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    895
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    32
  6. Tags
    Summary

    jay realizes he might be a little gay, and for silent bob at that.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    890
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    95
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Banky and Hooper live together a lot.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,663
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    67
  8. Tags
    Summary

    God convinces Metatron he needs a week off, no holy powers, no contact to Her, just mortality and time to breathe. But when he ends up back in New Jersey of all places, he starts to regret his decision, surrounded by stoners, annoying clerks, and the only human being that seems to get him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,287
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    56
  9. Tags
    Summary

    The Dale Stronghold is said to hold many secrets within its walls, that it is rumored to be a sanctuary of sorts for supernatural beings and creatures. Created out of the ashes of the fallen Hellmouth by a child of it. Alexander and his Other, wanted a home for themselves but it turned out to be so much more...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,230
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    208
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Jay loved going to the mall, for the food court and the comic book store, but most importantly, for the pet shop.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    797
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    9
    Hits:
    48
  11. Tags
    Language:
    中文
    Words:
    2,657
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    2
    Hits:
    71
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Despite his normal behavior, Randal Graves is supportive of Dante and his five-year-old daughter after Becky leaves them. But when the stress starts to pile up on Dante until he can't handle it anymore, Randal makes a move that changes how they both see each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,707
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    141
  13. Tags
    Summary

    There is no book titled "How to Raise Divine Offspring for Dummies". Rated T only for language - it is based on a Kevin Smith movie, after all - and a very mild T at that.

    (story is technically unfinished - there will be more, I promise! However, it was originally set up as a series of one shots, so even unfinished it hopefully doesn't leave you hanging at all)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    46,382
    Chapters:
    38/?
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    1073
  14. Tags
    Summary

    "'I love him', God whispers to his angel. 'I know', answers the angel, 'but I've loved him longer. I loved him first.'"

    Created to carry out God's anger for all eternity, Nathaniel can feel a little bit of himself slip away each time he calls down misery and death upon human kind. Brad is the only thing keeping him anchored.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,695
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    29
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    358
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Bartleby and Loki are celebrity wine-tasters.
    Loki has read too much French post-structuralism for anyone's well-being.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,482
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    39
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    244
  16. Tags
    Summary

    You think that Gravity Falls is the only place that's weird? Thanks to the Internet, Ford and Dipper realize it's just the tip of the iceberg....

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,319
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    465
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Рай - не Висконсин

    Language:
    Русский
    Words:
    846
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Kudos:
    12
    Hits:
    68
  18. Tags
    Summary

    He could feel a dull ache in the pit of his stomach. The absence of Her presence like going to bed without supper. There's always hunger.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,071
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    216
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Bethany wonders who gave her her little gift. Was it God? Really?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    424
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    164
  20. Tags
    Summary

    After the mess that was "Truth or Date", Gil was planning on sulking for a bit then heading back to New Brunswick. However, plans were changed when he was invited to hang out with a girl for the rest of the evening. Things escalate to say the least.

    REPOST.Originally posted in 2016. Original title was really long and I can't even remember the whole thing, whoops.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,286
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    154

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