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  1. Tags
    Summary

    David Rose stepped out of the rental car and pulled his suitcase from the trunk. He slipped the weekender bag over his shoulder and stared up at the house before him. It never stopped to amaze him that his parents had managed to build such a mammoth of a home in such a small town. Then again, avoiding a place for almost a decade would change anyone’s perspective.

    -----

    David returns home to Schitt's Creek after a ten year absence for his sister's wedding where he is forced to face not only the reasons he left in the first place, but the mistakes that he's made along the way.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,110
    Chapters:
    9/10
    Comments:
    182
    Kudos:
    187
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    3287
  2. Tags
    Summary

    It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a girl boss in possession of two hot girlfriends and notable skill at the sport of billiards, must be in want of men to hustle out of their money.

    Even better if the girl boss' two hot girlfriends are also pool sharks.

     

    AKA: Stevie, Alexis, and Twyla make a lot of money running a hustle out of the Wobbly Elm. Chapters will go up once a day, ending on January 28.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    950
    Chapters:
    1/3
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    3
    Hits:
    12
  3. Tags
    Summary

    “You picked a hell of a time to run away.”
     
    Patrick Brewer runs away from his old life and ends up at the Rosebud Motel the day a tragic event changes the world forever.

    A dystopian AU.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,846
    Chapters:
    31/?
    Comments:
    105
    Kudos:
    93
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    4638
  4. Tags
    Summary

    What if Moira was the one who took the pregnancy test (not Jocelyn)?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,953
    Chapters:
    77/?
    Comments:
    302
    Kudos:
    41
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    3693
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Twenty-two years into their marriage, David is diagnosed with early-onset dementia. He and Patrick attempt to navigate what that means for their lives.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,781
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    45
    Kudos:
    121
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    576
  6. Tags
    Summary

    David thinks Patrick Brewer, junior captain of the Schitt's Creek University baseball team, is cocky and obnoxious. Patrick thinks David Rose, son of the university's president, is stuck-up and aloof. But all of their friends can see they're in love with each other, and hatch a plot to make them fall for each other.

    First-year Alexis has her eye on senior baseball team captain Ted Mullins. But their budding romance is put into question when Ted thinks he sees Alexis kissing someone else. Chaos ensues.

    -----

    A retelling of Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,178
    Chapters:
    5/24
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    23
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    665
  7. Tags
    Summary

    When the Doctor asked him later, he couldn’t explain how it had happened exactly. One minute he’d been coming back down from the ridge where he’d proposed to David, having taken a moment to soak in the view from one of his most favourite places in the world, and the next he’d been lying in the middle of the trail consumed by pain.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,997
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    142
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    2721
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Twyla had never seen herself as someone who could catch the eye of someone like Mutt, let alone someone who would be interesting enough to watch on national television. But what was fate if not a series of lucky decisions and choices, aligning together to create something wonderful?
     
    -

    In truth, Alexis doesn’t know a ton about Mutt, aside from the fact that he’s hot - those abs - and that something about his reticence is charming. Her friend Jitney encouraged her to apply for the show, and fresh off her third break-up with Stavros, she figured, why not?

    -

    Twyla Sands and Alexis Rose meet on Mutt’s season of The Bachelor.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    62,300
    Chapters:
    4/10
    Comments:
    78
    Kudos:
    46
    Bookmarks:
    11
    Hits:
    765
  9. Tags
    Summary

    The prologue of the young lives of Johnny and Moira Rose, how they met, married, and grew the Rose family before landing themselves in Schitt's Creek. Let's take a deep dive into who these people are and how they developed into the wonderful characters we know and love.

    Eventually David and Alexis. Daily Updates!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,894
    Chapters:
    9/16
    Comments:
    67
    Kudos:
    20
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    423
  10. Tags
    Summary

    David’s first real memory of Patrick involved a scraped knee, a dandelion, and a sunny smile that, upon recounting the tale of how they met, left him blushing so hard Alexis had singsonged “David and Patrick sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” for a solid week.

    The story of Prince David and Bodyguard Patrick from the very beginning. Updates weekly because we are starting the New Year off right!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,076
    Chapters:
    4/6
    Comments:
    36
    Kudos:
    93
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1119
  11. Tags
    Summary

    David is the infamous son of Moira Rose, former TV star. He used to live for the spotlight, but these days he wished things were a bit quieter -- in fact, his job is banking on it. So when the paparazzi catch him in a not so respectable position outside of a gay club it blows up on the internet and in his face. His boss has one request: shape up and get important donors back or look for a new job.

    This is when David hatches a plan. What if he were to find a clean-cut, respectable boyfriend to take as his plus one to the benefit? His boss couldn't possibly fire him then. Enter, Patrick Brewer the criminal defense attorney who is also in need of a spruced-up social life -- but for different reasons.

    OR

    The Boyfriend Material AU that I was desperate to write. (Seriously if you haven't read this book you need to!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,416
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    33
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    431
  12. Tags
    Summary

    “So did you start wearing all black because you’re an international cat burglar or did you base your career choice on your wardrobe?”

    Or, David used to be a jewel thief. Allegedly. He doesn't do that anymore.

    Patrick works in insurance, and he has a few questions about those recent break-ins...

    An AU in which David leaves Schitt's Creek for good at the end of season one, and then his past starts to catch up to him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,039
    Chapters:
    2/10
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    38
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    326
  13. Tags
    Summary

    For all that the motel looks exactly the same as the last time Rachel was here, the energy that surrounds her feels wildly different. The nervous anticipation that had churned in her stomach last year is gone, replaced instead by peaceful contentment. Today, she’s just here to celebrate her friend’s birthday.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,353
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    49
    Kudos:
    130
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    710
  14. Tags
    Summary

    A non-chronological, random sampling of text messages from the third year after the finale.
    Sequel to This Will Be Our Year: An Epistolary Peek and This Will Be Our Year: A Second Epistolary Peek.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    0
    Chapters:
    10/13
    Comments:
    287
    Kudos:
    277
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    6678
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Rose Gold, the up-and-coming New York based PR firm run by brother-sister tag-team David and Alexis Rose, specializes in making over both individuals and organizations from the inside out. Still new to the game, their services haven’t exactly become as sought-after as they were hoping in the big city. Their saving grace – both personal and professional – comes from the last place David ever thought he would find himself again - and he doesn't just mean Canada.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,983
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    412
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Patrick smiles indulgently. “So you and Alexis didn’t pretend to be lawyers so you could finagle your way into a meeting with Wendy and the Australian Blouse Barn people?”

    “Um, technically, only Alexis pretended to be a lawyer. I just...didn't correct the Blouse Barn lady when she made the same assumption about me.”

    Patrick nods and his eyes are so fond. “Why didn’t you tell me?"

    David shrugs. “I told you Wendy gave me the money I used to start the store.”

    “Yeah,” Patrick agrees. “But you made it sound like it was some kind of severance package or something. You didn’t tell me that you got her the money, and then she passed a fair chunk of it over to you.”

     

    Or: Patrick learns how David really got the money and has feelings about it. Filth & Feelings and a gross misuse of office space ensue.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,981
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    266
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    1360
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Alexis and David have a conversation prior to the start of her and Twyla's wedding.

    Title from "Right Here, Right Now" apart of the High School Musical 3: Senior Year soundtrack

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    452
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    90
  18. Tags
    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    300
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    53
  19. Tags
    Summary

    While Alexis would like to spend her Friday night indulging in a Say Yes To the Dress marathon, Twyla has other ideas on how they could be using their time together.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    422
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    53
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Patrick is looking forward to starting Christmas this year. The store has been busy, and his parents are driving down to join he and David for a few days. David's family are also flying in to join in the festive celebrations. He's looking forward to cooking Christmas dinner with his husband, and starting new family traditions in their first year of marriage. The problem is, for Patrick, Christmas starts with a cough.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,514
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    41
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    363

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