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When you're gone

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What was happening? She didn’t know. The only thing she was conscious about was that he wasn’t there anymore. He had left everything behind. All the adventures, the friendship, the loyalty. He had left her. Just like that. She could hear his voice echoing inside her ears. The last words he had said before leaving were still fresh in her mind: ‘I get it. You choose him.’

            Nonetheless, there was a thought that wouldn’t leave her mind. If he had known who she would really want to be with, would he leave them anyway? She knew she might never have an answer to that, but she wished, deep inside her heart, that someday, they would find each other.

            Only Merlin knew how much she missed that silly red-headed boy. How she missed when he played with her hair while she cried upon his shoulder, or those jokes with no humor at all, his old clothes spread on the floor. She remembered the way she felt when he left. She counted the steps he had taken before that sad moment when he apparated away. Away from her.

            But it didn’t matter now. If only Harry and she had the guts to talk about it, she would be less revolted. But no. Since Ron’s leaving, they hadn’t said his name nor mentioned what had happened that night. She didn’t have any doubt Harry had heard her crying after that. She didn’t want her friend to worry about her, so she kept the tears until the boy would leave the tent to search for food or logs. Or when he went to sleep. Then she would go outside and cry her heart out, not even minding the cold.

            There were times she would catch herself thinking about him, if he was safe and what he was doing. She felt bad for not knowing if he was hungry or cold or had a descent shelter; it killed her inside, making her feel less than nothing for not being able to help her Ron.

            A loud noise made Hermione wake from her thoughts. Harry’s snorts were getting louder and louder, it seemed. Taking a sip of her tea, she noticed it was already freezing cold. How long have she stayed on the kitchen thing about Ron? A lot more than she should, that was for sure. But this time she spent by herself thinking about him made her feel certain about at least one thing. It didn’t matter what Ron had done and how he had hurt her. She would always love him.

            Always.