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Slayer Slain Slay

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Slayer Slain Slay


Sing to me, Watcher, of the women supernatural,
the line unending of those Chosen to Slay.
Many mouths of hell they’ve seen and learned their ways,
many pains they’ve suffered, driven time and again
by fate, fighting to save their lives and peoples.
Write their stories, Watcher, heir to duty,
start from where you will--



I’ve got shoes on the mind
as I stalk through gravesville
population undead’s going down

don’t tell Xander
but I’m thinking about
superheroes--superheroines? super women heroes?
and how they always
fight in heels

it’s totally not fair
they must have their heels glued to their feet
to pull it off
Giles insists I’ll break my neck
if I keep trying

Slaying: not for the weak of wardrobe
real clothes and monster goo non-mixy things
so I hide Giles-approved outfits deep in my closet
including sneakers
pathetic much?

Willow doesn’t get it
(style’s not her strong suit)
I feel good when I look good
(I’m not trying to impress the vamps)
anyway, sneakers make me look short

This just in
All Slay and no play makes Buffy sad
next thing you know I’ll be wearing tweed


The Master free!
so dead
he’ll kill everyone
so much for being the hero
here i am dying I dream her dying
strength drowning do you want to be strong?
No! yes
no Yes!
i can’t I can
this meant to be? meant to be
so pitiful a poor death
sorry, Giles I will do better
i screwed up I will go out fighting
Slayer slain Slaying many evil beings
don’t want my sisters will dream of me
please glory undying I will live, live, live
oh god forever and ever yes
too young the unbroken chain
not like this they will remember me
air honor me, I will inspire
no Mr. Zabuto sir
I have been Chosen!
(the Slayer is dead)
(long live the Slayer)


O monsters all run away
For she’s trained and out to kill
The Slayer’s gift is to Slay

Watch her work both night and day
‘Pointy’ is her stake and skill
O monsters all run away

Chosen she is here to stay
Her past sisters’ shoes to fill
The Slayer’s gift is to Slay

Duty has the final say
It she fearless will fulfill
O monsters all run away

Feelings lead one far astray
Such distractions do one ill
The Slayer’s gift is to Slay

Watcher tells her to obey
Calling’s honor demands will
O monsters all run away
The Slayer’s gift is to Slay.


look, Pink Ranger    
I’m the Slayer, you’re    
the spare    
we don’t need you here    
    Mr. Zabuto sent me here
    dere is a dark power risin’
    Buffy, dere’s no need for ya fear
    t’ough ya boyfriend be surprisin’
no friends? no family?    
Miss Perfect Slayer,    
I know you have emotions    
    emotion be weakness to Slay
    dere’s no room for fightin’ yaself
    when fightin’ monsters: make dem pay
    put all ya feelings on a shelf
anger does not    
to the Dark Side lead    
passion makes a better fighter    
    when dis is over
    will you show me how to use
    a crossbow?
hold the fort: I have    
to rescue Angel    
    ya are a fool
I have to--    



even de tought of
me sisters not break de spell
her eyes sing me




There was a poor girl from Boston
who became suddenly awesome
Kakistos then came
and much to her shame
she couldn’t make murder cost him.

There once was a Slayer named Faith
to Buffy she ran to be safe
once there, pretended
nothing upended
an act which they swallowed on faith.

There once was a truth five by five
that Faith feared she wouldn’t survive
but they didn’t see
she needed to be
accepted in order to thrive.

There was a Young Lady distressed
who by Wesley was not impressed
he was quite the fool
to stick by the rule
and soon was the one most distressed.



    Want, take, have
    that’s my motto
Uh, Faith, I think the nice vampire’s    
dead now, you can stop    
    come on, Buffy, loosen up a little
    aren’t you tired of being
    Miss Goodie Two Shoes all the time?
I’m not boring!    
I do exciting things    
like wear sneakers    
    Want, take, have
    say it, Buffy
    don’t we deserve it?
    they owe us
La la la    
I’m not listening    
    want, take, have
    live a little, princess
I’ve already died once    
    want, take, have
want, take, have   want, take, have
want that crossbow   want that crossbow
take that crossbow   take that crossbow
have that crossbow   have that crossbow
kick ass    
    five by five
    we’re superior
what am I doing?    
    doing what feels good
this doesn’t feel good    
this is bad    
bad Buffy bad    
    fuck rules
    fuck Watchers,
    fuck destiny
    girl deserves a break now and then
oh shit oh shit oh shit    
I can’t do this    
sorry, Faith, but    
what the hell do you think you’re doing?    
    want, take, have
    fuck you, golden girl
    I’m been a have-not
    and I’m not going back ever again


A Slayer’s duty
is to Slay; her Watcher she
must always obey

Wesley, you prick, you’ve driven
her away; the Watcher’s job--

A Watcher’s duty
is to direct; the Slayer
needs not be correct

Listen to me, you bastard
it’s all your fault she’s gone rogue

Sometimes a firm hand’s
necessary; a Watcher
must not love his charge

if you don’t love her, you have
failed in your most sacred charge

I don’t understand
the Council says quite clearly
to keep one’s distance

you know what? screw you, and
screw the Council; I’ve had it

But Giles, I need you!
I mean, I am a fully
capable Watcher--

Watcher’s duty is protect;
Slayer lives for more than Slay

Death her future and
her gift; strength a trap--
Watchers abuse it

Sing to me a better path
Sing her more than just a dream.


watercolor image of Buffy, Kendra, and Faith striking down at the same point with overlapping stakes

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