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Oh My God I Think I Like You

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Yuri’s chest slammed up against the glass and he could feel it shake beneath him as JJ pressed his slick fingers into him repeatedly, hard, curling up and slamming just into the spot that made Yuri’s eyes roll back in his head. JJ bent down to prop his head on Yuri’s shoulder, which he hated, so much bare skin on bare skin. He tried to shrug him off, but JJ just pressed in harder, licking the rivulets of sweat accumulating on Yuri’s neck and whispering into his ear with his hot, disgusting, fucking sexy breath. “You like that, don’t you, sweetheart?” he asked, sounding like a gross idiot. Yuri keened as he slammed in particularly hard, letting out a choked whine. “You getting nice and messy and loose for me? You ready for my big cock, babe? It’s been a while; your little hole might still be too tight for it.”

“If you don’t shut the fuck up, I’m leaving,” Yuri managed to get out, but then JJ withdrew his fingers and the sudden emptiness made him gasp out.

“I don’t think you want to go anywhere without getting some of my dick first, kitty cat,” JJ said, taking a nip at the skin behind Yuri’s ear. Yuri could hear the wet sounds of him slicking himself up, then the head of his cock was pressing against his hole and JJ was sliding into him all at once.

Fuck!” Yuri shouted out again, his head involuntarily jerking forward and hitting hard on the window. JJ had been prepping him thoroughly, but (and Yuri would never admit this out loud) he did have a massive cock and it was always a shock to Yuri’s body in that first initial push, no matter how many times he got fucked on it.

“Mmm, how does that feel? Too much for you?” JJ was raking his fingers through Yuri’s mussed hair, slowly easing his dick in and out of him.

“You wish,” Yuri said, trying to hold back the whimper when JJ gripped a handful of his hair and tugged back. “You have such a high opinion of your stupid cock; why don’t you try and fuck yourself?”

“My stupid cock, hmm?” JJ yanked back on his hair as he started to pound into Yuri mercilessly. “You want this stupid cock to make you come, don’t you, baby? You want to come all around it.” Yuri didn’t respond, instead biting down hard on his lip and letting his body smack against the glass as JJ fucked into him. He couldn’t say anything, because if he knew that if he opened his mouth all he would be able to say was how fucking good it felt, and JJ didn’t get that. Not from him.

JJ was hitting him hard now, almost right where he needed it, and then he reached his hand to wrap around Yuri’s cock. Yuri’s mouth flew open and he let out the most inelegant howl as JJ started jerking him off. He was going to come and come fast and JJ was going to be really nauseating because of it. Like he was the fucking King of Yuri’s Orgasms.

“Wait,” he panted out, and he batted JJ’s hand off of his cock. He shook his head, which was swimming. “Wait.”

JJ nuzzled down into his neck, kissed his hair. “Too much for you, baby?” he whispered into his ear. “Were you going to come for me already? Your whole body was shaking.” All of the sudden he pulled completely out, and it almost hurt, being filled and suddenly not. JJ grabbed a hold of Yuri’s shoulders and flipped him around, and they were face to face. “Don’t stop me from making you come, baby,” he drawled. “That’s the whole reason I’m here.” He skimmed his hands down Yuri’s back until they came to rest at the bottom of it. “Up.”

Yuri had the natural urge to be obstinate, but then JJ slapped his ass and he found himself jumping up into his arms and wrapping his legs tight around his waist without even fully registering that he was doing it.

“That’s a good boy,” JJ said, and he pushed back into Yuri. Fuck, he was so strong, able to hold him up like this and still fuck him so hard. Yuri’s head dropped down onto JJ’s shoulder, where he buried himself, allowed himself to cry out, bite down hard on his skin when it got to almost be too much. JJ’s fingers gripped hard into his skin and his lips just brushed at his ear. “It’s okay, let it out, sweetie,” he murmured. “Don’t deny yourself. Be as loud as you need. I know you can come just like this. You have before. The sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“I really hate you,” Yuri said, between choked out cries, and then he came. Yuri could feel tears in his eyes as he ejaculated hot and sticky between their two bodies. He sobbed, completely slumping into JJ, who stopped fucking him for a moment so that he could transfer them both to the bed. As he walked them over, JJ tipped up Yuri’s chin so that he could kiss him on the mouth. Yuri sobbed again into the sloppy kiss, but he accepted it, pressing harder against it, mouth open and wanting.

“There you go,” JJ said, laying him out gently on the sheets. He stood at the edge of the bed, and began to fuck an oversensitive Yuri again slowly. Yuri’s back arched up off of the bed and he balled up the sheets in his hands. It felt like too much so soon after orgasm, so much. JJ placed a hand on Yuri’s stomach, rubbing his thumb in circles where come lay cooling on his belly. “I wish I could come inside of you,” JJ said. “Like, really come in you, so you feel me fully, so I’d still be leaking out of you when you try to sneak out in the middle of the night.”

“Like I’d ever let you fuck me raw,” Yuri said, voice hoarse, but he watched with wide eyes as JJ brought the thumb up to his mouth and popped it in. He sucked on his fucking thumb, hard, until he slid it out clean, his hips began to stutter and he squeezed his eyes shut in pleasure as he came with one rough, final thrust. When he finally opened his eyes, he stared down at Yuri, actually winked, then darted out his tongue to lick at some come that had been dragged across his bottom lip.

“Oh no, Leroy,” Yuri said, already pushing back and pushing off. “You do not get to act like that when you are still fucking inside of me.” He backed up on his elbows, falling down against the pillows as JJ pulled off the condom and threw it in the wastebasket. JJ had this ridiculous habit of striding around completely naked after sex. He would never just lay down- he’d poke around in drawers, read pamphlets for local attractions left on the dresser. Yuri didn’t know how he managed it, actually. JJ would come and then instantly snap out of it, casual and normal while Yuri could only lie boneless and completely exhausted on the mattress.

Yuri pulled the sheet up, covering for modesty reasons, as JJ picked up a menu standing next to the TV.

“Are you hungry?” JJ asked. “We could order some room service.”

“I’m leaving as soon as I can stand,” Yuri said, rolling over onto his stomach and mumbling into the soft pillow. He tilted his head a little so one eye could peek out. JJ was standing with his back and bare ass to him as he hummed to himself, fidgeting up and down on the balls of his feet as he read down the menu. It was a nice view, at least. Yuri rolled completely to his side. His stomach felt a little knotted and weird and he didn’t want to lie on it. He probably should eat something. “Fine, get me whatever kind of flatbread pizza they have on there. And a milkshake. Strawberry. Since it’s going on your room bill and not mine.”

“Anything you want,” JJ said. He used the room phone to call down the order, then collapsed on the bed. “Scoot over.” He bumped Yuri’s thigh with his hip to make him move, then snuck one arm around his waist.

“Hey,” Yuri protested.

Heeeey,” JJ mimicked back, nuzzling his nose into Yuri’s loose blonde hair. It caused something thick and heavy to drop down Yuri’s chest, and he pushed back on JJ, but he didn’t push hard.

They ate in bed, watching reruns of Criminal Minds until it got too gross and Yuri made him change it. JJ then turned it to an old movie and turned off the captions, instead choosing to creatively translate the French for Yuri, a low whisper at the shell of his ear.

“I do not think that is what she is saying,” Yuri said, stifling his laugh into the milkshake straw. “I don’t even think they did that in black and white movie times.”

“People have been doing it pretty much forever, Yuri,” JJ said, dipping his head down to take a sip of Yuri’s milkshake. He swallowed and smacked his lips, and Yuri glared at him. “Don’t you know anything about the ancient Greeks? Or do you think that I was just that innovative?”

“I can’t believe you just took a drink of my shake,” Yuri said. “You had your mouth on my-”

“And then you shoved your tongue in my mouth after I did that, so I think you’re fine.”

JJ fell asleep with his plate of half-eaten food balanced on his chest. Yuri sighed when he saw him, collected all the the dishes and put them on the bathroom counter. Flipping on the light, he inspected himself in the mirror. Deep, purpled finger bruises spread out just above his hipbones. He lightly pressed his pinky into one and winced. Yeah, those would be there a while. At least they were in a place no one could see them. The last time they had met up like this, JJ had stupidly left one just under his collarbone and Mila had seen it- given him shit about it for weeks, trying to figure out who it was. Yuri would never admit to anything. As far as he was concerned, outside of this room, this was not happening.

He washed his face and brushed his teeth- there was a disposable toothbrush still wrapped in plastic sitting beside the sink, so he took it. After cleaning up, he ventured back into the room to look for his clothes so he could dress and head back to his own junior suite. He spotted his shirt crumpled up in the corner, but when he picked it up he noticed it was ripped down the sleeve. “Motherfucker…” he mumbled, looking over to where JJ was snoring into the pillow. He had known that he was rough, but somehow Yuri hadn’t even noticed that.

Looking around, Yuri saw one of JJ’s t-shirts lying over the back of a chair. It was plain and dark blue, and when he slipped it on, he noticed how big it was on him. He was almost the same height as JJ, but the other man was so much broader than Yuri’s still-slender body.

“Mmm, you look good in that.” The voice came from the bed unexpectedly, low and full of sleep. Yuri turned towards it. He could see JJ’s eyes slightly open in the dark.

“You ripped my shirt, asshole,” he said, though perhaps with not enough venom in his voice. “I was just getting ready to go.”

“Come here.”

There was a sliver of light coming in from the bathroom. It fell on JJ’s bare chest where the covers were down, showing off the dark hair there. Yuri intimately knew the feeling of it pressed against his back, but he didn’t know if he had ever actually ran his hands through it. It was different than his own- his chest still had a small growth of hair, almost totally lacking in color. Yuri found himself standing beside the bed, arms crossed, pale, skinny legs sticking out from underneath the shirt that JJ was now fingering the hem of between his thumb and index finger.

“Wearing my clothes, princess?” He let go of the material and let his palm slide down to the skin beneath. He gave a little pinch to Yuri’s inner thigh, and Yuri felt his knees buckle a bit beneath him. He was kneeling on the side of the bed, looking down at JJ.

“I’m going,” Yuri said.

JJ pouted, putting on his most pleading eyes that would most definitely not work on Yuri. “Wilt thou leave me so unsatisfied?”

“I think you were pretty satisfied,” Yuri scoffed, but the the harshness to his voice rounded out before he even finished the sentence, because JJ’s fingers were wrapping around his wrist, softly stroking the inside with his thumb. It sent a jolt of something unfamiliar through Yuri, something that forced a tightening up his chest that he couldn’t breathe out. JJ’s natural brashness was softened out in the dark, and he tugged a little bit on Yuri’s arm, trying to pull him down. Yuri’s legs stayed steady, locked into position.

“Sleep with me,” JJ said.

Somehow, he ended up being pulled into strong arms, and pressed against a warm chest. Yuri froze, but then he found his body beginning to melt unwillingly. He was tired, and JJ was warm, and he kept running his fingers through Yuri’s hair in a way that sent tingles up the back of his neck. Part of his mind wanted to fight against it, but the other just wanted to melt into it. JJ shifted, so that Yuri’s face fell into the crook of his neck. It was...comfortable. Nice. JJ smelled good, and Yuri breathed his scent in for a moment before he even realized what he was doing.

He breathed out. JJ shifted in bed, pulling Yuri in closer in an almost spoon. It felt fucking good, and then JJ pressed a kiss to the back of his neck and Yuri almost whimpered.

Oh, fuck. Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

“Yuri, aren’t you still in France? What time is it there?”

“It’s almost five,” Yuri whispered hoarsely. He was crouched down in the bathtub, curtain pulled closed, holding his phone close to his face. Otabek was staring at him curiously through the screen, gym bag on his shoulder, obviously on his way out for the day. Yuri peeked out towards the bathroom door, making sure it was still closed, then tried to lower his voice even more. “It’s an emergency, Beka.”

Otabek’s brows immediately furrowed, and he put his bag down on the floor. “Yura, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“I’m...I don’t know?” He pressed one hand over his eyes roughly, then ran it back through his messy hair. “Something happened, and I have literally no explanation for it.”

“I’ll try to help you, if you want to talk about it.”

Thank god for Beka, really. Yuri already felt a little better seeing his best friend’s face on the screen, worried and ready to help solve his problems. Maybe Otabek could help talk him down from whatever the fuck this was. No one did common sense like Beka.

“So,” Yuri said, letting that sit for a moment so that his words would have maximum impact. “I spent last night with JJ.”

Otabek stared at him blankly. “Yuri, I have known you were sleeping with JJ. You told me a long time ago.”

No,” Yuri said. “I did not just have sex with JJ. I- I slept slept with him. As in, after we were done having sex, I didn’t leave. I woke up this morning and his arms were all around me and- what the fuck, Otabek?”

Otabek raised an eyebrow. “I guess that is different,” he said, voice calm but with just a hint of curiosity. “So do you…like him?”

“Fuck no!” Yuri said, almost a little too loudly. He paused a moment to listen for any movement in the next room, worried he might have woken JJ, but that Canadian slept like a log. Yuri sighed, and turned back to his phone. “I mean, I don’t know? Maybe? Ugh, I can’t believe I am even contemplating this.”

Otabek frowned, obviously a little concerned for his friend’s conflicting emotions. “And you thought to call me about this? As much as I would love to offer you advice, you know this is...not really my area. I’d be more lost than you.”

“But you know everything Beka,” Yuri whined, leaning his back against hard porcelain. “My older, wiser, more experienced friend.”

“Not in this area,” Beka laughed, a sound small and rare. “Maybe you’re just avoiding asking someone close to you that you know would be able to offer more experienced advice? Maybe two someones?”

It wasn’t like Yuri didn’t know to whom Otabek was referring. Honestly, he had thought about it himself, but the thought of admitting this to anyone besides his best friend made him feel like curling up and dying.

“I won’t tell Viktor,” Yuri said. “Absolutely not.”

“I was thinking Katsuki would be the better choice,” Otabek said. “If you have a chance to talk with him alone?”

Yuri let his head hit the tiled wall and he closed his eyes. This evening he would be boarding an airplane with his coaches, and Viktor tended to fall asleep immediately when up in the air. He would have plenty of time to discuss this with Yuuri- if he could get the words out.

True to form, Viktor was out before the drink cart made its way down the aisle. The armrest was lifted between his seat and the little girl’s next to him, and his daughter was practically dozing on top of him. Even though they didn’t share any blood, Viktor and Emi were turning out to be disturbingly similar in some ways.

Yuri had kept his earbuds in the majority of the time he had been in the presence of the Katsuki-Nikiforovs. He just didn’t feel like talking. He was thinking. A million thoughts rattling around in his mind, the majority of them involving JJ’s sleeping face in the morning light as Yuri had stared at him from the bathroom doorway. The stupid asshole didn’t even have the consideration to look obnoxious in his sleep. He looked almost sweet (he was sweet anyway, a thought Yuri fought himself on) and really peaceful and handsome and Yuri had slammed the door on the way out, almost certainly waking him out of his slumber.

He only removed them from his ears when flight attendant came by and asked what he wanted to drink. He got an Orangina, resisting the urge to request something stronger. She put a little napkin under Yuuri’s soda, and he thanked her before she pushed farther down the aisle. He was taking a sip when Yuri gave a small cough to get his attention.

“Katsudon. Can I-” He paused, watching Yuuri turn to face him and give a small smile. “Can I talk to you about something?”

“Of course, Yurio,” Yuuri said. He set down his drink and folded his hands in his lap. “I thought maybe something was on your mind. If it is about your free skate-

"It's not about skating." Yuri fixed his sights on Yuuri’s face, his shoulders straight back and face stone. “None of this gets back to Viktor, alright? I’m asking you while he is sleeping for a reason. I know you guys probably tell each other everything, cuddled up in your little love nest, but-”

Yuuri laughed. He rolled his eyes and held up his hands. “Yurio, relax. I can keep a secret. What is it?”

“So.” He doesn’t know the exact way to start off. This thing with had been going on for around two and a half years, off and on. They’d fuck when they were in the same city, but nothing really more than that. It had just been sex. And besides Otabek, absolutely no one had known. Yuri had made sure of that. He wasn’t sloppy. Maybe Mila had guessed he had hooked up with an unidentified someone at some point, but that was about it. And he knew that there was practically no way that Yuuri had any idea of this. It would probably come as a huge shock. Yuri had to be gentle with how he delivered the news.

“So I’ve been fucking JJ.”

If Yuri was honest with himself, the one thing he had always regretted about having to keep everything secret was not getting to see the reactions of everyone when they found out, and Yuuri did not disappoint.

He almost doubled-over on a cough, then stared back up at Yuri with widened brown eyes. “You have what? Since when?”

“A couple of years?” Yuri said, trying to keep his voice calm. Relaxed. Like a guy who really was just fucking around, and didn’t have this crippling sensation in his chest like everything he knew was being flipped inside out. “It was- it has been- just sex. Not a big deal. I know I never liked the guy, but he’s good- you know!” Yuri felt himself getting a bit red in the cheeks, despite wanting to stay cool.

“Okay,” Yuuri said, obviously processing this information. “And you needed to ask something about this?”

It was easier with Otabek. Otabek knew the questions to ask to draw information out of Yuri, the things he didn’t want to say. Yuuri, on the other hand, just sat there expectantly, waiting for Yuri to open up to him like that was something he easily did.

“You can tell me,” Yuuri said softly. “I’m not going to judge you.”

“Why wouldn’t I care about you judging me?” Yuri snapped. Okay, dial it back. “...sorry. I just mean, I’m the one who has a problem with this. I don’t want this. It’s just lately, this past time when- I have been having weird feelings, Katsudon. Feelings. About him. Not all negative.” And Yuri just knew that he was red, now. He couldn’t hold his stare anymore, and his eyes fell down to the little plastic cup he was holding with both hands. “What do I do?”

“He’s not a bad person,” Yuuri said.

“I know that. An obnoxious douchebag isn’t the same thing as being a bad person.” Yuri really wished he had that drink now. He was talking to Katsuki Yuuri, one half of the most embarrassing, disgusting, lovey-dovey couplings in the world and Yuri was still having a difficult time admitting that he might have slight feelings for someone. For this someone, at least.

“Do you think he- feels the same way?”

“I don’t even know what way I feel, so how the hell should I know if it is the same? We don’t really talk much or anything outside of when we’re in the same city, so it’s just a hookup.” JJ always wanted him to stay, though. JJ had been the one to bring him back into bed the night before, JJ always kissed first, JJ was the one who called him all of those stupid fucking pet names that he hated. Yuri had consistently been the one to push him back.

However, JJ hadn’t ever really tried to get in touch with him outside of their hookups. It wasn’t as if he didn’t have the means to contact him. Yuri was sure they had both been on the same wavelength about the status of their not-relationship.

Until now. Maybe.

Damn it. Yuri really did hate this.

“There’s no use talking about this if you’re not going to be honest with me, or with yourself.” Yuuri dug his fingers into the small, shiny bag on his tray and pulled out the last pretzel. “Take some time. Talk to him. Figure out what he means to you. I know opening up doesn’t come easy to you, Yuri, but it will be worth it. There is no better feeling than connecting like that with someone. It’s like-” He started to get that sappy look on his face, and Yuri did not really feel like a speech about true love and soulmates and how he and Victor completed each other.

“I should have known you would give me some follow your heart bullshit,” Yuri muttered.

“Exactly,” Yuuri said. “You knew what I’d say. If it wasn’t really what you wanted to hear, would you have even asked?”

Yuri opened his mouth to respond, but before he could say anything, there was a noise on the other side of him, followed by a drawn out, high-pitched yawn.

“Toosan,” a little, sleep-slurred voice said. “Toosan, need to go.”

Emi was looking up blearily from where she had been asleep on her Papa’s shoulder. Viktor was still sound asleep, but Emi was staring up at Yuri and Yuuri with half open eyes and pouty lips.

Yuuri looked down at his tray table, which was littered with some papers and his iPad and a cup of Sprite and the salt and crumb remains of his pretzels. “Okay, Emichan, just let me-”

Yuri stood up. “I’ll take her. It’s easier for me to get up.” He stepped over a snoring Viktor then reached down to unbuckle Emi from her seat. She gave him a sleepy little grin and stuck her arms up. She was so warm in his arms as she wrapped herself around him, and heavier than he remembered. It had been a while since she had let him pick her up- she was asserting her independence, her fathers said- but right now she was just exhausted enough to allow him to carry her down the aisle to the cramped little bathroom.

He pulled down her leggings and lifted her to sit on the toilet. She was babbling about something as she sat there, but tended to just switch between Russian and Japanese, and Yuri’s Japanese was not good enough to follow a tired three year-old. He was content to just stand there, messing with the paper towel holder while he waited to hear pee.

This was what Yuuri and Viktor did constantly, Yuri thought. Every day. Yuri loved the hell out of Emi; he had fallen in love the day Yuuri and Viktor brought her home, but the idea of having to take care of her all the time seemed exhausting.

What was it like, to love someone so much that you wanted to raise a whole other life with them?

At twenty-two, Yuri had never been in love. He had had crushes- on Mila, on Yuuri, on Otabek. He knew that what he felt now wasn’t love, but it felt like more than those crushes. Maybe because he was actually physically involved with JJ? His mind still kept going back to the way he felt pressed up against JJ as they fell asleep. It had made him feel- well, kind of sick, actually- but it had almost just surrounded him in a warmth that he couldn’t help but want to stay cocooned in. Like stepping into a hot bath.

I need to shut up my stupid head before I start sounding like Lovesick and Piggy out there.

It was early morning when they finally landed. Yuuri had left the window up, Yuri could see the sun just starting to peek out in an array of oranges and pinks. They weren’t letting anyone off the plane yet, so Yuri looked down at his phone and switched it out of airplane mode. He first checked the temperature outside- cold as shit, no shocker there. He then switched over to Instagram, scrolling through without really giving anyone’s posts any mind. Well, he did stop for a second to like a picture of Chris’s cat, but that was to go without saying.

His finger stopped scrolling when he landed across a post from the account he wouldn’t admit he was looking for. It’s just a picture. A boring picture, really, a view of Paris that he knew was from the window of JJ’s room. (He had been intimately familiar with that window, after all.) It was what was written below that had Yuri staring at the screen.


À la prochaine, Paris! Next up- Rostelecom. #kingmidas #nothingbutgoldbaby #jjstyle #torussiawithlove #andibetterseeyoutheretoo