Work Text:
"If you weren't mean to him, he'd stop running off to stay with Poland."
Estonia looked at Latvia in astonishment. "What? I'm not mean to him."
"You're always on your computer! You never talk to him when he comes round!" Latvia flicked a finger at the screen in annoyance. "Who cares about your blog anyway?"
"My computer industry has made me wealthy," Estonia sniffed. "Maybe you should learn programming. Or are you still trying to get Russia to buy you?"
"That's not fair," Latvia muttered, going scarlet. "I was feeling very low and wracked with adolescent self-doubt."
"And what's the explanation for asking Sweden to invade?"
"I just want someone to take an interest in me!" Latvia said. "Anyway, he was very nice, and sent me a care package of crispbread and jam. Stop trying to change the subject – you're mean to Lithuania and I'm his favourite brother and I've always been his favourite brother for years and years and years and years and - "
"For someone who's almost a thousand years old you whinge like a baby," Estonia said. "Grow up."
"Well maybe if someone would put some money into my damn economy –"
"Don't swear, Latvia."
Latvia stormed out, yelling something about how Estonia wasn't his father. Estonia took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, thinking uncharitable thoughts about how nice it would be to be an only child. Then he got on Skype and tried to pass the buck.
"Hey, Lithuania," he said cheerfully, "Are you in the mood for visitors?"
"Sure," Lithuania said. "The house is looking a lot better these days, you could tell me what you think." He dropped his voice. "Though Poland helped out with the redecoration of the bathroom and kitchen, so you've got to be prepared for quite a lot of pink. And the most godawful sparkly toilet-paper holder. And it's not pink, but the wallpaper in the spare room is sort of, er, striking. I don't know where he finds these things, but every time I turn round there's something else I have to pretend doesn't make me want to claw my eyes out."
"Yeah?" Estonia said, checking his stocks. Not bad. "He's not trying to polonize you again, is he?"
"That'd at least be understandable. This is just - I swear to God, Eesti, I'm running out of ways to stop myself from dashing out of my own house, screaming in horror. I mean his house isn't this sparkly."
"Ah-ha," Estonia said. "See? You're thinking of Poland's house as a place of restrained good taste –"
" – let's not exaggerate."
" – and probably as somewhere nicer than your own. He's stealth-polonizing you." He laughed at the annoyed noise at the other end of the connection. Lithuania was very easy to wind up on certain topics. "Anyway, he means well, I'm sure. But how about some company to remind you of your roots? As long as you don't think that means I want to move back in as your vassal."
Lithuania laughed, as if he would never have thought such a thing. "Any time. When are you free?"
"I'm sort of busy right now but Latvia was saying –" Estonia's voice ran down as, through the window, he saw Latvia shoving a small, hastily made raft into the sea. He waded out after it, carrying a sack held out of the water, and clambered on. "Latvia was saying –" Estonia repeated. "Um." Latvia lay down, awkwardly shook the sack over himself, showering himself with flowers, and crossed his arms over his chest, obviously aiming to tragically and florally drift off to an unknown fate. "Just a second." Estonia opened the window. "Latvia! Stop that at once! Latviaaaaaa!"
Latvia flipped him off and resumed his tragic position.
"Did you have to scream in my ear?" Lithuania grumbled. "What's he doing now?"
"I can't even begin to explain. Latviaaaaaaa! Oh, er, sorry, Leedu. Listen, let me ring you back on my mobile phone and I'll put you on to him and for God's sake, tell him you want to see him and he's your favourite brother, all right?"
"You're willing to incur international call charges? Must be serious."
"Yeah, yeah," Estonia muttered, ripping off the headphones and jumping out the window. "Miserly Eesti, very funny. Whose is the best economy, huh?" He speed dialled Lithuania as he ran into the sea and grabbed the raft just as the current seized it. "It's for you," he said curtly, holding the phone out.
"Hello?" Latvia said, still lying on the raft. He absently arranged the flowers in a more aesthetically pleasing and poignant way. "Hi, Lietuva! Well, I don't know, my diary's kind of full right now. But I could come visit as a favour. If you needed me. OK, let me check with my secretary –" He covered the phone and smiled beatifically at Estonia. "He says he loves me best. So there."
Estonia managed to keep quiet, though he found he had many opinions he wanted to share with the world right then, on the topics of absent older brothers and all-too-present younger brothers and precisely how much he wasn't enjoying standing up to his waist in the Baltic sea while said brothers had a nice little chat on the phone, but all he said, after counting to ten in as many languages as he knew was, "Oh. I guess you were right."
Latvia sat up, spilling flowers into the icy grey water. "Told you. Oh, look at the time. I can't sit around playing at sailing with you all day, Eesti, pull me in to the shore, would you?"
"Of course," Estonia said grimly and got them both back to dry land.
"You don't mind if I use your bathroom first, do you?" Latvia said as they both squelched their way back to Estonia's house, shivering in the chilly air. "I'm expected in Vilnius by teatime." He skipped on ahead, obviously aiming at getting to the bathroom first no matter what Estonia thought.
"Be my guest," Estonia called after him, happy in the knowledge that soon Latvia would be Lithuania's guest, and he could get back to the serious business of running his economy and complaining about his family on Livejournal.
* * * * * * * * * *
Notes, historical and Hetalia:
In the strip The Three Close Baltic Nations, Estonia and Latvia vie in telling Lithuania how much they like him, and are miffed when he goes off to see Poland. Estonia also cares quite a lot about his blog. In 2008, Latvia had other things on his mind, like suggesting Roman Abramovich buy the country (plenty of room to dock his yacht!), or asking Sweden to invade. "Leedu" is Estonian for "Lithuania", "Lietuva" is Lithuanian for "Lithuania", "Eesti" is Estonian for "Estonia".