Your name is TEREZI PYROPE. Though you aren't actually one of the central characters in this story, your role in it is still important. Like for starters, the fact is that you happen to be the author's patron troll.
Though you have lost the use of your eyes in a FLARPing incident, you have learned to compensate by making use of your nose and tongue. Right now, you hear the familiar ding of the computer signaling that someone is sending you a message on Trollian. You make your way to your computer to see who it is and what is their business.
Once you are seated, you take a good whiff of your screen. This is a new smell. A medley of mixed berries blended so perfectly, sweet and tangy, with just a little bit of a bite. It's a wildberry punch color. You don't remember anyone with that text, and by extension, blood color. It isn't candy red, but it is quite intoxicating and is making your mouth water. You cover the screen with your tongue for a closer examination.
Then it occurs to you just who it is that owns this flavorful text.
caligurasAquarium [CA] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC]
Oh Gog, anyone but him.
CA: so hey ter i wwas just thinkin since vvri blocked me and all could you tell her something
CA: i mean i really want to say somethin to her maybe evven get back together
You don't know him much, nor have you talked much with him, but you know one thing; Vriska Serket got so fed up with him that she blocked him. The HUGE BITCH blocked this guy. You are dreading the inevitable hassle of responding to his post. But still, that's some tasty text. Maybe you can get him to linger in the chat for a while, just to get a good fix of that yummy violet text.
This should be fun.
But before we get into that, we'll start from the beginning; how 'wildberry punch violet text guy' ended up trolling you in the first place.
==>Be the other guy, moments ago.
Your name is ERIDAN AMPORA.
Your thinkpan comes in two settings: sleep and melodrama. You have a massive GENOCIDE COMPLEX, have emotionally taxed your moirail to the point where she is seriously considering breaking it off with you (though you don't know this), and you are a HUGE DICK.
Or you're just misunderstood. Actually, you're a bit of both. Indeed, the very premise of this story revolves around your need of a moirail who can both tolerate you and (hopefully) make you something of a better person. Whoops, did I just spoil that?
Today you think you'll try to get back together with your ex-rival, just for old times' sake. Maybe you'll start up a conversation and soon you two will be trying to one-up each other to see who can be the most over-the-top and melodramatic. Who knows, she might even want to FLARP with you, just like old times.
Truth be told, quadrants aren't all you ever think about - there is also science, magic (which isn't real), genocide, how much your life sucks, how your palecrush Feferi makes you smile and what a cool person you think she is, and you know, keeping her lusus placated with the feeding schedule so she doesn't wipe out all land-dwellers with the Vast Glub. Oddly, this contradicts your perchant for wiping out land-dwellers. You are however, very paranoid that if you don't get your buckets filled by the time the imperial drone comes with the filial pails, you'll be killed on site. Just like that other seadweller you got to see it happen to so many sweeps ago...
It doesn't help that everyone kind of thinks you're a tool. It's kind of off-putting and you've really got to stop doing it.
But in any case, you want to talk things out with Feferi, but she's off somewhere. Again. She's been doing that a lot lately. It really upsets you, and she's really got to stop. After all, she's your moirail, and you sir are a prime example of why paleships exist. When megalomaniacal teenage supervillains like yourself are left to their own devices, they start doing things they shouldn't.
Like busting down the doors of another troll's hive with the intent of threatening to cull them. Or sexually harassing said other troll. And consequently facing some serious retribution for said sexual harassment.
But for right now, you only want to chat with Vriska. Oh wait, you can't because she blocked you.
Okay, now what?
You know she's been in an unspecified relationship with some other troll; a landdweller. A lowblood. A land-dwelling lowblood. You don't know a whole lot about this guy, but you've pretty much decided you already hate his guts. After all, he's the asshole who replaced YOU as Vriska's caliginous crush. You assume that's why he is with her, because you vaguely remember hearing of him having a serious injury caused by her, though she actually meant to kill him. But since she apparently let him live, your best guess is that it was so his injury would remind him daily of just how deeply in hatred he is with her. So she could continue to despise him and let him despise her, and the two would be able to hate each other with a black, black hatred that burns with the infrared flames of kismesissitude.
That makes you hate the other guy. But only in a platonic way of course.
Anyway, back to the task at hand; get in touch with Vriska. But she's blocked you ages ago. You have to reach someone that she knows, and maybe that person can send a message by proxy to her. And before you know it, you two will be starting up a hate-filled conversation packed with insults, biting sarcasm, and more than a few lewd remarks involving buckets.
But who to ask?
You try to think for a moment; after she broke it off with you, Vriska still played FLARP; she and this other teal-blooded troll made up TEAM SCOURGE, while a couple of rust-blood losers went by the name of TEAM CHARGE. The one Charge player is dead, and like hell are you going to ask that other guy. So that just leaves the teal-blood. You remember something about her going blind, and wonder how the glubbin heck she's even going to read your messages.
You go for it anyway. What's the harm in it after all, right?
==>Be Terezi in the present.
You are once again TEREZI. You just got through reading the first few lines of what is to be a wildly entertaining conversation with this berry-punch-blooded fish troll, and after a little cringing at recognizing the owner of the delicious violet text, you decide to have some fun with him.
Or should you say...fin?
No, you shouldn't. That's Eridan's thing. You're not Eridan right now.
GC: UM, WHO 4R3 YOU
CA: the names eridan ampora wwait wwhat are you kidding me howw do you not knoww
GC: HMM...1 DUNNO, 1 TH1NK 1 T4LK3D TO YOU ONC3...
GC: DO YOU R3M3MB3R?
GC: Y34H TH4T'S WH4T 1 THOUGHT
CA: okay ter lets skip the bullshit this is about vvri
GC: WHO >:?
CA: your former flarp teammate
CA: you twwo wwere team scourge together or somethin
CA: i wwant to talk to her but she blocked me a wwhile ago
CA: and lately shes been hangin wwith this lowwblood troll like seriously wwhats his deal
CA: wwhos the other guy shes wwith anywway
GC: SO WHO DO YOU W4NT TO KNOW 4BOUT 4G41N
GC: VR1SK4 OR TH3 OTH3R GUY
CA: both of them
GC: BUT DON'T YOU 4LR34DY KNOW VR1SK4
GC: YOU US3D TO FL4RP W1TH H3R 4ND STUFF TOO, R1GHT
GC: OH W41T SH3 DUMP3D YOU
CA: yeah no thats not wwhat i mean i wwant to knoww about the other guy
GC: W3LL YOU D1D S4Y BOTH
CA: wwell wwhatevver i mean the other guy
GC: WH4T OTH3R GUY?
CA: the one wwith vvri
GC: 'VVR1'? WHO'S VVR1?
CA: you knoww damn wwell wwho i mean cod did you lose your eyes or your glubbin thinkpan do i havve to spell it out for you
GC: DON'T KNOW WHO 'VVR1SK4' 1S 31TH3R.
CA: oh good gog youre so ignorant
CA: dont you remember
CA: bein all team scourge wwith her
GC: S33 WH4T 1 D1D TH3R3?
CA: yeah haha vvery funny you counted out eight 1s just like her thats real cute
CA: i dont care about that ter
CA: i just wwant you to tell me wwhat is her deal wwith this other guy
GC: OTH3R GUY? WH4T OTH3R GUY?
CA: are you glubbin kiddin me you codsucker
CA: the one vvri replaced me wwith
CA: like ivve been tellin you this wwhole glubbin time
CA: her new gog dammed flame
CA: wwho the glubbin hell is he
GC: Y34H R34LLY WHO 1S H3
CA: i wwouldnt be askin you if you didnt at least know somethin asshole
GC: SOM3TH1N 4BOUT
GC: WH4T 4G41N?
CA: about the other guy
GC: WHO NOW?
CA: youre just fucking wwith me arent you
CA: oh thats reel cute
CA: laugh at a guy for tryin to get back together wwith his kismesis
CA: kick a guy wwhen hes dowwn
CA: pour some salt on the open wwound
CA: do you get off on this shit or somefin I mean what the glubbin-
CA: JUST GET TO THE FUCKIN POINT ALREADY AND TELL ME ABOUT THE OTHER GUY
GC: S4Y PL34S3
CA: are you kiddin me
GC: OH COM3 ON, H4V3N'T YOU 3V3R H34RD OF M4NN3RS?
GC: S4Y PL34S3
CA: suck my bulge
GC: YOU W4NT M3 TO H3LP YOU OUT?
GC: YOU WON'T G3T 4NYWH3R3 TH4T W4Y
GC: SO YOU'V3 GOTT4 PL4Y BY MY RUL3S
GC: S4Y PL34S3
You don't know it, but the troll on the other end is banging his head on his computer desk. You have no way of knowing this, but you can tell he's pretty riled up right now. Which is why you're laughing loudly as you type out your responses to him.
CA: okay fine
CA: please ter
CA: please tell me about the other guy
CA: the one that vvri dropped the ball on me just to be wwith
CA: tell me all you knoww about him
==>Be the other guy
You try to be the other guy. You fail. You haven't been given a proper introduction yet. So instead, you act like the other guy is some big secret that you are on the edge of your seat wondering about. Of course, this is a joke, for anyone who's either read Homestuck past Act 5 or read the summary of this fanfiction. Which hopefully, you have done both.
You cannot be the other guy, but the other guy is doing something adorable right now.
==>Go back to being Terezi
You are once again TEREZI. You will now proceed to properly introduce the other guy as you tell Eridan all you know about him. Frankly, a part of you feels genuinely sorry for him.
Not Eridan, the other guy.
GC: R1GHT TH3N. H1S N4M3 1S T4VROS N1TR4M. H3 H4SN'T PL4Y3D FL4RP 1N 4 WH1L3 DU3 TO 4N 1NC1D3NT W1TH VR1SK4
CA: so wwhat happened did she kill him
GC: NO BUT H3 1S P4R4LYZ3D FROM TH3 W41ST DOWN 4ND C4N'T W4LK.
GC: 1T'S K1ND OF S4D R34LLY
CA: do you think i actually care about some dumbass lowwblood loser wwho cant evven wwalk
CA: i mean hell probably get culled for it soon anywway really wwho evven cares
GC: GOOD GOD YOU'R3 SUCH 4N 4SS 1T'S NO WOND3R YOU C4N'T G3T 4 M4T3SPR1T
CA: oh shut up ter am i honestly supposed to feel bad for a guy wwhos probably the reason vvri dumped me in the first place
CA: if anything he probably deservved wwhat he got
GC: VR1SK4 DUMP3D YOU B3C4US3 YOU'R3 4 M3G4LOM4N1AC4L PR1MM4 DONN4
GC: 3V3N A HUG3 B1TCH L1K3 H3R C4N'T ST4ND YOU
GC: 1 DON'T KNOW WH4T H3R D34L 1S W1TH T4VROS THOUGH
CA: i am not a primma donna i mean wwhat evven is that anywway is that evven a thing
CA: probably not you probably just made it up because youre not as scholarly and advvanced the wway i am
CA: honestly im askin for help here and all you wwant to do is upset me and get up in my gills
GC: W1LL YOU SHUT UP 4LR34DY!
GC: 1T'S NOT L1K3 H3 W4NTS H3R 4ROUND
GC: P3RSON4LLY 1 TH1NK H3'S JUST SC4R3D OF H3R
GC: BUT H3 C4N'T WORK UP TH3 N3RV3 TO T3LL H3R TO L34V3
GC: H3'S K1ND OF 4 PUSHOV3R
CA: but she must hate him enough to replace me wwith him as her kismesis
GC: N4H, NOT R34LLY
CA: so then shes in lovve wwith this guy
CA: like red lovve
CA: a matespritship
CA: this pathetic lowwblood douche is her neww ...
CA: are you kiddin me
GC: 1 N3V3R S41D TH4T
CA: so wwhat is he then
CA: he aint her matesprit but he aint her kismesis either
CA: but hes got to be something wwith vvri i mean shes wwith him a lot isnt she
CA: wwhats he got that i dont wwhats his deal
GC: 1'M NOT SUR3
CA: oh come on you gotta knoww somethin about him you evven said you did
GC: 1 S41D 1'D T3LL YOU WH4T 1 KNOW
GC: 1 DON'T KNOW 4 WHOL3 LOT
CA: wwell can i at least talk wwith this guy
CA: ask him wwhat his deal is and wwhat hes doin wwith vvri
CA: maybe get a straight answwer wwhether hes red or black wwith her
CA: i mean cod you sure wwerent vvery helpful to me
GC: YOU'R3 W3LCOM3 NUMBNOOK
CA: okay fine you wwere
CA: wwell at least you wwere in your owwn wway
CA: so yeah wwhatevver thanks for that
GC: 4WW, YOU S41D TH4NK YOU 4ND 1 D1DN'T 3V3N 4SK YOU TO!
GC: M4YB3 YOU 4R3N'T 4S B1G OF 4 J3RK 4S 1 THOUGHT
CA: wwell yeah see
CA: i mean i can be nice sometimes and wwhen i am no one evven appreciates me
CA: i mean i admit im an ass a lot but its only because im lonely and misunderstood
CA: and its hard growwin up and all i got is my moirail wwho doesnt seem to wwant to talk much lately and ivve been gettin red feelins for her but its awwkwward tryin to say it to her because i get all tongue tied wwith wwords an stuff
CA: and then theres vvri i mean cod wwe actually had a thing goin ya knoww
CA: like wwe wwere a special kind of kismesissitude together
CA: wwe wwere evven wworkin on a cool doomsday machine and i admit it wwas only an excuse to be wwith her but dont tell her i said that
CA: she made such a good rivval and i lovved wwhat wwe had
CA: but noww shes off in wwho knowws wwhat quadrant with some douchebag lowwblood so wwhat do i mean nothin noww like cod its so depressin wwithout her or anyone to talk to because no one wwants to talk to me or hear wwhat i havve to say...
Oh geez when will it end! If it weren't for the tasty wild berry punch flavor, you'd never sit through his text. It might not be the decadent red you love so much, but it's new and it's different. But seriously, you cannot believe your tongue. What a little fussyfins this guy is! No wonder even Vriska couldn't stand him!
CA: ...but you knoww it wwasnt all that great like he made it out to be so wwhats the point wwith that stupid landdwwellers carbonated sugary drink anywwavves
GC: H3Y 3R1D4N?
GC: 1F 1 D1DN'T KNOW B3TT3R, 1'D S4Y YOU M1GHT H4V3 F33L1NGS FOR TH1S OTH3R GUY
CA: wwho you mean that stupid glubbin subjugglator wwhos alwways high on soper slime are you glubbin serious
GC: NO, 1 M34N T4VROS.
GC: YOU S33M TO R34LLY HOLD 4 GRUDG3 FOR H1M 'T4K1N 4W4VV3 VVR1' 4ND 4LL
GC: M4YB3 YOU'V3 FOUND YOURS3LF 4 N3W K1SM3S1S >;]
CA: dont be ridiculous ter as if id evver hit it off wwith a lowwblood
CA: a lowwblood wwho convvinced vvri to dump me
CA: so i hate the guy doesnt mean its a romantic kind of hate
CA: id nevver be wwaxen caliginous or evven pale for anyone that loww on the hemospectrum reely wwho the glub to you take me for
CA: im eridan fucking ampora
CA: i wwould nevver stoop that loww
CA: dont you evver insult me like that
GC: D1D YOU KNOW TH4T 1 C4N SM3LL L13S?
GC: TH3Y ST1NK!
GC: 4ND YOURS 1N P4RT1CUL4R R4NK OF SUCH 4N ODOR TH4T ONLY COM3S FROM 4 V3RY T3RR1BL3 L14R
CA: wwhats this youre talkin about noww wwith smellin a lie and im not lyin ter i mean it
CA: running through my vveins is some of the highest noblest kickass royal blood the hemospectrum has to offer
CA: you should be grateful to evven be readin my wwords in this awwesome vviolet color
GC: 1 4M
GC: 1T'S D3L1C1OUS
GC: SUCH A YUMMY W1LDB3RRY PUNCH COLOR!
CA: yeah wwhatevver see
CA: you understand
CA: noww make no mistake i wwould nevver sink to such a loww levvel as to let a lowwblood take up space in one of my quadrants
GC: 1F TH4T W4S TH3 C4S3, YOU WOULDN'T B3 H4V1NG TH1S CONV3RS4T1ON R1GHT NOW
GC: L1K3 1 S41D, M1ST3R 4MPOR4
GC: 1 C4N SN1FF OUT D3CE1T
GC: 4ND TH3 TRUTH OF TH3 M4TT3R 1S
GC: YOU 4R3 D3C31V1NG YOURS3LF
CA: no no NO
CA: i most certainly am not
CA: im dead serious about this ter i wwant to get to the bottom of all this and havve a talk wwith this guy
GC: FOR WH4T
GC: DO YOU HON3STLY TH1NK YOU C4N JUST 1NT1M1D4T3 H1M OR WH4T3V3R 4ND SOM3HOW M4K3 H1M TURN H1MS3LF 1N TO G3T CULL3D SO YOU C4N H4V3 4R4CHN4B1TCH 4LL TO YOURS3LF?
GC: DO YOU 3V3N H4V3 4 PL4N?
CA: wwell of course i do
GC: WH4T 1S 1T?
CA: complicated shit you wwouldnt get because its wway ovver your head
GC: TH4T W4S TH3 WORST L13 1 H4V3 3V3R SM3LL3D
GC: 1N 4LL MY SW33PS 4S 4 L3G1SL4C3R4TOR!
GC: 1F YOU'R3 GO1NG TO BULLSH1T 4T L34ST M4K3 1T MOR3 SUBTL3
GC: S3R1OUSLY 1 C4N H4RDLY M4K3 OUT TH3 W1LDB3RRY PUNCH 4NYMOR3
GC: 4LL 1 SM3LL 1S YOUR R4NC1D D3N14L 4ND BL4T4NT L13S
CA: okay fine so i aint gpt the slightest glubbin clue howw im evven gonna do this
GC: H3H3H3 Y34H Y4 TH1NK
CA: wwell dont be all rubbin it in
CA: i mean if you got anythin better in mind be my guest
GC: HOW 4BOUT TH1S
GC: WH4T 1F YOU 4SK3D H1M TO M3ND YOUR R3L4T1ONSH1P W1TH VR1SK4
CA: you mean like as an auspistice
CA: wwhat kind of plan is that i already said im not fillin a quadrant wwith this guy
CA: so wwhy wwould i be wwaxin ashen for him
CA: thats the shittiest plan evver
CA: your plan is shit ter it stinks evven wworse than my lies that you supposedly can smell wwhich you cant because really howw is that evven a thing
GC: W3LL 1T'S ST1LL B3TT3R TH4N NOTH1NG, R1GHT?
GC: 4ND YOU 4SK3D M3 1F 1 COULD DO B3TT3R
GC: SO 1 D1D
CA: aww glub i guess youre right fine wwell its not really the same as auspisticism i just wwant him to break it off wwith her so shell take me back
CA: and if he doesnt go wwith it ill threaten to turn him ovver for culling
CA: or maybe just do the cullin myself
GC: YOU KNOW 1T'S R34LLY H4RD TO F33L SORRY FOR YOU WH3N YOU'R3 SUCH 4 PR1CK
GC: YOU KNOW TH4T R1GHT?
CA: wwell ter its still a plan and you wwere right its better than nothing
GC: SO L3T M3 G3T TH1S STR41GHT
GC: YOU W4NT TO M3SS4G3 T4VROS 4ND THR34T3N TO CULL H1M 1F H3 DO3SNT BR34K UP W1TH VR1SK4
GC: 4ND ONC3 H3 DO3S TH4T YOU 4R3 GO1NG TO SOM3HOW G3T 1N TOUCH W1TH H3R
GC: D3SP1T3 TH3 F4CT TH4T SH3 BLOCK3D YOU
CA: oh yeah
CA: so noww wwhat
GC: HMM 1 DUNNO
CA: wwell thanks for nothing ter
GC: N1C3 TO KNOW YOU 4PPR3C14T3 WH4T OTH3RS DO FOR YOU
CA: i knoww
CA: say i go ovver to his hivve and givve him an ultimatum face to face
CA: i can use his account and pose as him wwhile talkin to vvri
GC: W4NT M3 TO T3LL YOU WH3R3 H3 L1V3S?
As Terezi, you personally consider this idea to be very stupid. But the idea of all the wonderful and hilarious things that could happen if Eridan just happened to break into Tavros' house...well, it's just too much to resist.
So you then consign Tavros to a fate of having Eridan Ampora invade his hive, his personal space, his account, and eventually one of his quadrants. But of course you are not worried, only amused at the ensuing trainwreck.
CA: so yeah anywway thanks for the help
CA: i mean it wwas awwfully nice of you and all
GC: 4WW, YOU'R3 W3LCOM3 3R1D4N
CA: you knoww ter youre not so bad
CA: i mean for a landdwweller anywway
CA: and shore its not as great as someone as high up on the hemospectrum as me
CA: or you knoww fef
CA: but you seem kind of cool
GC: H3H3 TH4NKS
CA: so i wwas just thinkin
CA: wwould you evver consider fillin a quadrant wwith me
CA: or maybe fillin somethin else
CA: if you knoww wwhat i mean ;)
gallowsCalibrator [GC] blocked caligurasAquarium [CA]
Well, so much for that plan. Oh, and by the way, you're Eridan again. And your advances are really kind of creepy. Seriously, you need to stop doing that.
You probably also need to stop banging your head on the desk (which you're currently doing right now, by the way), as you're bound to incur some damage to your thinkpan, and as it stands, you're already going to do something horribly stupid. Who knows, if you give yourself enough of an injury to the head, it might partially explain the mild borderline derailment your character seems to be facing.
You hear a ding from your computer.
gallowsCalibrator [GC] unblocked caligurasAquarium [CA]
GC: OH Y34H, H1S H4NDL3 ON TROLL14N IS '4D1OSTOR34DOR', OR 4T.
GC: JUST 1N C4S3
gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling caligurasAquarium [CA]
gallowsCalibrator [GC] blocked caligurasAquarium [CA]
You adjust your glasses in a rather grandiose fashion as you try to make out the name she left you using her stupid 'NUM3R4LS OF TH3 BL1ND PROPH3T'. You're not even sure if he's online right now. Okay, so you know that adiosToreador is a lowblood. So just how low, exactly?
You scroll down a list of other handles. He's logged on, but not currently active. You see the name Terezi gave you.
Oh. Cod. No.
The handle is in brownish orange text. That's the second-lowest swill on the spectrum! And that little shit is what Vriska's replaced you with?! A fudgeblood? A crippled fudgeblood? A crippled fudgeblood that she crippled?!
You don't know who to hate more; the other guy or Vriska.
You can just see yourself heading over to her hive, kicking down her door, storming up her stairs, giving her a death glare the Horrorterrors would shudder to see, backhanding her across the face with your beringed hand, and telling her just what an outrage this all is. She'd retaliate with a sucker punch to your mouth, and pretty soon, the two of you would then escalate it into a fistfight, a shouting match, with objects flying, hair pulling, windows breaking, cerulean and violet blood dripping...
...until one of you notices a pail lying in a corner. You look at her, and she looks at you. You are both thinking the same thing.
That's when the caliginous black flames are rekindled, and before you know it, you're-
Okay stop it already! Do you really have to get into all the gross details? We get it already, you're jet black for this girl. The author personally regrets putting that bit of blackrom troll porno in here. Really, why did I do that? What is wrong with me?
Well, whatever. You shake your head and realize that you're not there just yet. You aren't even sure this is going to work.
Okay, before you start having more hate-porn fantasies about Vriska, you go off and be the other guy.
==>Be the other guy
Your name is TAVROS NITRAM. You don't know it just yet, but you are about to have a bit of a bad day.
Of course, you're paralyzed from the waist down and are tormented by Vriska on a daily basis, so just what qualifies as a bad day for you would really have to be an exceptional level of going from bad to worse.
Alright, so it's about to be bad in a kind of typical way, but not really in the way you're used to.
You hear the ding indicating that someone's messaging you on Trollian. You just hope it isn't Vriska as you wheel your way to your respite block.
It isn't Vriska. Well, that's good, you guess. But you haven't heard of this guy before. Just who is he?
caligurasAquarium [CA] began trolling adiosToreador
CA: hey there codsucker you must feel real smug takin vvri from me
CA: you should knoww you dont deservve her and im coming ovver to your hivve right now
CA: i wwill fill my pail wwith your blood
CA: oh shit forget i wwrote that
CA: so yeah i hope you can run fast cause i wwill be there
You're blushing like crazy now. Of course, that was actually a death threat, but it came off more like he was flirting with you. You know, in a caliginous way. You really aren't thrilled about this at all. In fact you are scared almost shitless.
It's not anything personal against him, it's just that you never really were the type to hate anyone. Not even the person who crippled you. That, and you have a rather crippling fear of romantic encounters. It tends to turn you into a stuttering, faltering, verbal-backpedalling mess. Even more than usual.
So you try to talk things over with this guy.
AT: uHH, hI THERE, wHOEVER YOU ARE,
AT: SO i UH, gUESS MAYBE THERE'S A MISUNDERSTANDING,,,
AT: aND UH, nOT TO BE MEAN, bUT i REALLY, UH,
AT: i'M NOT REALLY LOOKING FOR A,,,
AT: uH, wHATEVER IT IS YOU WANTED,
AT: aLSO, i UH, cAN'T ACTUALLY RUN, bECAUSE,,
You would've typed more, but are abruptly interrupted by the sound of your door being kicked open.
"Alright you lowwblooded little shit," the intruder sneers at you, "You can do this my wway, or get culled. Your choice,"