As soon as Mitchell, Teal'c, and Vala had left to go crew the ship instead of leaving Carter to manage the whole vessel on her own, Daniel flung the covers back and sat up. "Move. I've gotta see a man about a euphemism."
"Whoa whoa whoa." Jack was out of the bedside chair and in the same smooth motion pressing him back into the pillow with firm, inexorable force. "You had your little jaunt to the bridge," he said, and pulled the covers back up. "You're on bed rest from now 'til we get back to the SGC. Doctor's orders."
"Doctor Jack. That's what you get for so rudely removing a ship's entire medical complement: Me."
Jack was sitting back down and tilting precariously to the side. Daniel stared at him for a few seconds, unable to fathom what in the world he was doing and curious to see whether he'd actually topple completely over, but he couldn't wait around to find out. "Seriously, Jack. I really have to go."
"And about time, too. Aht! Stay." Temporarily stilled by Jack's raised finger in front of his face, Daniel acquired the perspective to realize that Jack was leaning down to reach the lowest shelf of the bedstand, doing it sideways to keep his approach vector open in case Daniel made a break for it. "You know you didn't take a leak for like sixteen hours?"
"Yes which is why I would very much like to take one now." He started to sit up again, and was frozen halfway by two fingers pressing just above the points of his collarbone. They bore him back down with almost no pressure and no effort. He tried waving two fingers of his own, again, meaning it this time, channeling all of his will into it -- but his Ancient powers were well and truly gone.
Jack hadn't stopped rummaging. "If you technically died again I'm gonna be pissed, y'know. I have a C note riding on that."
"As far as I know, becoming a Prior did not literally turn me into a zombie in the George Romero sense, however much it may have looked that way and however accurate the living-dead characterization may be in metaphor, and I'd appreciate if you'd stop trying to distract me from my bursting bladder with a threat to my airway, because I'm telling you, I can taste -- "
Jack made a triumphant sound and came up with the bedpan.
Daniel said, "No."
Jack said, "Nothin' I haven't seen before," with all the layering of ironic cliché that he was uniquely capable of. "Or, come to think of it, actually held for you when both your hands were bandaged after that -- "
"Fun as all this reminiscing is going to be for the guys who review the surveillance logs? Still gotta pee, still getting up."
"Have you seen your face? You're not running a temperature, so that's one hell of a case of headsuckerburn there, pal. And I saw you grab for that bulkhead."
On the way back from the bridge, Daniel had swayed on his feet. He'd kept going, kept his balance without actually touching the bulkhead, but it was close, and it figured that Jack had noticed. Zapping Adria after overcoming the anti-Prior device and piloting the Ori ship had done him in, and Merlin's consciousness had expended the last of its life-force to roll his body back to its pre-Prior configuration; there was no energy left over to replace his own depleted stores. So, OK. He was a little weak. He felt a little warm. But mostly he just really freaking had to pee.
Their gazes stayed locked for a few more seconds, Daniel's stubborn, Jack's fierce. Then, abruptly, Jack got up. "OK. C'mon. I'll give you a hand."
Daniel flung the covers back again -- forcefully, annoyed at having to do it twice -- and swung his legs over the side of the bed. A wave of dizziness almost convinced him to lie back down again, but he was committed now, and he'd really, really, really had it with being controlled and contradicted and thwarted. He was going to that head under his own power if it killed him.
"A C note here, Daniel," Jack reminded him, as his strong grip under Daniel's elbow propelled him smoothly and steadily to his feet. "C is the Roman numeral for one hundred. That's a hundred buckaroos."
"You draw an obscene salary," Daniel said. Only a few feet. Step by step. "You can afford it."
"Yeah but you know how much I hate losing to Walter."
"Walter bet I would die again?"
"I think it's just wishful thinking. My new office has one of those glass things too ... "
" ... and his desk is right on the other side. That's plenty of information, Jack, thanks."
Daniel got through the open doorway to stand in front of the toilet. Jack came in to stand behind him, and closed the door, and slid arms around to hold him. "No surveillance in here," he said, low against Daniel's ear. "I've gotcha. Let 'er rip."
Daniel pushed down the scrubs that someone had put on him after they beamed him off the Ori ship to reach into the briefs that someone else had put on him after they beamed him up to Odyssey's brig. He pulled himself out, looked down, said, "If you knock my aim off, you're cleaning it up," and let go in a long stream. The release felt as good as orgasm, and he couldn't stifle a moan of relief.
Jack smiled against his ear. "Oh yeah. That was worth the trip."
"You know what they're going to think we're doing in here if they come in and find the door closed."
"And don't think I'm not tempted."
Daniel finished, shook off, tucked, pulled, waved his hand at the one thing his hand could magically control -- the flush mechanism -- and then stood quietly, soaking in the warm strength of Jack's body through scrubs and fatigues, resting his hands on Jack's hands. "I might have really fucked up," he said quietly.
"No 'I' in 'team,' my friend. If we fucked up, we fucked up. We'll find out soon enough, and we'll deal." He pressed his face into the side of Daniel's, eyes closed, and his body relaxed into Daniel's with a deep shudder, releasing weeks of desperate tension. "We've got you back. I've got you back. Right now that's enough for me."
He didn't step away, and no one came calling for them, so for as long as they could, they just stood, heads pressed together, holding on, while the big ship thrummed around them, hurtling through hyperspace, bringing them home.