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Courage, Dear Heart

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Cat waltzed up to Kara’s door, she’d just flown back from France and had jet-lag so she was thoroughly exhausted. But she wanted to surprise Kara and congratulate her on her first story being published which she dedicated to Cat. But this was unlike Cat, to come to Kara’s apartment of all places. She had butterflies and she had no idea why, sure they hadn’t seen each other in a while and it seemed silly to come straight to her place but….

 

Taking a deep breath and exhaling it slowly she looks at the door and goes to knock but her hand stops. She twists her hands nervously and whispers Kara’s name, taking a step back from the door she starts pacing back and forth.

 

“Come on Cat, just knock on the damn door, it’s not that difficult,” she loudly whispers to herself in the middle of the hallway.

 

Sighing she musters up some courage and faces the door, posed to knock but then quickly deflates and rests her forehead against the door.

 

“Since when do I let twenty something year old women give me butterflies?”

 

Before she knows it the door is opening and is falling forward into Kara’s arms, “Oh, my...Cat!?”

 

Cat is clutching at Kara’s shirt and looking up at her in disbelief, words escape her and her heart is pounding. Partly from the fall and mostly to being held in Kara’s surprisingly strong arms. You think she’d remind herself to calm down or actually to not even have said anything out in the hallway. Because even though Kara puts up the charade with her about her not being Supergirl, Cat knows, she’s always known. And she knows that Supergirl, Kara, has super-hearing.

 

Blushing Cat gathers herself out of Kara’s arms and clears her throat, “Kara…..I...surprise?”

 

Kara isn’t wearing her glasses and Cat wants to pull Kara’s face closer and gaze deep into those blue eyes but she’s using all of her self-control. Because yes she has missed Kara very much, that’s partly why she left on her little journey of sorts. To sort out her feelings and perhaps try and rid herself of them. There’s no need for a 50 something year old being in love with a 20 something year old. She’s embarrassed of herself.

 

“Cat, what are you doing here? When did you get back? Uh, why are you here?”

 

Gazing at the girl in front of her Cat takes in her appearance and realizes she’s in a baggie t-shirt and sweatpants and she’s got paint on her shirt. Looking around she spots the canvas over by her window, “You paint?”

 

Kara looks at her and back to the canvas and has no idea what is happening but she nods. Cat thinks Kara looks adorable standing there covered in paint and wearing something that isn’t her Supergirl outfit or a hideous cardigan. Cat makes her way towards the painting so she can see Kara’s talent and if anything it’s nothing less than perfect. And it takes a second for Kara to realize what’s going on and she’s at the painting before Cat can even look at it and stares wide eyed at Cat.

 

“Don’t look, it’s terrible!”

 

Cat returns the same look, “Seriously, Kara?”

 

Kara tries to gather herself and stumbles over her words, “You haven’t even told me why you’re here!”

 

Sighing Cat shifts her stance and puts her hands on her hips, “Well, I saw your first publication Kara. And I wanted to congratulate you in person. I just got back from France and I came straight here from the airport,” being brave Cat took a step closer, “Don’t look so shocked Kara. Now let me see your painting.”

 

“But, no Cat!”

 

Cat managed somehow, like Kara didn’t even try to stop her and the moment she saw what Kara was painting it stole her breath away.

 

“Kara, I….”

 

“I...I’m sorry, I was just thinking of how much I wish you were back at CatCo and I didn’t realize what I was painting until…”

 

Cat stared at a picture of what she assumed was her and Kara’s painting skills were nothing less than perfect, “It’s beautiful, Kara, is this what I look like in that pretty little head of yours?”

 

Nodding Kara blushed, “I just kind of find myself painting pictures of you whenever I miss you. You know, cuz you’ve become such a great friend and mentor and CatCo isn’t the same without you!”

 

“You missed me? That’d make one person I’m sure.”

 

Kara looked behind Cat to the stack of canvas lined up against the wall and her eyes went wide.

 

Crap.

 

Cat noticed her line of sight and turned around to be met with a line of paintings all of her, “Wow, Kara, you must have missed me a lot.”

 

Tears came to her eyes and Cat’s heart hurt and she couldn’t hold back the words that left her mouth, “I miss you so much.”

 

And Cat didn’t care, she didn’t care if it was too weird to say such words, she didn’t care because her heart hurt too much and it began to rain outside. Why did it always seem to rain whenever she cried?

 

“I was hoping that one day you’d come to me and tell me that you miss me,” Kara giggled of course she tried to tell herself its because she’d hoped Cat would come crawling back to her and ask her to be her assistant again.

 

Turning away from Kara’s intense gaze Cat looked out the window and tried to collect herself, keeping her eyes closed.

 

“Falling in love is like jumping off a really tall building or being thrown off; your head tells you ‘idiot you’re gonna die’ but your heart tells you ‘don’t worry pretty girl you can fly’. But in this case I guess that would be you, wouldn’t it Kara?”

 

Cat turns at the feel of a warm hand on her shoulder and sees the brightest sunny Danvers smile directed at her, “All the better to catch you when you fall off tall buildings or are thrown off.”

 

And Kara is pulling her into a hug because she knows Cat Grant craves affection just as much as she does but she doesn’t know how to ask for it. She’s never been allowed to ask for it, the ever stoic and strong Queen of Media she’s been. And Cat’s glad that Kara knows her so well, but the age thing is still nagging her at the back of her mind. But in this moment she doesn’t care because Kara’s strong warm embrace is grounding her and it makes her melt.

 

Cat doesn’t realize how much the adrenaline has worn off and how truly tired she is, “When was the last time you slept, Cat?”

 

“Sleep is for---”

 

“Slackers, I know, you’re so stubborn,” Kara lifts Cat into her arms and Cat doesn’t mind one bit because the moment her head hits the pillow on Kara’s couch she’s out like a light.

 

And Kara gets a chance to paint Cat in the flesh but this one is mixed with a rainbow of colors and spark a that isn’t melancholy. The rain subsides and it’s Kara’s turn for her heart to hurt, she never pictured Cat Grant asleep on her couch in the middle of the night fresh off a plane from France. Then again she never thought she’d have fallen so hard for the woman sleeping on her couch. She knows Cat’s going to have insecurities that she’s going to have a hard time talking about or accepting. But Kara knows her and she has a way of getting into Cat’s bloodstream and making her see things she’s blind too.

 

“I couldn’t get you out of my head, Cat, maybe that’s where you were supposed to be.”

 

Kara’s painting is drying as she goes to change out of her painty clothes and comes back out with a blanket to lay over Cat, taking her shoes off in the process. Kneeling down next to the couch Kara pushes a strand of hair behind Cat’s ear and Kara remembers how she heard Cat’s mumbling out in the hallway. The rush of her heartbeat, the whisper of her name on her lips. She could almost feel her heat through the doorway and she wanted so badly to feel it.

 

Kara’s worried about this, all of this, she’s not sure how this is going to work but they’re both strong women in their own ways. Cat made her stronger and opened her whole world. And she’s sure that she’s been able to do the same for Cat too. They make each other better.

 

Sighing Kara sits and rests her head against the couch, “Courage, dear heart.”

 

And in the morning she begs Cat to pose for a painting for her and she promises that they’ll discuss everything later.

 

“I thought you painted me when you missed me, Kara.”

 

Kara blushes, “I do, did, but now I want to paint you in colors I never knew I could see before.”

 

“In that case, I might end up letting you paint me like one of Leo’s French girls.”

 

Cat winks and Kara gulps.

 

Courage, dear heart.