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The Still of the Silence

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Erwin stood before Levi’s door, the back of his hand resting against the smooth wood. He couldn’t seem to summon the will to knock. He didn’t really know why he was here in the first place.

After the scouting legion returned from its failed mission to capture the female type titan, he’d been forced to hole up in his office and do paper work deep into the night—or was it morning now? All he knew was that he’d spent far too many hours writing far too many death reports, growing wearier and wearier after each one.

He was exhausted. When he did finally manage to knock, it was so weak that at first he was sure it would go unnoticed. But then the door opened just a crack, and there was a brief moment when he could see Levi’s scowling face sour further as he realized who his visitor was. Then there was a sharp thud as Levi made to slam the door shut and ended up catching Erwin’s hand.

Levi was strong, incredibly strong to be so small, but Erwin was also strong, and twice as heavy. He put his weight against the door and pushed back, trying to be considerate of Levi’s injury. That just seemed to make Levi angrier.

Erwin stopped pushing. The door was still open slightly, letting him hear Levi’s harsh, ragged breathing. A few tense moments passed. He waited, expecting Levi to tell him to fuck off or go away.

“I want to see you,” he said after a moment. “To see how you’re doing. Let me in, please.”

Levi didn’t let up.

It occurred to Erwin that perhaps he shouldn’t be here. Perhaps Levi blamed him for the deaths of his squad. That was the only explanation he had for this change between them. However abrasive and insulting Levi might act, he’d never begrudged Erwin’s presence like this before.

He’d never told Erwin no before.

“Let me in,” he said. “That’s an order.”

The door jerked open to reveal Levi, still wearing his clothes from earlier, minus the jacket. He leered up at Erwin with cold eyes before turning and hobbling to his bed.

Erwin shut the door behind him and stayed where he was. Levi was almost infamous for his foul mouth, but he didn’t lash out with a smart remark about Erwin abusing his authority. He didn’t even insult Erwin. He just sat down on the edge of his mattress, looking as enervated as Erwin felt.

“How’s your leg?”

Levi said nothing.

Erwin felt a surge of irritation. The whole ungodly amount of time he’d spent in his office he had been worried about Levi—his leg, his mental state. He’d heard Petra’s father speaking to Levi when they’d returned and, when Levi remained silent, refusing to tell the poor man what had happened to his daughter, Erwin intervened on his behalf. Breaking the news to Petra’s father had been hard enough. Worrying about Levi had almost driven him up the walls.

He went to Levi and sat down beside him, the bed creaking under his weight. The silence was stifling. Levi tugged at his cravat, loosening it up and deftly undoing it. Something about it made Erwin’s temper flare. He grabbed the cravat and used it to yank Levi’s head up so they were face-to-face. “Damn it, Levi, say something.”

Levi’s hands were around his in an instant, clawing at his fingers.

“If you think this mess is my fault, then go ahead and blame me. I want to hear you.”

Levi punched him in the face, his fist connecting squarely with Erwin’s jaw. Erwin let go of his cravat, grabbed him by the shoulders, and shoved him down onto the bed. They thrashed together for a few minutes, Erwin not entirely convinced that Levi was trying to push him away. If anything, if felt as if Levi had been waiting for a good reason to lash out at him.

He started when Levi tried to knee him in the groin, worried that he was going to aggravate his injury. Levi took advantage of his distraction and kicked him in the chest with his other foot.

I deserve this, Erwin told himself as Levi continued to fight him in utter silence.

They were both breathing hard and starting to sweat when Levi finally settled down. He rolled onto his side and sat up, unbuttoning his shirt with his back to Erwin. When he was done Erwin took hold of the sleeves and helped pull it off. Levi glared at him over his shoulder, but put up no resistance when Erwin put a hand at his waist, urging him onto his back.

Erwin undid his belt and dropped it to the floor. Levi continued to glower, but he let Erwin slide his pants down his legs. As he got to the brace Erwin felt a cruel impulse. Before he could stop himself he yanked Levi’s pants the rest of the way off. His intentional carelessness made Levi let out a hiss of pain. He even dug his fingers into the sheets and closed his eyes, but he didn’t say a word.

Erwin was starting to get angry.

He settled on top of Levi and kissed his throat, taking care to keep himself propped on his elbows. He moved to Levi’s jaw, then his lips. Levi let his tongue in willingly enough, but after a moment of light kissing he bit down hard. Erwin bit back harder. Judging by the sharp way Levi flinched, he hadn’t been expecting that.

Erwin sat back on his knees and stared down at him. Levi wiped at his reddening mouth, the rage clear in his eyes. He tensed when Erwin slid his underwear off, as if anticipating that Erwin was going to jostle his leg again, but Erwin took care to be more thoughtful this time.

Once they were both naked Erwin leaned over to the nightstand and opened the drawer, feeling around for the jar of lube he knew Levi kept there. He lubed the fingers of his right hand and unceremoniously slid one in Levi’s hole. Levi grimaced, squirming at how rough Erwin was being. He was barely aroused. When he made to touch himself Erwin swatted his hand away.

“I’d be more than happy to do that for you,” he said, slipping a second finger into Levi’s ass and probing until he found his prostate. Levi’s legs tightened, caging around Erwin’s torso. He pumped Levi’s cock once, twice before letting go. He leaned down until their lips almost met and murmured, “But you have to tell me what you want.”


Erwin was growing tired of the cold shoulder game. He took his fingers out and lubed them again, slicking his cock. There was a definite tinge of apprehension in Levi’s eyes as he watched, but he was too damn proud to say anything.

He set his cock at Levi’s entrance, waiting a moment to see if Levi would stop him before pushing all the way in with one slow, smooth stroke. Levi bit down on his lower lip, something akin to a groan slipping out when Erwin pulled out and thrust back in, immediately setting a rough pace. For a while the only sound in the room was the slap of their skin. As it became evident that Erwin had no intention of slowing down, Levi arched his back and threw an arm over his mouth, biting down onto the back of his wrist.

He was so goddamned stubborn. Erwin didn’t know if Levi was still mad at him or if he was just being difficult out of spite. He fucked harder, driving into Levi’s tightness as hard as he dared. Levi pulled his head down and kissed him, all teeth and no finesse. Erwin could taste the slightest bit of blood on his lips from where he’d broken the skin of his hand.

He ran a hand up Levi’s good leg, caressing the bruises left by the 3D maneuver gear. He’d been tangled in Levi’s legs enough times to know how powerful they were. It honestly hadn’t surprised him when he’d learned that Levi managed to get away from the female type titan with his leg intact, albeit injured.

He rolled his hips, thrusting until Levi was bent nearly in half. Levi wrapped his good leg around Erwin’s waist, leaving his other one sticking out awkwardly to the side. The position must have been uncomfortable, perhaps even painful. He buried his head face in the crook of Erwin’s shoulder to stifle his moans. Erwin began to pump his cock again, determined to wring at least one “fuck” or “holy shit” out of him before they were through. Levi bit him instead, digging his teeth into the skin of his muscled shoulder.

He was close. Erwin stopped jacking Levi off, sliding his hand up Levi’s short torso to tease his nipple. He thrust a few more times and stilled, tilting his head back slightly as he came. Levi thrashed underneath him, his cock still erect.

They were both gasping. Erwin pulled out and settled onto his side, taking Levi’s cock in his hand and stroking it. Levi was always the louder one when he came, as if he wanted everyone in the building to know what they were up to on those rare, quiet evenings when they could be alone. He opened his mouth as he neared his orgasm, bucking into Erwin’s touch.


“What was that?”


Erwin stopped, slowing until he was stroking Levi’s cock almost lazily. Levi gave an unintelligible half-scream in frustration, his face flushed and sweaty. Erwin quickened his pace again, Levi thrusting into his grasp. His breath hitched as he came.

Normally after sex Levi would take a shower, but now he curled up on his side, once again facing away from Erwin. His chest rose and fell heavily as he struggled to catch his breath. Sweat beaded all over his lithe body, glistening on his numerous scars and bruises.

Erwin looked him over. He meant to ask, Are you really not going to say anything to me? but he ended up saying, “Do you blame me?”

Levi ignored him.

A few minutes later Erwin got out of bed, stretching before he got dressed. He picked up Levi’s clothes where he’d tossed them aside earlier and set them in a haphazard pile on the nightstand. He left, a small part of him certain that Levi would say something, forgive him.

He shut the door behind him and walked down the hall in silence.


A couple of weeks later, he happened to hear a snippet of Levi and Eren’s conversation as they sat waiting for him.

“Captain, you’re kind of . . . talkative today.”

“Yeah, right. I’ve never known when to shut my mouth.”