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Gifts for a Fool

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The Fool is such a strange creature. He appears when you expect him the least, he talks in riddles or talks not at all. He spins in cart wheels or sits at his Kings feet. He can be a Jester, a Lord, a Prophet and even my Beloved.

All I wanted was a peaceful life surrounded by friends and the people I loved. I often find myself day dreaming of a little cottage near Buckkeep, there’s a small hearth holding a fire which burns quietly. Nighteyes lies nearby sleeping within the reach of the fires warmth, the Fool potters around the Kitchen adding a variety of herbs and spices to the fish cooking on the stove and I fill up our glasses with Apricot Brandy. It’s a small dream of living with the two people I love the most. Nighteyes my wolf companion and the Fool, my Prophet and my beloved.

I haven’t told the Fool that I loved him, I’m afraid he won’t accept my feelings and an awkwardness would grow between our Friendship. Although, I’m sure he notices how I always made excuses to be near him, or how I hug him for a little longer than necessary or linger with my hand on his arm. Once, I’m sure I caught him smiling when I made a weak excuse to walk him to his rooms ‘in case the Fool tripped up along the way.’ Our small interactions are enough to sustain me but I feel like I’m hiding something important from the Fool.

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Recently things had grown astray between me and the Fool as I had betrayed his trust by intruding on his personal life. It was a day where I was searching all over Buckkeep to find him, I finally ended up by the door outside his room. I knocked twice to no reply. Curiosity overcame me and I decided I’d want to know more about my lifelong friend. After all, we were so close with no secrets between each other, why should I not look inside to see if I could find him? Upon opening the door I realised my mistake. This was a private area for the Fool. No one else had been inside this room and it was his place where he could relax and unwind on his own. I glance around taking in the delicate curtains covered in patterns of birds, the flowers and plants which littered his bedside and window ledge, the fish bowls and intricate carved wooden sculptures. I gasped. One of his carvings showed the face of Nighteyes, the Fool and I. Did he love me back or was this just a show of our friendship? I shut the door behind me, embarrassed on how I had intruded the Fools personal space. I hoped he would never notice.

My hoping wasn’t enough. A week later the Fool approached me, red faced and angry. I instantly knew what this was about. ‘Fool, please forgive me, I was trying to find you and thought you might be inside..’ He didn’t look convinced. ‘And what do you think? Will you laugh at me for my possessions or mock me? Did you not think to ask before entering, did you not think that I could have a place to solely call my own that I would want no other to see?’ I knew how badly I had hurt him. ‘I would never mock you Fool, I found your room beautiful, I know it was wrong to be there without you and I have no excuses, I’m sorry.’ I could tell he had expected me to insult him and laugh at him, but the fact that I apologised made him sigh with relief. ‘You know I’d never do this to hurt you, Fool?’ He nodded once and smiled. ‘Thank you Fitz.’

When he departed I knew he was still hurt from the intrusion and the break in trust. I resolved that I’d make it up to him and show him just how much I cared and was sorry.

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I held a small gift in my hand. I wanted to tell the Fool I was sorry and show him that I loved him. After all the pain I’d given him I think it was time to finally make things right again. The gift was delicately wrapped in a misty blue paper patterned with flowers, I had placed a white bow over the wrapping and written to the Fools name on top. Inside were three candles of white and blue, they were entwined. The white signified the Fool and the royal Buckkeep Blue signified me. The White Prophet and his Catalyst. I left the present on the entrance to his door and then fled. He could open it and wonder who it’s from. Over the next couple of days I left similar presents on his doorstep, colourful feathers, wooden carvings and intricately patterned scarves.

On another day I bought a gift of Flowers, water lilies and orchids of every colour, along with some Apricot brandy. Instead of stopping at the door to his bedroom, I once again decided to go in. This time I strode towards his bed and sat myself in the middle waiting. It was hours before the Fool returned. I imagined him seeing me there and chucking me out, feeling hurt once again. I imagined him seeing me and turning off to run away, unable to bare the sight of me sat in his private room. When he finally entered the reaction was much different to what I had expected. He startled to see me there and at first looked angry, then he noticed the gifts in my hand. ‘Fitz!’ There were tears in his eyes as he worked out who had been buying him gifts. ‘So you were the one buying me such pretty presents, I thought I was deceiving myself in thinking that you cared.’ I looked into his pale eyes clouded deep with worry. ‘Oh Fool, you don’t understand how deeply I do care, I couldn’t bear knowing how I’d betrayed your trust and hurt your feelings.’ The Fool walked closer and pulled me into an embrace. ‘Fitz, you truly amaze me. Just when I think I understand you, you turn things around once more. I’ve forgiven you. When you spoke those kind words to me and said you found my room beautiful I forgave you.’ ‘Fool, I love you and I love everything that belongs to you, your room isn’t shameful it’s stunning, you’ve collected many possessions which have a lot of meaning to you and to me this room radiates more ‘Fool’ than even you yourself do.’ I’m not sure if he understood my meaning but he hugged me tighter. ‘Thank you Fitz, I have seen every aspect of your life too and I love every part.’ I took a long breath out and smiled, I turned my head and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. ‘I have always loved you Fool’ ‘And I have loved you too Fitz.’

He turned his head to meet mine and our lips met.

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In the days that followed me and the Fool were at peace. We didn’t openly acknowledge our love to the others but I am sure they guessed through our actions. There would be a meeting with Kettricken, Verity and Chade where the Fool would rest his head upon my shoulder or where I’d caress his hand. There’d be an outing where me and the Fool would hold hands and laugh delightedly in each other’s company. We had grown so close and had no secrets from each other, finally The White Prophet and his Catalyst were truly together.

This wasn’t told in any Prophecies between the Prophet and the Catalyst, but the joining was too true to deny.