Fox News Stunned
Steve sat at the kitchen table and stared at the newspaper. Thoughtfully, he turned it ninety degrees.
No, it still didn't make sense.
Normally, he liked newspapers. They were refreshingly still the same. Oh, there were color ads and things, but for the most part they'd stayed untouched by time. It was reassuring to hold a piece of print in his hands and know that thousands of other people were doing the same thing, and had done the same thing the whole time he'd been in the ice.
Then things like this were printed, and he didn't know what to think.
"Hey, Cap!" Spider-Man dropped in from the ceiling to crouch on a chair, his sealed mug of cocoa safe as he twisted around. "Something wrong with the paper?"
"Massachusetts legalized gay marriage. I thought marriage was supposed to be gay." Happy marriages made for happy families. At least, that's what people used to say back when he was a boy. And the married people he'd met in the modern age seemed cheerful...
The silence said that, again, he'd stepped into something. The eyes of Peter's mask were comically wide. Steve felt the vertigo that came with being completely out of touch. Experience let him put down the paper. "What do you think I just said?"
"Marriage is supposed to be gay."
"And it's not?"
Spider booties squeaked against the chair as Peter fidgeted. "Well, it's not supposed to be, but it can be now and..." He looked around with an air of desperation. "Oh, look, Jarvis is baking cookies gotta go bye!" There was a blur of red whizzing through the air, and Peter was gone.
That... was not helpful. Steve picked up the newspaper with its headline helpfully folded at the top, and went to find the one person who would always answer his questions.
Tony was, of course, in his lab, half-way down some sort of giant engine or another. It looked big enough to power all of Manhattan. He was bent at the waist, feet barely touching the ground as he reached deep inside. Steve paused in the door and averted his eyes to contain the on-coming blush, then cleared his throat. "Tony?"
"Oh, hey, Steve! Give me just a minute, I... almost... have it!" Tony's feet picked up as he started to slide. Steve dived forward, grabbing him by the back of the shirt and hauling.
They crashed to the ground together, a weathered and dirty washer still gripped in Tony's hand. Oil was smeared over his nose like and in Tony's hair, making the front stick up in spikes. The rest of him was equally filthy, covered in the grime and grease that tended to show up any time Tony had a moment to himself. He grinned and held up his prize. "Got it!"
"Good for you." Steve rubbed his back. Tony's elbow was digging into Steve's hip, but otherwise he was practically in Steve's lap. It was nice, though he was going to have some bruises.
Before Tony could get up, Steve shoved the paper in front of him. "What's this?"
Tony took the paper and hummed. "Good for them. I heard about this, but I didn't think they'd— it's same-sex marriage. I guess it's on its way in."
"Same-sex marriage. As in, homosexual marriage?"
Steve took the paper from Tony, reading the headlines in a whole new light. A new, very good light. "And homosexuals are legal now? It's okay?"
"Not everyone would say it's okay, but yeah. Legal."
"Huh." Steve glanced at the ceiling, then down at the grimey back of Tony's neck.
He wanted to bite it.
And now he could.
It was the best news he'd heard since he'd been pulled from the ice. "Would you like to go for a burger? My treat."