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Let It Be Me

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The scariest moment of his life—after a year of touring with Adam—was when he had finally gotten up the guts to come clean to Adam about his sexuality. He'd been terrified, but had felt so guilty about lying to Adam all that time—not that he'd meant to, not that he’d called himself straight—but that he was keeping secrets, and it was eating him up inside. So one day, when he'd been hanging out in Adam's hotel room, he'd decided it was time to grow some balls and talk about things like a mother-fucking adult, instead of hiding like a scared little kid.


" You’re fidgeting," Adam comments.

Tommy makes himself look away from the TV. He let Adam pick the movie, and so far, he hasn't taken in a single second of it, even though he's been staring at the screen, his mind full of too many thoughts."I'm not," he denies.


"Yes you are," Adam says firmly and he reaches out, pressing one of his big hands to Tommy's knee, stilling it.

Hehadn't even realised he'd been bouncing it, full of nervous energy.He knows he needs to bite the bullet, take this time alone with Adam to talk, but he's so afraid that Adam will be angry, that his friend could come to hate him.


"What's wrong, Tommy Joe? Are you bored of the movie?We can watch something else if you want… or go out," Adam offers.

The coward inside of himself wants to take the out he's being handed here and pretend it's just the movie that has him so restless, not the fact that he has to talk to Adam about what's bothering him. But not telling Adam has been keeping him up at night—not thathe sleeps well to begin with. He's talked to Mike about it, and Mike keeps telling him to man up and just do it, and it'll all be okay.Maybe it will be, maybe he’s just being chicken shit.


"I'm not bored. Um, I… I need to talk to you about something," hesays slowly, staring at his lap as a horrible jittery feeling starts up in his stomach.


"You know you can talk to me about anything, baby, no need to look so worried," Adam says soothingly.

Hetakes a deep breath trying to calm himself down and reminds himself this is Adam, who, sure is his boss, but also his friend and a really good guy, so he's not going to chuck Tommy out of the band or out of his life over this.


"I've not been completely honest with you… with a lot of people… and I don't want to keep lying to you. I feel really, really bad about it, and I don't want you to be mad, but I get it if you are. Okay?" he rambles.


"Tommy, what ever it is, I'm sure it'll be fine. Calm down a little for me okay? You look really pale and stressed enough to explode. Just look at me and talk, I'm not that hard to talk to, right? We talk about all kinds of shit. I'm sure I can handle what ever you need to tell me now," Adam reassures him gently, Adam’s hand still a solid, comforting weight on his knee.

Hetakes another deep breath and makes himself look away from his lap and upat Adam's face. "I'm not as straight as people think I am… well… the fans mainly think I'm gay, but I mean not as straight as you guys think I am."He forces the words out, his palms feel sweaty, but cold at the same time, and he doesn't see any anger on Adam's face, but the shock is clear for anyone to see.


"So you’re gay or bisexual?" Adam asks quietly, he sounds stunned.


"Not really either, I guess. More Bi-curious, which is why I never said anything. I know you’re cool with anyone being whoever they are, but at the same time, I know you've had some bad experiences with straight boys playing around with people. But I'm not like that… I don't want to mess with anyone’s head. I like girls, wome… I date women, but I've felt attraction to men before." He bites his lip, feeling a little sick. Most gay or bi people he knows have experimented young, got it worked out in their heads, worked out what team they played for, but he’d been afraid, scared he'd try something with a guy and not be able to go through with it.


"So you've never dated a man before?" Adam asks.


"No. I didn't want to treat a guy like an experiment, it didn't seem fair. I mean… what if I went home with a guy and freaked out? I'd feel like a total asshole, and I was afraid of how badly the guy would react if I backed out as well. People get mad about that kind of stuff."He takes a deep breath,. He can't remember the last time he was this nervous about something, maybe when he auditioned for Adam's band.


"I get that, being afraid. It's scary when you realise you might be different from other people. And I kind of get why you didn't tell me… your right. I don't like some men who just seem to use men for sex and then decide they’re straight, but that's not the same as trying to figure out your sexuality or being unsure. I know you'd never use anyone,and I'm sorry you felt like you couldn't tell me this."

Adam removes his hand from where it still sat on Tommy’s knee and takes one of Tommy's clammy hands.

He feels a knot of tension start to loosen in his stomach. " You’re not mad at me? For keeping it secret? For not really knowing what I am?" Tommy asks.


"Of course I'm not mad. We're friends, but that doesn't mean we know everything about each other yet.I care about you way too much to care about your sexuality. Not that I'd judge anyone for it, but there is no way I'm judging you. If you don't know what you are for sure yet, that's your business," Adam says firmly.


"I don't even know how to be sure. I mean I know for sure that I like women… and I know I like… you know, I check guys out sometimes and I think about it. So I guess that suggests I do like guys, but I don't know if I can act on it."He sighs, he's never really known what to do, he's been worrying about telling people, but he doesn't have a plan of what to do now that he has told Adam. Sure he finds Adam attractive, likes kissing him When? On stage? If so state that here, but there is no way he's going to experiment with one of his best friends.


"Just take your time, find someone you can trust. I hate the idea of anyone hurting you, so promise me you'll be careful okay?" Adam asks him.


"I'll be careful. I'll probably never do anything about it. I mean… I just don't know if I'm brave enough to try, you know? But if I do I'll be careful, I promise."He finally feels like he can breath a little easier—this was terrifying—but he’s glad that he did it., Adam isn't mad at him for hiding things,isn’t going to judge him for being curious.He’ll just worry—, which is so Adam. He doesn't know why he didn't expect it.


"Good, because I would have to kill anyone who ever tried to hurt you," Adam all but growls.

He doesn't doubt for a second that Adam means every word and he squeezes Adam's hand in his."Thanks, man, for that, and for being so cool about all of this. I was really afraid, guess that was stupid." He smiles softly.


"It wasn't stupid, telling people stuff like this, even if you trust the person, it's still scary to tell people," Adam shrugs.

He leans against Adam—, he's always been a hugger—and he loves that Adam likes to cuddle too. Casual affection is something that has been there between them since the beginning.


"I'm glad I told you," he says firmly.


"I'm glad you told me too."

Adam smiles and then he presses a gentle kiss to the top of his head, more simple affection, but it makes something in his stomach flutter, but he ignores it,


Tommy had thought coming out as bi-curious would be the scariest moment of his life, until now—almost half a year latter. Adam had been feeling restless on their day off, so they had gone out for a walk. It had been going fine until some thuggish-looking guy came out of an alleyway and pulled a knife on Adam.

His heart starts racing in his chest, and he doesn't know what to do., If he moves, the guy could slit Adam's throat. He's never been more afraid, doesn't want to see anyone hurt, but God… Adam. He couldn't stand to see Adam get hurt.


"Give me all your money or I'll cut you," the guy spits out, and before Tommy can react, Adam speaks.


"You'll cut me anyway. I can smell it on you, you want to hurt someone," Adam growls,. His voice doesn't sound right, and Tommy doesn't understand what Adam is saying, how can he smell what this guy is planning.


"I'll fucking kill you both," The guy hisses.

No sooner has he spoken, Tommy hears a noise, a rumbling growl that doesn't sound at all human.


And then Adam is moving, and he wants to yell, so sure that Adam is about to get seriously hurt, but his voice is frozen in his throat. Then something happens that leaves him stunned. Scraps of cloth fall to the ground around Adam, and a fucking huge leopard is left standing where Adam was, snarling up at the asshole with the knife.


Everyone knows about Were animals—they've been around since before he was born: well… they'd been around forever, but they’d only been open and known for about fifty years. He has were friends—but none in his family—and he went to school with were's of all different kinds,. bBut he never knew that Adam was a were-leopard. He can't believe it: Adam is a were and he never told him about it. He can't help but feel a twist of betrayal in his stomach.


"Fuck," The man chokes out.

He can see the darkening stain at the crotch of the man’s jeans as he pisses himself.


Instead of running away—like he thought the man would do—the guy clearly panics as he takes a stumbling step forward, trying to get around Adam.

Still carrying the knife, the man come barrelling towards him. Seeing the blade, he can tell this terrified man will do anything to get past them, and he is sure that at any second he's going to get stabbed. He doesn't have time to move, the man is moving to fast. But Adam—the leopard—is faster, and he lunges and knocks the guy hard to the ground, the knife making a scarping noise as it flies along the sidewalk. Adam’s snarling the whole time.

Looking down at them both, he’s half expecting to see Adam tearing the man to shreds, but it looks like the man’s been knocked out or maybe he's passed out, with Adam on top, claws just pricking through the man's T-shirt.


"Adam?" Tommy says softly and almost has a heart attack when the leopard looks up at him with Adam’s crazy, vivid blue eyes He’s having a hard time excepting the fact that this huge animal in front of him is Adam,. How could Adam have hid this all this time? Why had he not ever known?


"Should I call the cops?" he asks, because he can't believe he's having a conversation with a leopard, it's so fucking crazy. Somehow he’s got to deal with this, but right now he’s in shock over Adam being a leopard and almost getting jumped by a madman with a knife.


Adam sort of nods, moving so that he's sort of sat beside the guy's prone body, but with one huge paw firmly pressed against the man's back. If he was that guy and he woke up, he'd probably piss himself again.


"Don't eat him or anything, okay?" He pulls his cell phone out and looks at Adam. Those teeth look pretty sharp, and he doesn’t want to have to explain a mauled body to the cops.


Adam makes a weird huffing noise and actually sounds kind of annoyed, like maybe he just said something stupid. He ignores Adam, as much as you can ignore a huge fucking leopard, and calls the police.


Trying to explain his emergency should be more complicated, but luckily the police are pretty used to dealing with were's. He has to make sure they get that the leopard isn't the dangerous part of the situation, but the guy knocked out on the ground. Luckily he can see a shops’ security camera nearby, so if he has that to back up his story about the fact they were attacked.


It takes a while before he hears sirens in the distance, but Adam doesn't seem to like the noise, making small rumbling sounds in his chest that make the hairs on the back of his own neck stand up.


"Hey, chill, Adam. It's the police, their coming to help us, so like… stay calm. I don't want them to try and hurt you or anything." He’s worried, even though in most places shifters are treated well, having had to fight for equal rights, but in some places it's still not safe to be a were. Like racism and homophobia, things might have gotten better than they were in the past, but it doesn't mean the hatred and discrimination is gone. He might be pissed at Adam for not telling him he could turn into a leopard, but he still sure-as-shit doesn't want Adam to get hurt—that's still one of his best friends in the world under all that fur.


The police show up and pull their guns. He puts his hands up and shhs Adam when he growls at them.


"I called you… I was the one who called. He's not dangerous," Tommy yells loudly at them, but trying to sound calmer than he feels.


"Does he have his shifter I.D?" one of the cops shouts back.

Looking frantically around on the ground ,he finds Adam's ripped jeans. He fishes Adam's wallet out of the worn pocket and opens it. He’s never really looked at Adam's I.D before—he’s never had a reason to. But when he pulls it out, he spots the small logo in the bottom right hand corner. It's the shifter logo, and stamped in the middle, are the letters WL, marking Adam as a were-leopard. He can't believe he's never even caught a glance of this before—maybe Adam made sure of that, kept it hidden.


He’s just glad that Adam is registered, since some were's hide it t. So Adam might not be telling everybody about what he is, but obviously some people do know—the proper authorities at least. He doesn't know what he would have done if Adam didn't have the right I.D, the cops have the right to shoot an unregistered were if they think they are a threat, and Adam looks pretty fucking threatening.


"I have it," Tommy says holding up the card.


"He going to behave if I come close enough to look at his I.D?" the same cop asks.


"He's not violent, he won't attack you. He was protecting us, because this man attacked us. He had a knife."

The cop starts to creep slowly forward, like he's afraid of startling Adam. {When the cop gets close,he takes the I.D, looking it over carefully before handing it back.


"Alright, it checks out. Can you get him to back off so that we can arrest your attacker?" the cop asks.

"Hey, Adam, time to let the cops take over. Just move away okay?" He hates that his voice shakes a little, but he's feeling so full of emotion that he can imagine bursting. He's shocked—the attack was frightening, finding out that Adam is a were—it’s a surprise, and he feels betrayed. Maybe it's stupid, but he can't help it. Adam is one of his best friends, they've travelled the world together, gone on vacation together, got passed-out drunk together, done so much— just them and with others. He thought that he knew Adam so well, but it turns out he doesn't know how he could have been so wrong.


Adam moves off of the man and backs away from the police officers. They move in and put the handcuffs on the guy and as they drag him to his feet as he starts to wake up.


"Can he shift back so we can talk to you both?" a different cop asks.

He hates the way they all keep talking to Adam like he’s not there or he doesn't understand. Adam understands every damn word, he knows that, but Adam doesn't react to the officer.


"I know it's gonna mean being bare-ass naked in the street, but can you turn back Adam?" Tommy asks.


"I'll get a blanket," the cop offers, going back to one of the cars.


Sitting beside Adam, he watches as his fur seems to melt away, the air shimmering around his body as it shifts, changes shape, turning back from his leopard form to that of a man, the man that he thought he knew as well as himself

"Are you okay?" Adam asks softly, he's looking at him carefully, not taking He his eyes off him when the cop comes back with the blanket. Adam just takes it and uses it to cover his lower body.


Tommy thinks they are damn lucky that the street is deserted, apart from them and the cops, but then he figures that’s part of the reason why they got attacked here. Their attacker had thought there would be no one around to help them, not counting on them being able to help themselves. wWell Adam had done all the work, him and his claws.


"I'm fine. He didn't stab me or anything." He doesn't know why his voice comes out shaky, why he can't look Adam in the eye. He doesn't have a problem with were's or with Adam being one, but he has a problem with secrets. He bared his soul to Adam, told him the secret of his sexuality that he had kept from almost everyone, and Adam had kept this from him.


"You don't smell okay," Adam all but whispers.


"Sniffing for my emotions isn't really fair, Adam. Lets just talk to the cops, okay? Make sure you don't get arrested and then we can talk.," He has absolutely no intention of talking with Adam about how he feels—he’s that hurt and angry.


It's stupid anyway, he's not entitled to know everything about Adam. fFriends have secrets,. jJust because he has a stupidly huge thing for Adam, and tells him everything but the fact he has a crush, doesn't mean that Adam has to do the same. He can't explain his hurt feelings with out explaining the feelings he has.


"Sorry. I wasn't sniffing you. I can't help the things I pick up on," Adam grumbles.


The cops come back, get them to sit in a different car to the man who attacked them. They ask if it's okay to take them to the station and they don't really have any reason to argue. They don't talk throughout the whole drive, and when they get to the police station, they’re separated. They take Adam to get him some cloths, and he’s given coffee before they take him to an interview room.



"My name is detective Lewis. If you can just talk me through what happened today," the detective says calmly.


He takes a breath. "I was out walking with Adam. This guy jumped us, he put a knife to Adam's throat and demanded we hand over all our money or he'd cut Adam's throat. Adam turned, to scare the guy, and the guy came at me with the knife. Adam charged the guy and pinned him to the ground. He didn't hurt the guy… he could have, easily… but he didn't, he just protected us."


"The man who attacked you has a history of robberies, assaults, and is suspected in connection to three deaths. We have no reason to not believe you, so we'll get your official statement, and if he doesn't plead guilty, you might have to go to court, but I don't think it's likely."


Tommy ends up writing everything down as well as he can remember it—all the details that have stayed with him, and then he signs his statement. After that he's lead out of the interview room, and Adam is barefoot, waiting in the main part of the station in an official police department sweater and a pair of sweat pants. He can't help but stare at Adam’s feet—they look delicate, vulnerable even, not like the feet of someone who can turn into a huge predatory animal.


"They said we can go back to the hotel, that they'd call if they needed anything from us," Adam says softly.

He doesn't sound right, not like Adam at all, not happy, or warm and charming. The only way he can describe the way Adam sounds is guilty.

"Okay, we calling a car?" Tommy asks.


"An officer is giving us a ride in a minute. Hopefully no one spots us in a cop car… we don't need this on the news or the internet." Adam sighs.


"It's not like we'd be telling the truth about why we were here," Tommy says. He catches the look on Adam's face—hurt, but guilty again—and it makes him feel shitty, but he doesn't know what to say, how else to react right now.


Some young looking cop comes over to them and tells them he's ready to take them back to the hotel. He finds himself in the backseat of another police car with Adam, this journey as silent as the last one. Normally he has a lot to talk about with Adam, but when there’s silences, he’s they are comfortable ones, but it's not at all like that right now. When they reach the hotel, he gets out of the car without even waiting to see if Adam follows. He's halfway through the lobby when Adam appears at his side, he hadn't made a noise getting close, but then he's a shifter, a big cat, it's an ability that comes with the territory.


"Tommy, we need to talk," Adam says quietly.


"Not now. You need to change before someone notices your cloths and the lack of shoes, and I want a shower… to like process. Some asshole just tried to kill us, and I'm not feeling like having a heart to heart right now."He doesn't want to hurt Adam, and he feels kind of like an asshole, but he’s hurting and he needs time to go lick his internal wounds. With time, he's sure he can pretend that Adam keeping secrets from him hasn't hurt him.


"Oh, okay. You'll come see me latter?"

He just nods, not trusting himself to speak, sure that Adam would hear the lie in his voice. He just wants to get to his room and hide.

They take the elevator together, but they don't talk. His chest hurts the whole time they are alone together and it doesn't let up when he walks out on to his floor, leaving Adam to go up to his. He feels like his heart is breaking even though it has no reason to be. Adam isn't his, never has been, never will be, it's stupid for him to feel like Adam owes him total honesty.


Isaac is asleep in the room they have been sharing when he walks in, and he's glad.He loves Isaac like a brother, but he really doesn't want to talk anybody about anything. He goes for the shower he told Adam he wanted, not wanting to feel like anymore of a liar, and then he puts on some sleep pants, grabs his I-pod and lays down on his bed. He puts his earphones in, cranks up the volume, closes his eyes and blocks out the world.


It's dark when he opens his eyes, and turning his head shows him that the other bed is empty, so he must have fallen asleep at some point. He pulls out his earphones just in time to hear someone knocking at the door. Figuring Isaac has locked himself out of their room again, he gets up and goes to the door, opening it, and expecting to see Isaac looking embarrassed, but instead Adam is there looking as guilty as he had earlier.


"Isaac said you were out of it, so he didn't want to wake you up, seeing as you hardly ever sleep."


Adam looks so awkward, unsettled, not comfortable in his own skin the way he’s used to seeing him. "I feel asleep after my shower." He doesn't know what to say, how to act around him right now.


"Can I come in and talk?" Adam asks.


"Okay." Stepping back, he lets Adam in and goes to sit on the edge of his bed. He watches Adam shut the door behind him and then stand awkwardly with his back to it.


"Are you mad at me because I'm a were? Do you not like were's? I never thought you had a problem with were's," Adam says in a rush.


"I don't have a problem with were's. I know a bunch of them, I'm not prejudice," he says firmly, because it's true, he doesn't have a problem with anyone being a were.

"I didn't think you were, it's just I don't understand why your acting like this," Adam sighs.


"You don't?" Tommy asks, because surely Adam can figure it out.


"No, I wouldn't be asking if I knew."

Adam looks so painfully awkward just standing there that it makes him feel bad. "You lied to me, Adam. You kept a huge secret… and you probably never would have told me the truth if we hadn't been attacked. I know it's stupid to expect you to tell me everything, but I can't help how I feel, and I feel like you've been lying to me about something huge, when you had no reason to."


"I don't tell people, and I don’t want the fans to know. My family does, because well, they were's too. I was born like this,but I didn't want to be known as the were singer… I was already the gay guy from Idol, so I didn't want to be put in another box." Adam groans.


Adam, Neil, Leila, Eber, they're all were-leopards. He can't believe he didn't know—he's spent so much time with them, he feels stupid for not noticing, but he doesn't think he's the only one, he doesn't think Isaac or Ashley know.


"I'm not a fan, I'm your guitarist, your friend. There are things I don't tell the fans that I tell you. I guess I was wrong to think things were the same for you." He can't keep the hurt out of his voice.


Adam looks guilty as hell and moves forward slowly, like he's trying not to spook him or something, and then he comes to crouch in front of him, making sure they are eye to eye. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you. It's not because I don't trust you, I do, I wanted to tell you, but I was scared. I didn't know how you would react."


Adam's eyes are big and bright and so open, and he wants to believe what Adam’s saying, but his faith in Adam has been shaken.


"I was scared to tell you about my sexuality, but I did," Tommy points out.


"I know… and I'm so glad that you told me, that you trusted me enough to tell me and I felt so bad about not telling you. But I was worried. If I let myself be honest with you about what I was, I wouldn't hold back. Part of me is an animal,and I didn't want you to see that part of me," Adam sighs heavily.

"Why not?" Tommy asks, frowning, confused.


"I get possessive… of my friends, of people I'm attracted to. I don't want you exposed to that side of my nature," Adam huffs out.


"Dude, your pretty possessive of your friends’ time as it is… you warned me about that when we started hanging out and I said I was cool with it. It's not like it swings over to controlling or anything bad. But what… because you think I'm hot you might get growly?" Tommy presses.


"I figured you didn't need me getting territorial and warning off men if you were trying to figure out your sexuality. And if I gave in, relaxed and let my animal instincts come out, well… I wouldn't be able to handle other men's scents on you that well," Adam grumbles, looking away.


Something warm and fluttery fills his chest. "Are you trying to say you'd go all alpha animal on me if you didn't have to hide, because you like me?" Tommy asks.


"Yes… and I'm aware how awkward that is. You didn't tell me about maybe liking men because you wanted me to start hitting on you." Adam's cheeks are flushing bright red and he's not even looking at Tommy, but staring at the carpet like it has all the answers in the world.


"Adam," he says softly, reaching out and touching Adam's face, making him look up, so they can look at each other. He's still a little hurt that Adam kept secrets from him, but he's starting to understand why, and he gets it—he kept things to, for similar reasons. "I've had a crush on you from my first audition. I've never been as attracted to a man as I'm attracted to you," he says honestly.Adam surges up and claims his mouth in the sweetest kiss they have ever shared, and it ends far, far too quickly for his liking.


"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have just pounced… it's just I've wanted to kiss you for real for a long time," Adam says softly, one of his hands coming to rest gently on Tommy's knee.


"I kind of like it when you pounce. Really like it. I thought were's could smell things like arousal… have you never smelt it on me before?" he asks.


"I've smelt arousal on you, but I thought it was because of other things, like performing, like I get excited when I sing sometimes. You’re really into playing... and I just, it could have been you reacting to anyone or any thought. I didn't ever think it was because of me… it's been because of me?" Adam looks hopeful and kind of excited.


He wants to kiss Adam,, so he does, cupping Adam's face between his hands and planting one on Adam's mouth, sucking on his lower lip, licking his way inside and Adam groans into his mouth.


"I'll take that as a yes," Adam grins.


"Shit, Isaac's going to be back soon," Tommy realises.


"We ah, could go to my room, I have my own room, if you want privacy," Adam rambles.


"Yeah, lets go to your room." He loves Isaac like a brother, but he wants to be alone with Adam—he's still processing everything, that Adam lied, that he's a were-leopard, that he’s liked,, but he doesn't want to angst about it all anymore, he wants to enjoy it.


He puts on a hoodie over his pjamas and some shoes on his bear feet, then takes Adam's hand and lets Adam lead the way to his own room, to privacy. Adam seems nervous, like maybe he's expecting for him to run away or something, because he seems to settle back into his skin when he gets inside his room and shuts the door behind them both.


"So I know we should probably talk about this, about liking each other and not keeping secrets anymore, but I just really kind of want you to touch me," Tommy admits. And faster than he’s ever seen Adam move, Adam’s in his space, crowding him against a wall.


"I want you so much, and I'm trying to hold back. I know you’re new to this, I don't want to scare you off, push you too far," Adam all but growls out his words.


"I've been holding back for years. Maybe I want to see what I've been missing out on already, maybe I want you to be the one to show me," Tommy says, swallowing, his throat feeling a little dry, but he's a lot turned on and it's kind of thrilling knowing that Adam can smell that.


"Only maybe?" Adam asks.


"Okay, definitely," he says honestly.


Adam attacks his mouth with a growl, kissing him hungrily, and pleasure hums through his veins.He liked it when Adam kissed him when they were joking around, but he likes this more, kissing for real. He never wants Adam to stop touching him and kissing him—Adam's hands on his hip and waist, his lips warm.His heart is racing, and this feels right, so right. He’d been worried it wouldn't, but it really does.


Grabbing at Adam's back, he’s clinging to him, pressing himself closer to Adam's firm body. This feels so good he could do it forever, but he wants to do more than make out with Adam. As much as he thinks he could spend lazy afternoons kissing Adam and nothing more, right now he's hard and aching, he wants more, he's been holding back so long, he doesn't want to hold back when it comes to Adam, not after wasting so much time.


"Adam, I want, please touch me," he pants out against Adam's neck as Adam moves to kiss his collarbone, up to that little patch of skin behind his ear that makes him squirm.


"I am touching you," Adam says softly, his hands tightening slightly on Tommy's hip and his waist.


"You know what I mean, touch more of me, do something," Tommy groans.


"You have somewhere in mind, somewhere you want me to touch you?" Adam asks, his hot breath against Tommy's neck making him shiver.


"Don't be a fucking tease, Adam. Do you know how many times you've made me hard and just left me to take care of myself?" Tommy growls out and Adam moans against his neck.


"That is so hot." Adam sounds almost like he's complaining as he pulls Tommy away from the wall and starts manhandling him towards the bed. He really should have noticed that Adam is stronger than he looks, but he has no problem with it when he ends up on the bed, on his back with Adam kneeling between his knees.


"Jerked off thinking about you all the damn time," he admits, and he's rewarded with Adam's hand on his waistband, pulling his sleep pants down till his cock is exposed to the cool air, but he doesn't have time to worry about the air-conditioned room, because Adam's warm mouth is on his cock in seconds, sucking the head past soft lips, his tongue running over Tommy's cock.


"Oh my God!" he moans, one hand fisting in the sheets, the other clutching at Adam's hair as Adam sucks him all the way down. He doesn't want to be an asshole and pull on Adam's hair, but he needs to hold onto something as Adam shows him just how good he is with his mouth.


"Adam, Christ Adam," he gasps out, pleasure is washing through him, making his heart race.Adam is moaning around Tommy's cock—he's really into this to.


Adam licks and sucks on him, bobbing his head, hands firmly on Tommy's hips, each pressure point of each finger making pleasure course through Tommy. He knew he'd like getting a blowjob, but he didn't realise he'd have a kink for being held down, but he does, and he thinks when he is ready to get fucked,he will enjoy Adam holding him down for it.


He feel his orgasm at the base of his spine, tightening his balls and, he pants, swearing and gasping out Adam's name.He holds on as long as he can, till pleasure overwhelms him and crashes through him. He yelps out a warning, but Adam just swallows around his cock, licking the come off of his skin, making him shiver and shake, it feels so good. It’s too intense, almost painful, but it's the sweetest pain he’s ever felt.


He's still a little dazed when Adam crawls up his body, but the moment that Adam's lips meet his, he kisses back, licking the taste of himself from Adam's mouth, running his hands over Adam's back, his ass and then around to Adam's front, finding Adam's cock through his pants, rubbing at Adam's cock through the material.


When Adam moans into the kiss it makes him feel bolder, so he slips his hand past Adam's waistband to find Adam's naked cock. It's hot and heavy in his hand, bigger than his own, but he already knew that from seeing Adam's hard-on when they were on stage. But it's different to actually feel it, the heat, the skin, and he decides right away that he likes it, likes touching Adam's cock, loves the sounds it has him making. He feels powerful, Adam is this big strong were and he Tommy has him falling to pieces with nothing but his hand.


They kiss, bodies moving together as he jerks Adam off. He hopes he takes to everything else they can do in bed together as easily as he is taking to this— he'd thought being with a man might be difficult, but touching Adam just feels natural.


"Tommy," Adam groans out, his hips jerking, and for the first time ever, he feels another man come over his hand. He kisses Adam through it, moving his hand slower and slower, easing off when Adam makes a small uncomfortable noise.


"That was awesome right?" he says, cleaning his hand off on the covers.He feels a little bad about it, but he's sure this hotel has some industrial style washing machine, no one will have to even touch his come. Maybe next time he'll lick it up or finish Adam off with his mouth, but he's going to be working up to that.


"Yeah, it was. Feel free to tell me to get lost if I'm being too pushy, but I really like you, Tommy. I want you to stay with me. I'm not asking you to promise me forever, just stay in my room with me, give this thing between us a chance," Adam says.

"I want that to, I want to be with you," Tommy says softly, and Adam's smile—it could light up a whole stadium in that moment.


They move around on the bed, getting comfortable, Adam getting the blankets over them and tucking him under his arm. wWhen he starts playing with Adam's, he starts hearing a low rumbling sound and feeling a vibration against his side.


"Are you purring?" he asks, peering at Adam's face—he looks pretty content.


"Yes, is it too weird?" Adam asks, the purring cutting off as he speaks.


"No, I kind of like it, I don't want you to hide anything from me." He doesn’t want Adam to hide what he is when they are together, not anymore.


"Good, I won't," Adam promises.

He goes back to stroking Adam's hair, resting his head on Adam's chest, being lulled to sleep by the sound of Adam's purring and his heartbeat, the combined sound makes him feel safe, connected to Adam. and

This day might have included one of the scariest moments in his life, but he finds he doesn't mind, not when it has ended like this.


The End.