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I don't need you, but i really do

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"Has anyone seen stiles?" Scott asks when he sits down at the lunch table.
"I don’t think he's in today, he wasn’t in history." Lydia chimes in.
"Well he better come to pack night tonight or Derek will be pissed and I refuse to on the receiving end of Dereks grumpiness again." Erica says in a bitchy tone.
"Dude text him Erica has a point Derek takes it out on us when Stilinski ditches." Jackson adds with a grimace.
To: Batman
[Dude where are you? and you need to come to pack night or at least text Derek if you can't.-SM]
"He better not be ditching, I will have to hurt him if he is." Lydia smiles sweetly at the thought.
At the end of the day the pack all head in their separate directions under the agreement they would meet at the renovated Hale house at 18:30. Stiles on the other hand hasn’t left his house all day.
After the nogitsune stiles managed to convince everyone that he was okay, that he had recovered. But he was far from okay, he drowned out the guilt and pain, the residual voices of the monster that took over his mind. He began to waste his days with whatever he found in the cupboards usually a bottle of whiskey, it satisfied him for a while but eventually it just wasn’t enough. He withdrew himself from the pack in favour for going to bars out of town and making out with strangers. When the alcohol began to wear off he found himself needing a better escape so he turned to marijuana, he loved the light buzz he got from it. He would just lounge around, smoke a joint, get the munchies and giggle the night away whilst his friends were out fighting the latest supernatural threat. Then he met Mal George The mysterious guy with long black hair and light stubble. They are the same age and just happened to have snuck into the same club one night. They don’t tend to leave each other's side anymore they choose to spend their days getting as high as they possibly can. After stiles met Mal he began to use the harder stuff despite the fact that his father is indeed the sheriff. Mal hooked him up with his contacts so he is able to get gear when he isn't around stiles has never felt happier. well maybe.
"Dude pass me the ash tray." Stiles slurs and tries to sit up straight. He checks his phone and sees a text from his best friend reminding him about the pack night he was planning on skipping.
"Fuck man I have to go out." He tells Mal in an annoyed tone.
"Ah come on baby your dads on a late shift and we have more shit to sniff." He gives stiles a charming smile to try and persuade him.
"I can't my friends will have a fit if I don’t go tonight. I'll see you tomorrow?" Mal pouts a little causing Stiles to start laughing hysterically. He checks the time 18:05.
"Ah I have a little time before I have to leave, get us a line ready whilst I go change." He shoots a wink at his boyfriend and heads upstairs. He slips on his dark ripped skinny jeans and a red shirt finishing the look with his Mets snapback, converses and a denim jacket. He is pretty sure his friends will notice his change in style. When stiles returns downstairs Mal is on his feet collecting his stuff. They share their last line for the night and enjoy a short make out session before Stiles shows him out. He catches sight of himself in the mirror and sees his pupils blown wide and his eyes bloodshot. He reaches into his pocket and uses his eye drops hoping it will at least help, if not he will avoid eye contact all night. When he steps outside the cold night hits him instantly sobering him up slightly. He can't drive due to his messed up state so starts the trek to Dereks house.
He can't really walk in a straight line so it's taking him a lot longer than usual, he stops half way to light a cigarette savouring it so it can last until he gets to the preserve. He arrives at 18:45 and when he sees his phone he realises he already has some angry texts from Lydia and Erica.
"Sup guys" He calls as he wanders into the living room.
"Stilinski you stink." Jackson says whilst wrinkling his nose, Lydia walks up to him causing him to turn his head away so she doesn’t see his eyes.
"Why are you sniffing me?" He says whilst trying not to laugh at the red head.
"Since when do you smoke? huh? it's disgusting." Stiles snorts and wanders over to the free arm chair that is usually occupied by a grumpy alpha.
"Why weren't you at school?" Scott asks concerned.
"I wasn’t feeling to good this morning and I threw up last night. Dad let me take the day off" Well it wasn’t exactly a lie he just left the part out where he spent all day in bed with his boyfriend snorting coke off of each other's chest and smoking pot.
"You're in my seat." Derek growls out when he suddenly appears in the living room.
"Oops sorry man looks like your taking the floor." He laughs and flips off the alpha. Derek grabs his hand and squeezes it making stiles yelp in pain and move onto the floor, he glares at the smug look on Dereks face deciding to go and raid the alphas expensive alcohol to piss him off a little more. He pulls his flask from his pocket and fills it with the oldest bottle of bourbon he can find, except Isaac walks in on him 'stupid puppy' he thinks to himself.
"What are you doing?" Isaac eyes him sceptically
"Cant and man get a drink?" He retorts with a grin
"Yeah but that Dereks stash he bought us beer."
"what's the point in beer puppy? Sometimes you just got to go a little stronger." Stiles finishes filling his flask and takes swig from the bottle before returning it to its rightful place.
"Why do you have a flask?"
"Why do you ask so many questions?" Stiles snaps back, Isaac looks hurt and puts his head down before grabbing a beer from the fridge. Stiles hates pushing his friends away but they just don’t understand him, seriously how can they possibly think he is okay after the events of the nogitsune? he knows he isn't okay and he needs help but he is quite happy the way things are at the moment, he likes being able to forget for awhile even if that means he only has Mal in the end. Speaking of Mal he hears his phone begin to ring in the other room, he quickly jogs to get it, grabbing it away from Derek who looks as though he is about to answer it.

"Hey man"
"Hey babe, how's your night going?" Stiles heads back into the kitchen to grab his flask and sit on the back porch.
"Shit, I don’t even know why they wanted me here." He giggles
"Just ignore them, that’s what I'm doing with my dad. He hasn’t left me alone since I got in." He hears Mal sigh, he knows how Mals dad treats him.
"If he does anything tell me and head to mine okay."
"Yeah of course, What are you doing tomorrow?"
"Agh I have no idea. You?"
"Picking some stuff up if you want to join me?"
"Sounds good what time?"
"12pm meet me at halls diner."
"You got it, see ya later."
"Bye baby"

Stiles takes a sip from his flask whilst he slips his phone into his pocket before taking out another cigarette and lighting it.
"If you want to smoke you can do it off of my property" A frustrated sounding voice sounds from behind him.
"Nah I'm good here thanks." He replies bluntly
"It wasn’t a request put it out of leave, it irritates our senses." Stiles huffs and purposely puts it out on the wood next to him before chucking it as far as he can.
"You can also hand over the flask." Stiles looks up at Derek and laughs, full on laughs at him.
"And why would I do that?"
"Because you are 17 and you filled it from my alcohol without asking." Stiles looks Derek up and down and without thinking presses his lips to Dereks who kisses back before recoiling and pushing Stiles away.
"You need to leave." Derek orders
"Why the funs just getting started." he taunts
"Leave you aren't welcome here right now."
"Whatever you say alpha." He makes kissy lips before turning around and heading towards the preserve to take a shortcut back to his street.

When he gets outside his house he sees his dads cruiser and groans. He walks in as quietly as he can trying to sneak up to his room without being stopped and moaned at. He doesn’t Succeed.
"Where have you been?" His dad asks from his place on the couch
"I was at Dereks with the pack." He answers truthfully
"I thought you were sick?"
"I was feeling better so decided to hang out with them for a bit." He gives his dad his biggest smile before heading up to his bedroom and locking the door behind him before breaking down and letting loud uncontrolled sobs leave his body.


The next day stiles wakes to his skin itching and his nose burning. he wanders into his bathroom not worrying about being noisy as he knows his dad is already working. He splashes water on his face before jumping in the shower and losing himself to the warm water for half an hour.
He meets with Mal right on time for once and they head off to meet their favourite dealer known as Snake due to his split tongue, the many snakes he owns and his tattoos. When they enter his apartment they are instantly hit with the smell of smoke, the place is a mess. Apparently snake has no idea how to tidy up.

"Mal, Stiles how are you both?" Snake asks with a toothy grin revealing his rotting teeth. Stiles stays quiet always letting Mal deal with the transactions.
"So you want to go a bit stronger do you?" The dealer beams at Mal who agrees. He hands the money over getting the powered substance in return, in all honesty Stiles has no idea what Mal just bought. They walk the short distance from the skanky apartment to a small clearing in the preserve luckily not on Hale property.

"What is it?" Stiles asks eyeing the bag cautiously.
"This my love is Crack and it is going to make you feel amazing."
"Dude I don’t want to do Crack, its super dangerous." Mal rolls his eyes at stiles' concerns and places a kiss on his cheek.
"It's no worse than the shit we have been snorting baby. Plus you know I will always take care of you. " 'ugh why does he have to be so charming' stiles thinks to himself before hesitantly nodding and agreeing to join in the 'fun'. Mal holds the small pipe to Stiles lips telling him when to breathe in, it burns when he does and makes him want to cough his lungs up but the effects are almost instant. He feels his heart begin to speed and a sudden burst of energy, for once he feels confident, he feels as though he could do anything that he wanted. Once Mal takes his hit they decide to go for a walk through the streets not caring that they both look off their heads.

"STILES!" he hears someone shout he turns and sees Scott and Isaac and Lydia coming towards him.
"Oh fuck." He says under his breath
"Dude were fucked." Mal says quickly as the pack members approach.
"Stiles what the hell where did you go last night?" Scott asks with an annoyed expression. Stiles is trying his absolute hardest not to keep moving or twitching he results in sniffing as if he has a cold when really his nose is just fucked up.
"Er Derek asked me to leave. " he says rubbing the back of his neck before Mal elbows him.
"Oh yeah guys this is Mal, Mal this is Scott, Isaac and Lydia." He points to each of his friends.
"Well Mal I'm very sorry but I'm going to have to steal your friend, you see he has been a bit of an asshole lately and we all need to have a chat." Lydia explains sweetly before grabbing stiles hand and leading him away leaving Mal stood alone.

Stiles willingly gets in the car with his friends as they drive back towards the preserve, it's been 5 minutes since he had his first hit and the effects are coming on strong he's hoping it just looks as though he hasn’t taken his adderal. When they arrive back at the Hale house stiles takes the time to down half of the contents of his flask before following his friends inside. He is slightly taken back when he sees the whole pack sat around staring at him.
"Guys I have better places to be yano, this is really not needed I'm fine. Look I know I have been withdrawn lately but I just can't be fucked with all the supernatural shit anymore okay." He realises how quickly it all came out and tries to hide his face.
"Stiles sit down." Derek orders. He groans at his itchy nose and sniffs several times to try and get rid of it.
"Dude are you sick of something? just like blow your nose it’s a super gross noise." Scott says innocently making Stiles want to burst out laughing.
"Yeah man I have a cold, I told you yesterday I wasn’t feeling to good." He tries to stop his hands from shaking by putting them in his pocket, he hopes the confusion of feeling a baggy in his pocket didn’t portray as much as he thinks it did.
"Stiles we are worried about you honey you don’t seem yourself." Lydia says soothingly leading stiles to chuckle 'of course I'm not okay I was possessed by a 1000 year old demon, who made me kill people including scotts first love and your boyfriend how the fuck am I supposed to be okay.' he thinks to himself but keeps his exterior as composed as possible.
"I don’t want any of your help okay. I don’t need it. I'm okay I promise." He adds a smile on the end.
"Guys can you give me and stiles a moment alone please." Derek asks his betas who all reluctantly get up and leave the room.

"Empty your pockets." He says as soon as they are alone.
"I said empty your pockets." He flashes his eyes red hoping to get stiles to obey.
"Look man, I really need to pee so if you could just give me a few minutes and I'll be all ears" he goes to walk away but Derek grabs his arm causing him to stumble back.
"You smell awful." Derek wrinkles his nose.
"Well you don’t exactly smell like a flower yourself." Stiles laughs
"Your high." Stiles looks around the room trying to avoid eye contact with his alpha.
"What are you using?"
"I just smoked pot Der-bear." Derek growls at the nickname.
"Its stronger, its masking your scent." Stiles doesn’t reply
"If you tell me what's going on I can help you stiles." stiles jerks his head up at Dereks voice. he sounds like he cares, stiles literally shakes the thoughts from his head which is a bad idea as he loses his balance and would have ended up on the floor had Derek not caught him. Stiles' eyes are filling with tears as he starts to realise what a mess up he is 'why would anyone want to help me?' he thinks 'I'm just a fucking mess.'
"Stiles empty your pockets." This time he does what he is told pulling out his pack of cigarettes, a lighter, an empty baggy with a tad of cocaine in it, weed, his flask and a few hits worth of crack. Dereks eyes widen as stiles puts it onto the table and before he knows it he is wrapping the young man in his arms and rubbing his scent onto him.
"Why" Derek asks into stiles' hair.
"After the Nogitsune nothing was the same and I couldn’t cope, I started drinking and then I met Mal who buys all this shit because he's an ungrateful rich bastard whose dad is a jerk. I know I have messed up but I don’t know what to do." He sobs uncontrollably into Dereks shirt whilst Derek rubs his back and makes shhing noises.
"How long stiles."
"6 months." He chokes out. Derek lifts stiles head so he can look at him properly.
"I promise I will help you stiles but you have to work with me okay. It isn't going to be easy but you need to get clean alright." Stiles nods and lets himself fall back into Dereks arms. Derek sits him on the sofa whilst he tells the rest of the pack to head home as he needs to be with stiles alone. When he comes back in stiles has calmed down a considerable amount, he looks defeated and ill. His skin is grey and taut, his eyes sunken in and his cheek bones sharper than ever.
"Stiles you need to end things with Mal okay, he isn't good for you and if we are going to get you better he can't be involved."
"I will see him later and break things off." Stiles tries to smile but Derek shakes his head.
"No stiles you arent going to see him again you can do it over text alright and then you are going to give me your phone. I will talk to your dad and tell him you will be staying here for a little while, at least until all the shit is out of your system."
"NO! please don’t tell my dad." He cries out grabbing Dereks hand.
"Hey look at me it's okay he's had his suspicions okay I spoke to him last night after you left." Stiles can't help but smile at how comforting the big bad wolf can actually be.


The next few weeks are hell, he is cold and then hot, constantly vomiting and shaking, he even broke a vase in one of his fits. But he never gives up and Derek is by his side every step of the way. The cravings have calmed down hell of a lot but they are still there some days more than others. Weeks turn to months and stiles finally has his life heading back in the right direction, he also has a Greek god for a boyfriend.
"I am so proud of you" Derek says pressing a kiss into stiles' hair causing a huge grin to spread across his face.
"I couldn’t have done this without you" There is a long pause as they both lay together silently before stiles opens his mouth and doesn’t think before he speaks.
"I love you Sourwolf." Derek freezes but sits up so he can see his boyfriends face, he presses a light kiss to his lips running his thumb over his soft cheek.
"I love you too Stiles and I will always be there for you no matter what's going on okay?"