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They've moved to a futon because Thor is so heavy that when he gingerly tried the bed it had creaked and groaned and made him leap up again like it had set his ass on fire. So now they sleep on the floor, on a dense, pretty-much-already-crushed mattress, and Jane keeps an icepick in handy reach. She loves cuddling with Thor, but after she had wet the bed because she couldn't get out from under his arm in time, Jane had taken steps. A good hard stab with the icepick doesn't really hurt him, but it's sharp enough to make him move. Most of the time he doesn't even wake up, just grunts and shifts enough for her to escape. Mostly that's to work, but sometimes she does just pull the covers off and study him. She can't help it, she's a scientist. And if a bunch of SHIELD biologists can paw her man, she's definitely allowed. She had freaked out a little the first time she had seen him naked, but he had been very sweet about it.

Today is a day for science. She can feel it in the air, and giggles because this is a sure sign that she's been around Tony Stark enough for his bad influence to take hold. Thor just smiles in his sleep and lies there like the seven hundred pounds of meat he is. Beautifully sculpted, hyperdense alien meat. He's on his back, sprawled out and taking up all the room like usual. At least him being made the way he is lets her just crawl onto him any way she wants without worrying about crushing his lungs or his bladder. She sits on one leg because it won't hurt him a bit, and studies the only gross morphological structure that doesn't look completely human. There are funny little ridges behind his ears that make him whimper when she touches them and apparently it's normal for an Asgardian male's nipples to drip when he's aroused enough. The stuff has some fascinating properties, but she's too shy to actually collect enough for analysis, much less explain what it is to a third party. She can't even picture describing Thor's cock in all its bizarre glory. Real embarrassment stops her imaginary self midway through the necessary gestures to describe its size.

As if summoned, it emerges from the ridiculously vaginal slit it lives in. She can't help but think of it that way, given the thing's tentacular properties. Asgardians get morning wood too, but Thor's is the size of most of her forearm and slithers a little. It's not fully prehensile, but articulate and serpentine in a very inhuman way, and makes its slow way from the centerline of Thor's body to a patch of heavy sun lying on his thigh, basking in the warmth like a cat. His testicles are internal, and there are little ridges at the base of the head that are a lot like the ones behind his ears and she strokes them now, shivering as they swell slightly. Thor wriggles happily on the mattress and opens his eyes at last. Jane beams down at him and squeezes the ridged section, making him whimper desperately and then groan as she pushes the head inside, wet enough just from looking at and handling him. Thor reaches for her, and she lets him draw her down, all that heavy, impossible strength cradling her when it would be so easy to crush her.

When she's settled her head on the one of his three hearts that's where a human would expect it to be, Thor's cock slithers as deep inside her as he can get it, and she shakes and squeals because it still feels the very best kind of weird. He chuckles, the sound purely happy without a hint of mockery. Jane smiles, and shifts to suck on one nipple, pulling the strange, sweet taste over her tongue and making Thor whimper.