It started when he was four, he would say something and it would happen. He didn't know how, or why, all he knew is that one moment he was crying that his mom didn't get him the toy trains he wanted and then they appeared in his hands. Then, he had simply shrugged it off and went to go play with them, now he knew better. Now Stiles was careful about saying what he wanted, now he knew better; his mother had taught him better.
She'd begun as soon as she realized what was happening and by the time Stiles was seven he was mostly in control of his abilities. Somehow the two of them kept his ability from his father, Stiles fondly thinking of it as a game they were playing; though as time went past he wondered why it was a secret, why his mom wouldn't tell him.
He learned soon enough when his mother died. He'd been ten, sitting in the uncomfortable visitors chair parked besides his sick mother lying in a hospital bed. His father gone, off at work, and Stiles was left alone with his mom's sick feverish hands reaching out to clutch at him.
"It's got to be a secret," She mumbled. "You can't tell anyone, not even your father, he won't realize how dangerous it is!"
"Okay mom," Stiles agree softly as she stopped reaching for him and fell back into the bed. "I won't tell."
And that was it, with one last raspy breath Claudia Stilinski's life ended. But then Stiles spoke in a wavering voice, "No, Mom, you aren't dead, you can't be!"
Her body jolted upright as if she were electrocuted and her lungs and heart suddenly began to move again. For one short moment, Stiles thought everything would be okay. Then his mom looked at him and all Stiles could see was rage.
"Stop looking at me!" She screamed her spit flying through the air as she stumbled out of the bed. "Stop, I know you want to kill me, but I won't let you!"
She raised a hand and slapped Stiles across the face causing him to whimper in pain, "What are you doing?"
"I'm gonna kill you first," She grins her eyes so different than before her death.
Stiles sobbed quietly, "You aren't her! You aren't my mom!"
"Of course not," Claudia said raising her hand to hit Stiles again, "I'd never birth a monster!"
Stiles screamed as her finger nails dragged across his flesh and gasped out a command, "Get away from me!"
Slowly, his mother backed up until she was sitting on her bed again, and still hollering loud profanities at Stiles as he huddled in the corner.
"Stop," he sobbed and instantly the room fell silent. After a moment he finally looked up, tears still running down his cheeks, and saw his mother. She was sprawled out across her hospital bed, dead once again as Stiles' command stopped her heart.
As the doctors finally came rushing into the room Stiles stared, wide eyed. He finally understood why he couldn't tell his father, he'd want Stiles to brig back Claudia. Now Stiles knew better, he knew whatever came back from the grave it wouldn't be the same person as before.
Stiles didn't use his powers after that, he kept a tight reign over them until at the age sixteen his best friend turned into a werewolf and tried to attack him. Even then, Stiles only used his abilities to keep himself from serious injury and when he got home he had a minor panic attack.
It takes a week, but eventually Stiles came to the decision that he will use his abilities, but only in ways he knows wouldn't be abusing them. Mostly importantly, he swears he wouldn't bring anyone back to life even though there are dead bodies showing up more and more often.
Stiles is almost surprised when the use of his powers doesn't bring an end to life as he knows it. Then he remembers the times his mother had taught him control and he's reminded that it's probably only due to her that he hasn't hurt anyone the way he hurt her by returning her to life.
So Stiles uses his powers sparsely and for the most part acts as a regular human and allows the werewolves to do the real fighting. When they finally go up against Peter the only thing Stiles does is say that he and his friends will get through it alright. After all, Stiles reasons with himself, preventing a death isn't the same as reversing one.
His fear that they aren't really all that different only lasts a week before he decides that if something were going to happen it would've already. So Stiles counts it as a win and smiles as he realizes the threat is gone and he can stop using his abilities.
Of course then Derek builds a pack, a kanima peruses the town, Peter comes back to life, and a pack of Alphas comes to hunt them down. Still, Stiles does his best to avoid using his powers only using them twice as he mutters about not letting Derek an him drown an how, "The pack has to stay alive."
It's after Boyd and Erica have gone missing and he can only hope that it'll still help them out. He's kind of fond of Erica and has a sinking feeling that she needs protection at the moment.
When Derek and Scott finally locate the betas in the bank, it's a full moon. Discreetly, Stiles follows them there trying to ignore a feeling deep in his gut as it warns him that something is wrong. Stiles has just entered the bank when he gets a call from Peter.
"What?" Stiles snaps as he hears the crashing of the two wolves breaking into the back where Erica and Boyd are being held.
"Tell Scott and Derek to get out of there," Peter urges as he explains how the wolves have been deprived of the moon light.
"Got it," Stiles answers with a sharp nod before hanging up. When he finally reaches the vault he stumbles upon Scott and Derek fighting a stranger as well as Erica and Boyd.
"Don't notice me," Stile thinks and he imbues the thought with his power. Then he steps through the mountain ash circle just to ensure his power will reach the betas as he says, "Be normal."
They instantly relax though their wolf features don't recede.
"What was that?" The stranger asks as she rubs her head. "What stopped us?"
"I don't know," Boyd mutters as his amber eyes survey the room and pass right over where Stiles is standing.
Still, he takes that as his cue to leave, he doesn't know when his magic will wear off (or if it even will), but he decides it's better to be safe than sorry. He heads home and then straight for his bathroom where he throws up his dinner.
It's different, he thinks, controlling someone and making them do what he wants. Usually he just gets something with out forcing people, but this time it didn't work that way.
It doesn't matter to Stiles that all he did was stop them from killing Scott and Derek, he still feels horrible about the whole thing ands wonders if using his powers again is a bad idea.
"Dude," Scott says the next morning as he walks up to Stiles in the hallway. "Are you okay? You look like shit!"
"Fine," Stiles grunts as does his best not to think about last night. "Whats up?"
As Scott fills him in on what happened last night Stiles mostly gets lost in his own thoughts about how he should handle his powers. He could always ignore them the way he had until being dragged into the world of supernatural. Then again, if he did that he would feel guilty every time something happened to one of his friends.
"Anyway," Scott is saying as Stiles tunes back in. "The new wolf is Cora, Derek's sister."
"Really," Stiles asks, "I thought she was dead?"
Scott shrugs, "Apparently not."
And that's the end of their conversation. Time passes and Stiles finds the day goes by fairly quickly and until he leaves with out incident. Then he walks into the parking lot and finds Peter blocking his way.
"Excuse me," Stiles tries as he attempting to reach his jeep in vain. "Can you move?"
"What," Peter purrs, "No hello?"
"For a mass murder like you, no." Stiles says with a fake smile. "Now, can you get out of my way?"
"No," Peter replies with a smirk, "I don't think I will, I'd rather stay and talk."
"Fine, talk!" Stiles commands figuring it's the quickest way to make Peter leave.
"I heard the strangest thing this morning, apparently you never called Scott and told him about how the betas would be wild Dom the lack of moon light. Then Derek told something even more odd, the betas just randomly stopped snarling and regained control for no reason. I personally found that very odd so I went to the bank myself. I never imagined to smell that you had been there. Tell me, how'd you stop them?"
"I didn't," Stiles lies as he shoves Peter in hopes of getting to his car.
Peter stops him with one hand, "Now, now, don't think I can't tell you were lying just then."
"Get out of my way," Stiles commands and fear loosens his grip on his powers just enough to force Peter to step aside.
All the while the werewolf watches Stiles with curious eyes. Panic bubbles up inside of his chest as realizes he has basically just confessed to Peter about what he can do. This time he purposely imbues his words with power, "Don't tell anyone about this, and don't try to use me to your advantage!"
Stiles drives home in a frenzy as nausea builds deep with in him. He forced Peter to do something, and sure it had only been to protect his secret from a murderer, but he was still imposing his will upon others and who knows how that could them up. For all he knows it could destroy the fragile balance inside their heads the same way resurrection had destroyed his mother's. He needs to learn more about his ability and how it affects the universe.
That night Stiles pulls out his laptop and shoots a quick email to his Uncle Czeslaw. He hasn't actually been in contact with the man since he was five, but he can recall his mother gently whispering in his ear about how Czeslaw would help him if he ever needed it.
Later, when he's finally asleep, Stiles dreams about chess only his pawns are people and he laughs as he moves them as a sacrifice.
The first thing he does is check his email and sigh in relief as he sees his uncle has responded. Hurriedly, Stiles prints out what Uncle Czeslaw has sent him and shoves a bag filled with clothing.
Stiles gets into the jeep and drives along the route to school. Only, today he doesn't stop there, instead opting to continue driving all the way to the nearest air port, the plane ticket Uncle Czeslaw paid for crumpled in his hand.
As Stiles boards the plane to Poland he writes a letter in his head knowing it'll do as he wants and appear on the kitchen table. It reads:
You've probably noticed that I'm not home and I wasn't at school today. That's because I had to leave, I can't tell you why or where I went, but I want you to know that I love you and I'm safe. I'll try to come home soon.
You're like a brother to me and I'm sorry I'm leaving you now when I know things are tough. You can get through this, you have plenty of people in your side to help you.
I love you all,