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The Three Stages of Stiles's Intoxication

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Stiles wasn't exactly the most coherent drunk or coherent anything really but when he had climbed into bed with Derek at 2 in the morning demanding sex, who was Derek to say no.

Derek enjoyed it while it lasted but as soon as Stiles passed out, face pressed against Derek's chest, he really started to kick himself. How could he of taken advantage of poor, innocent, doe-eyed Stiles. That's how Derek ended up carrying Stiles to his own bed in the apartment they shared together at 4 in the morning.

The next morning, afternoon really, Stiles walked into the kitchen with a grimace and made his way to the coffee machine. Derek was waiting for the awkward ice breaker or maybe even a sly smirk from Stiles but it never came. The only thing Derek got from him was a groaned, "I can't remember anything past the third shot," and a grunt of, "Wake me up at two for my class, will you?"

But, really, how could Derek be shocked. Stiles was belligerent the night before, slurring every dirty word that fell out of his mouth and the slow movements of his body against Derek's where Derek would have expected faster, more rapid movements out of the over spastic man.

As Derek worked on his thesis that day, he pondered over the situation. Had Stiles maybe remembered and was trying not to make things weird? No, Derek could tell when Stiles lied. So it must of been that Derek really did take advantage of Stiles.

The thought shocked Derek and made him worry that he might've hurt Stiles, physically or mentally. What if Stiles only vaguely remembers having sex but doesn't remember who with?

Eventually Derek settled on the fact that, no matter what, he did himself a favor. He saved a lot of awkwardness between the two of them and made his life a lot less complicated, at least after he stops feeling guilty, that is.

He wakes Stiles up at two as requested earlier and watches Stiles's every move until he's sitting up all the way, rubbing his eyes with his hands.

"I don't know what I did last night but my ass feels like I got gang banged." Stiles professed, walking to his bathroom without looking to see Derek's expression. There is no way that Stiles remembered anything from last night.

The rest of the week went on as it normally did between the two men except the fact that Derek was on edge the entire time. He could tell Stiles realized it but probably didn't ask in fear that he would cause a fight like he usually did.

Every time Stiles and Derek happened to end up in the same room together, Derek would come up with the most polite excuse that he could muster and get the hell out of dodge.

Friday eventually came around and Derek was figuring out if he should sleep with his door locked or not when Stiles came into the living room dressed in his clubbing clothes. "Hey, I'm going out. See you tomorrow. Don't wait up."

In that moment, a stroke of genius hit Derek. Why doesn't he just go with Stiles to the club and do damage control on how much he drinks so that he doesn't get so drunk that he wants to have sex with Derek?

That's how Derek ended up at a loud and humid club at midnight, watching Stiles dance with Lydia from his seat at the bar. Stiles was only on his second drink and had a cup of water in between those two by request of Derek. Stiles was not happy about that at all.

Derek was currently nursing a scotch which is doing absolutely nothing for him but make his throat burn. He realizes belatedly that someone has sat in the seat next to him, and just as he's about to snap at them for sitting beside him, he realizes it's Scott.

"So," Scott begins. "Why have you been acting weird all week? Not that you don't usually act weird, but you are acting weirder than usual. Also, why have you been watching Stiles all night?"

Derek gulps down the rest of his scotch, setting the empty tumbler on the bar and signaling the bartender to pour him another. He takes his sweet time, smelling the dark liquid before taking a long sip and setting it down on the bar once again. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Scott rolls his eyes and looks toward Stiles. "So it doesn't piss you off that Stiles is currently grinding up against a total stranger."

That caught Derek's attention. He let out a short growl, standing up before he even gets a chance to look at where Stiles is dancing but when he does he sees that's he is still dancing with Lydia. He sits back down, dropping his bravado, and looks Scott in the eye. "Okay, you caught me, alright?"

"No, not alright." Scott crosses his arms over his chest and squares his shoulders. "I want to know why Stiles smelt like sex, more specifically your come, last weekend."

Derek looked at Scott for a minute before deciding that deflecting the original question is worth a shot. "How do you even know what my come smells like?"

"Oh please, Derek. I've been inside your room. You jack off once a day, you don't think that smell lingers? Anyway, back to the more important question, what is going on with you and Stiles?" Scott had that determined look in his eyes, the one he gets whenever he comes up with most of his plans for the latest bad guy in Beacon Hills.

"Yes, okay, we had sex. But he was extremely drunk and he kind of crawled into bed with me and one thing led to another, you know how it goes."

Scott sighs and drops his hands to rest on the bar in front of him. "And now you feel guilty for taking advantage of Stiles in his drunken state."

Derek gives a curt nod and looks back to Stiles who is looking at Derek and Scott, as well. Stiles waves at them and then whispers something to Lydia who nods and then they continue dancing.

"Derek, I'm going to tell you something but you can not, I repeat, can not, tell Stiles that I told you, okay?"

Derek nods again, listening intently to what Scott has to say. "When Stiles drinks he has a very odd experience. We call it The Three Stages of Stiles's Intoxication. First stage is when he gets so plastered that he dances with every guy and girl in the club to try to take them home. Of course, no one does because he is so hammered that he basically makes an ass of himself.

"Stage two is called the horny stage. He usually goes home and jacks off but on the extremely rare occasion that he stumbles upon someone who he likes that will deal with him being completely smashed, he will have sex with them. Now, most of the pack had experienced being hit on by drunk Stiles and has learned to get out of it easily, but you don't come dancing with us very often, now do you?"

Derek shakes his head at Scott who takes a deep breath before moving on. "And last, but not least, comes the Amnesia Stage. This is a harsher word for it than it needs, to be honest. Basically what happens is he will wake up the next morning and not remember anything until half way into the week. That's usually when he comes and apologizes to anyone he may have hit on or anyone he might have accidentally or purposefully hurt that night. It's quite sweet actually."

The information Scott just gave Derek finally sinks in and Derek tried to compute what exactly this all means. There is no way Stiles remembered what happened. If he did, he never explicitly showed it around Derek. Or maybe he did but Derek was too wrapped up in how to get away from him that he notice. That seems like the more logical explanation.

"You need to talk to him. Tell him how you feel, maybe. Explain why you were so weird this week in as few grunts as possible." Derek glares at him and Scott slaps him on the back before standing up and walking over to where Kira is dancing and joining her.

As always, Scott is right. He shouldn't keep all these feelings bottled up inside. He needs to talk to Stiles before he gets so plastered that he won't even remember the conversation.

Derek picks up his whiskey and tips it back, forgetting for a moment that alcohol does nothing for him, and then makes his way toward Stiles and Lydia.

When he approaches them, he leans in close to Lydia and shouts over the music, "Can I cut in?" Lydia gives him a nod and a knowing smile before running off to the bar to get herself another drink.

Both Derek and Stiles stand there awkwardly for a moment without making a move for the other one until, eventually, Derek places a hand on Stiles's hip and pulls the younger man flat up against him. Stiles reacts immediately, swaying his hips in time with the techno-club music that is blasting through the speakers.

"Took you long enough." Stiles said, knowing Derek would hear him over the music. Derek chose to ignore him in favor of sliding their groins against each other and making Stiles release a breathy moan.

Stiles leans his face up towards Derek's, looking him in the eye and then flicking his attention down to Derek's already parted lips. It doesn't take long for one of them (Derek couldn't tell you who made the first move) to surge forward and begin their fight for dominance.

Eventually, Stiles let Derek be in charge, letting him lick into Stiles's mouth with vigor, so unlike the way Derek had kissed Stiles the other night. The other night, everything went at a slow pace. Now, Derek just wanted to have all of Stiles in that moment.

Derek broke the kiss and grabbed Stiles hand, leading him to the bathroom that was over by the bar area. Derek couldn't care less how public their sex life was about to be. All he cared about was having Stiles as soon as he possibly could.

Luckily, the bathrooms were a one room only kind of deal so they were able to be completely alone, or, alone as they could be with their friends being werewolves and all. As soon as the door was shut, Stiles sank to his knees and palmed his hand on Derek's half-hard dick while looking up longingly at Derek.

"You're so beautiful, Stiles." Derek says, running a hand through Stiles's already messy hair. Stiles began unbuttoning Derek's pants and proceeded to pull his pants and underwear down in one swift motion.

Stiles stared at Derek's dick for a long second before breathing out, "Oh my God." Stiles, then, leaned forward and licked a long strip up the length. Derek hissed out a breath at the sensation of Stiles's warm tongue on his already hot flesh.

"God, you taste so good." Stiles groaned before going in for another lick. Derek was about to grab his cock and place it against Stiles's mouth so he would just suck it already when Stiles dos exactly that and completely swallowed it down his throat.

Derek couldn't hold in the loud moans that escaped his mouth when Stiles bobbed up and down on his dick, not once touching his teeth to it, which was impressive considering the length and girth of Derek's member.

After a few minutes, Derek took a hold of his dick so Stiles would stop and said, "I want to fuck you. Will you let me?"

"Fuck yes." Stiles replied easily.

Derek immediately went to unbutton Stiles jeans, slowly kissing him in the process. He pushed them down to his thighs, noticing that Stiles hadn't bothered to wear any underwear. "So sexy."

Stiles placed his hands against the wall and bent over slightly so that Derek could see his clean shaven ass perfectly. "Someone was a little hopeful."

Letting out a soft laugh, Stiles looked over his shoulder at Derek. "I was right though, wasn't I?"

"That you were." Derek places a finger at Stiles entrance, watching as it goes in with only a little resistance. Stiles reaches a hand into his pants pocket and deposits two packets of lube and a condom, although he puts the condos back into the pocket. "I don't think we'll be needing that."

Derek smiles to himself as he takes the packets of lube from Stiles. "Probably not, seeing as we didn't use one the other night either."

Stiles lets out an embarrassed laugh. "I'm kind of a slut, aren't I?"

Derek slicks up two of his fingers and tosses one of the packets that he used into the trash nearby. "No. I think you're perfect." Derek promptly sticks the two fingers into Stiles's hole, making Stiles gasp out a moan in return.

While Derek scissors his fingers back and forth in the younger man's ass, he preps his cock, slicking it thoroughly with lube from the remaining packet. He slips in a third finger and decides that Stiles is ready enough.

He places his cock in Stiles's ass and let's it sit there for a moment. "Are you sure about this? I don't want there to be any regrets considering how sober you are."

"Oh my god, shut the fuck up and just put your dick in me already." Stiles begs. With that Derek slides into Stiles, easily, all the way to the base. Both the men let out lewd groans and Derek doesn't move, too afraid that he'll come too soon.

"Derek," Stiles says through his teeth. "If you don't move right fucking now, I swear to god that I will leave you all alone in this bathroom, walk to the nearest sex shop, buy a dildo, and fuck myself on it, and not feel and remorse at all."

All Derek can do is chuckle. "Whatever you say, Stiles." And punctuates it with a sharp snap of his hips. He continues at a earth-shattering pace, making Stiles completely speechless.

Derek realizes a moment later that someone is banging at the door, most likely pissed off that someone has been in the bathroom for so long. Derek swears under his breath from both annoyance and arousal, and begins stroking Stiles's dick.

"Ignore them." Stiles breathes out.

"I'm trying." Derek groans.

It only takes Derek another minute to get to the point where he feels like he's going to come any second. In Derek's hand, Stiles tightens up and Derek can tell he isn't going to last much longer either. He begins to stroke Stiles faster, hoping he will come soon.

He isn't meaning to rush this but, subconsciously, he just really wants to get out of the disgusting bathroom they are in and just get back to their apartment.

Almost completely in sync, Derek and Stiles come with an elated groan. They stand there for what seems like hours when in reality it was probably only a few minutes. The banging on the door is still happening and Derek quickly pulls his dick out of Stiles and goes over to get a paper towel for him.

As Derek is pulling up his pants, he realizes that Stiles's ass is leaking with come. "We might want to get home soon unless you want to go and dance with all that come sitting in your underwear." Stiles agrees whole heartedly.

When everything is put away and all signs of sex have been properly dealt with, Derek opens up the door to the bathroom to find an angry man standing behind it with a hand up, ready to bang on the door again. Derek grabs Stiles hand and walks past the man with a quick, "It's all yours."

When they returned to their friends who were conveniently all gathered together at a table, they explained they were going home early and that they were going to do exactly what they think they were going to do. The catcalls and inappropriate comments that they receive are totally worth it.