Actions

Work Header

Two Monks Invent Fandom

Chapter Text

FANFICTION

MONK #1: hi

MONK #2: 'sup?

MONK #1: you've seen tv right
and movies
read books
that kind of thing?

MONK #2: oh yeah

MONK #1: well
what comes next
i mean
what do you do then

MONK #2: secret stories
write them for free
only show them to the internet

MONK #1: k
any general focus?

MONK #2: mostly kissing
and oh
almost forgot
make sure you feel irrationally strongly

MONK #1: about?

MONK #2: everything
for fun


SLASH

MONK #1: when someone writes a story
what's a thing it can be about

MONK #2: DUDES IN LOVE
all the dudes
in love

MONK #1: huh
even the--

MONK #2: ALL OF THEM


A/B/O

MONK #1: so when you're writing about dudes in love
what's the story like

MONK #2: well
you want everyone to be wolf-like

MONK #1: wolf-like?

MONK #2: yeah
with wolf roles
and wolf relationships
and wolf sexytimes

MONK #1: okay
anything else?

MONK #2: weird penises
weirder the better

MONK #1: k

MONK #2: oh and do you have a lunar calendar?

  

MPREG

MONK #1: hey the people with uteruses
who are they again?

MONK #2: women?

MONK #1: yeah
they're the baby-having ones
right?

MONK #2: ehh

 

SLASH, TAKE TWO

MONK #1: so what's the thing that women do, then?

MONK #2: ah
right
forgot to mention
be in love with other ladies
def make a note of that

 

SEX POLLEN

MONK #1: what was that one way
to get people to hook up
the logical one

MONK #2: oh that
plants
very sexy plants

 

ALIENS MAKE THEM DO IT

MONK #1: any others I should know about?

MONK #2: well it's kind of the same thing
but with outer space

MONK #1: go on

MONK #2: and people who aren't from around here
with kinda sketchy motivation

 

COFFEE SHOP A/U

MONK #1: say you want to mix things up

MONK #2: okay

MONK #1: put everyone in some kind of alternate universe
more creative
where the stakes are higher

MONK #2: ah I get where you're going with this
you want to inject some caffeine into the situation

MONK #1: yeah
so to speak

MONK #2: coffee shops
are definitely what you need

MONK #1: like...?

MONK #2: everyone works in a coffee shop
or goes to a coffee shop
vampires
superheroes
vulcans
whatevs
now in a coffee shop
it'll blow people's minds

  

WINGFIC

MONK #1: what are those things with wings again?

MONK #2: planes?

MONK #1: no the
the feather type wings
birds?

MONK #2: oh
no
people

MONK #1: are you sure it's not birds?

MONK #2: mosdef
the big feathery sexy kind?
definitely people
trust me
I think I know something about wings

 

RPF

MONK #1: hey so people in bands

MONK #2: yeah

MONK #1: what do they do again
i feel like it was something with music or ... ?

MONK #2: kissing actually
well mostly kissing
sometimes nudity
not sure about the music thing sry

 

MARY SUE AND GARY STU


MONK #1: people's eyes
what color are they
generally speaking

MONK #2: violet
mostly
MAYBE sparkling green
definitely hiding the pain of a tragic past

MONK #1: okay
and they're for seeing?

MONK #2: yeah i guess they do that too
but primarily it's a making-people-fall-in-love-with-you thing

MONK #1: gotcha

 

GENDER SWAP

MONK #2: oh hey btw
you can ignore the smaller canon details

MONK #1: oh cool...
like what? 

MONK #2: idk
genitals and pronouns
stuff like that

 

HARRY POTTER FANDOM

MONK #1: that kid with the facial deformity
and the special stick
out of all the people he's ever met
which ones go together?
sexually speaking

MONK #2: oh all of them
any combo
don't forget the house elves
or the giant squid