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Conquerors Anonymous

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*two figures propped against a wall in a deserted bar*

Nikola: *staring morosely down at an empty wine bottle* It just doesn't have the kick it used to. *turns the bottle a little* Of course, inferior quality will do that.

Methos: *amused* I never understood the fascination with wine. Beer. When in doubt, always go for beer. And never, ever trust the water.

Nikola: *grins, with teeth* Vampire. I never drink ... blood. *shrugs* You can have one red, viscous liquid you can tell me not to drink. Please choose wisely.

Methos: *laughs* Point taken. And prohibition must have been a nightmare for you.

Nikola: *sourly* You have no idea. And for some reason, no-one ever accepts "It's medicinal, I need it because I'm a vampire" as an excuse. *sighs tiredly* Is it any wonder I want to take over the world? Just a little bit?

Methos: *lightly* No wonder at all. Though I'd pass, if I were you. It gets old surprisingly fast. And it doesn't actually make people listen to you anymore than they usually would.

Nikola: *squints suspiciously at him* And how would you know?

Methos: *shrugs* Been around. Saw the vampires fall the first time, actually. And wasn't that fun for all concerned.

Nikola: *straightens, shifts towards him* You saw ...?

Methos: Among other things. *looks at him, raises the remains of a beer wryly* Trust me. They all fall out the same. And for much the same reasons, in the end. Pride and stupidity and greed. Not even vampires are immune.

Nikola: ... Now, you sound like James. *narrows eyes* Very like him, in fact.

Methos: *grins carelessly* So you said. I think I'd have liked to meet him, your James. *a small smile* Though perhaps not his lovers.

Nikola: *sits back, lets the suspicion drop for a second* Nah. Well, Johnny's an acquired taste, I'll agree with you there. But Helen is ... *gestures vaguely*

Methos: *smiling faintly and distantly* Ah, but that's the problem, isn't it? *shakes head* You should never fall in love with the hero of the story. It never ... never ends well.

Nikola: ... Do you know the other advantage of wine? *levers himself up, scouts for more bottles* It's easier to get drunk with. Even for vampires.

Methos: *watches him wander away, still faintly smiling, and tiredly*