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Let the Freedom Begin

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Gerard fiddled with the hem of his skirt, brushed his fingertips down the inches of smooth bare thigh until he hit the top edge of his shiny black boots. They came right up over his knee and they weren't the most comfortable things he'd ever worn, but the look on Bob's face when Gerard had opened the door earlier tonight made any discomfort totally worth it.

He'd seen them online and just knew he had to have them. Of course, then he'd had to get a new outfit because the one dress he already owned just didn't go. The skirt was too long and the style was way too demure for thigh-high boots.

The short silvery-grey dress he'd found on the same site as the boots worked perfectly. The neckline dipped low, but not so low as to make the lack of breasts a major issue. It even had a little built-in bra, so he didn't have to figure out how to make fake boobs in a backless dress. The fabric draped over the front in such a way that he didn't bother stuffing it. It created such an effective illusion that the only way to know there was nothing there would be to touch him, and nobody but Bob would be doing that.

Like he was doing right now. His hand was big and warm on Gerard's back as they walked toward the club, and all night he'd been such a perfect gentleman--opening doors, pulling out his chair at dinner, holding his hand when they crossed the street-- that Gerard just had to ask something that he'd wondered about but never bothered to bring up before. The night made him feel free to finally just ask.

"Bob. Have you dated many women?" And by 'dated' he totally meant 'fucked', and Bob must have picked up on that because he gave him a surprised look. Gerard chewed on the corner of his mouth a little before remembering he didn't want to fuck up his lipstick. "I mean, well. We've never really talked about it, and I was just...wondering."

"A few," Bob said with a shrug that could mean any number of things. "It took me a while to figure myself out. You?"

"No, not really. I figured myself out pretty early on." Gerard glanced over at Bob through the curtain of his hair and laughed a little. "Well, more or less. Obviously, I'm still learning."

"Yeah." Bob smiled back and slid his hand down to squeeze Gerard's hip. Gerard had to fight off a shiver even though the spring evening was quite warm. "I can't complain if this is the result."

Gerard actually considered his next question before he asked it, instead of blurting it out and letting his thought processes catch up with him later. Bob's answer didn't matter to him, really, not enough to make him stop. But he was curious. "Do you still think about it? Like, is this your way of having it both ways?"

Bob's footsteps slowed and he looked cornered for a moment, but then he stopped completely and turned to face Gerard. His mouth was pulled tight and his eyebrows did that crumpled thing they did when he was thinking really hard, and Gerard sort of wanted to kiss him and withdraw the question but it was out there now. He waited patiently and finally Bob slowly said, " was your idea. I never would have even thought of it."

"Yeah, okay, that's cool. I just wondered." Gerard didn't mention the fact Bob didn't actually really directly answer the main question. He slipped his arm around Bob's and started them walking again.

"No," Bob said after a few yards and Gerard absolutely didn't breathe a sigh of relief, because it didn't matter. He glanced at Bob with a questioning head-tilt because there had to be more and Bob would get there in his own time. When he spoke his voice dropped to a confidential tone that wouldn't be overheard by passersby, if there'd been any. It was hot as fuck when he did that. "It's not having it both ways. I never, ever forget you're a guy underneath the dress and the makeup. It wasn't my kink at all."

"Wasn't?" More relieved than he would have thought possible, Gerard grinned and squeezed Bob's arm, pulling him close in a total girlfriend move that he'd always wanted to be able to do but couldn't pull off as a guy without looking extra dorky. "Does that mean it is now?"

"Maybe," Bob said and then he laughed low in the way that made Gerard go tingly all over, although part of it may have been the thrill of giving Bob new kinks. "Maybe it is."



The only thing Bob didn't like about drag nights--of which there hadn't been very many since that Halloween party that started it all--was that if Gerard was actually trying to pass, he couldn't talk much. He had to speak very quietly when nobody could overhear, often directly into Bob's ear. The combination of Gerard's low voice and warm breath left Bob in a constant state of half arousal. The fact that Gerard made a really hot chick took care of the other half.

The club was so busy and loud that Gerard couldn't take the chance that yelling would tip someone off, so they'd discussed it and decided that Bob would try to only ask him yes or no questions.

Trying to stall the inevitable, Bob asked loudly over Beyonce exhorting all the single ladies to put a ring on it. "Do you want a drink first?"

Gerard tilted his chin down and grinned, then shook his head. He was obviously on to Bob's game. Bob sighed and let him lead the way onto the crowded dance floor.

Bob was lucky that Gerard didn't really expect much from him. He just had to shuffle his feet a little while Gerard pressed up against him and did all the work. And work he did.

Gerard hooked his arms around Bob's neck--the heels on his boots made them the same height--and brushed his lips lightly across Bob's before starting to move. Bob groaned a little when Gerard bent his knees and circled his hips in time to the music, brushing his body lightly against Bob's in the most shameless tease possible. The wicked little smirk on his face showed that Gerard knew exactly what he was doing to Bob.

The song changed to something that Bob had never heard before but apparently Gerard liked it because he tossed his head back, sending his hair flying, and grinned. He slid one foot between Bob's and pressed his pelvis against Bob's hip and started grinding. Instinctively, Bob's grip on Gerard's waist tightened and he thrust forward hard. Gerard buried his face in Bob's neck and his whole body shook with suppressed laughter. Bob could feel Gerard's open mouth moving against his throat and he wondered if he could get away with dragging Gerard off the floor and to the restrooms for a quick fuck.

As if he could read Bob's mind--or more likely, his body-- Gerard raised his head and gave Bob a warning look. Bob smirked back at him and slid his hands down to Gerard's ass and give him a playful squeeze. Gerard shoved impossibly closer until he was pretty much riding Bob's thigh and Bob groaned again, knowing that nobody would hear him anyway and eased Gerard back a bit. They were dangerously close to having sex right on the dance floor.

With a wicked grin, Gerard moved away so that he could spin around and back up to Bob, rubbing his ass right up against Bob's erection and tilting his head back onto Bob's shoulder. Bob bit his neck just above the velvet choker he wore to cover his Adam's apple and said, "Behave" right into his ear.

Gerard turned back around and gave him a disappointed pout, but he kept his dancing PG rated through the rest of the song and the next, long enough for Bob to stare off into space and think about puppies and kittens or whatever until he calmed down enough not to embarrass himself. He was still turned on, but not as visibly so. He hoped.

This whole experience was weird for Bob. He'd been telling the truth earlier. He didn't really get turned on by women anymore, not after he figured out it was men who really did it for him. And yet Gerard in drag totally did it for him too. But it wasn't just the kink of the dress and heels and lipstick. On the rare occasions he did it, Gerard really committed to it. He didn't just throw on some clothes like a costume and ask Bob to fuck him. He took the opportunity to indulge in behaviors in public that he couldn't as a man, and do things that he didn't ever seem to want to do as himself. Like the dancing, for a start. He also took great delight in twining his arm with Bob's and cupping his hand around Bob's when he lit Gerard's cigarettes for him. When they were just two guys out and about, they barely touched each other. It wasn't anything they ever talked about and they never discussed how different Gerard was when he dressed up. Bob never mentioned the way Gerard leaned across the table to offer him a bite of his dessert, when ordinarily Bob would have to steal a taste when Gerard was distracted. Then Gerard would act annoyed but move the plate closer to Bob so he could do it again.

Gerard always talked with his hands, but when he dressed up, his movements became more calculated, flirty and delicate. He played with his hair and fiddled with the dangly clip-on earrings he'd gotten to go with the new dress. Bob had nearly laughed at him when Gerard had asked the sales clerk if he could have a gift box, then Gerard had lectured Bob on societal expectations and how stifling they were all the way home. Which was pretty much Gerard's point about drag anyway. Bob didn't need a lecture to understand that. He knew Gerard.

When the music changed again to something more techno, Bob nodded toward the bar and Gerard smiled and nodded back. Bob held Gerard's hand as he guided them both through the crowd and found an open spot at the bar. "You want a coke or water?" Bob asked and Gerard just gave him a look, like he was seriously questioning Bob's intelligence. "I mean, do you want a coke?" Gerard nodded, and Bob waved the bartender over and ordered Gerard's soda and a water for himself.

"Having fun?" Bob asked, after he'd paid the bartender. Gerard sipped his drink and looked around at all the other people, dancing and laughing and flirting. He nodded and smiled brightly.

Bob glanced over Gerard's shoulder and caught some guy blatantly staring at Gerard's ass, so Bob casually reached around and splayed his hand across the small of Gerard's back in an act of possessiveness that nearly made him roll his eyes at himself. He looked back at Gerard and said, "Do you have any idea what you're doing to me?"

Gerard adopted an innocent expression and shrugged his shoulders, pursing his lips exaggeratedly to sip from the small red straw in his glass.

Bob rubbed his free hand over his face and sighed. When he looked again, Gerard was silently laughing at him.



"Do you have any idea what you're doing to me?" Bob asked, his hand flexing gently against Gerard's back.

Gerard took a sip of his coke and laughed when Bob just covered his face and sighed. Gerard did think about it, though, while Bob drained his water and then excused himself to go to the restroom. "Are you going to be all right by yourself?"

Gerard nodded and leaned so close his lips brushed Bob's ear when he said, "You worry too much."

"That is a matter of opinion."

"Yes, mine," said Gerard, and since he was feeling sassy, he flicked his tongue against Bob's neck as he drew away.

Bob pointed at him and said "Behave." But he smiled as he walked off toward the restrooms. Gerard watched him go, enjoying the confident way he maneuvered through the crowd, then settled back against the bar for some people watching.

It had taken him a long time after he got clean to be comfortable around people drinking and it was still something he avoided on bad days, but on good days like this, it didn't bother him. He just made the decision not to drink, like he did every day of his life.

He was pulled from his musing by the brush of fingers along his bare arm. Thinking Bob must have come back, he turned with a smile. He pulled back when he saw it was not Bob touching him, but some dark haired stranger with an eager smile.

"Hi, I'm Phil. I wondered if I could buy you a drink?"

Gerard held up his half-full glass and shook his head. He smiled apologetically and turned to look for Bob, but the guy--Phil, apparently--put his hand on Gerard's arm and said, "What about a dance then?"

Gerard shook his head and tried to pull his arm away, but Phil tightened his grip and said, "Come on, just one dance. At least tell me your name."

"No," Gerard said as softly and femininely as he could as still be heard. He was starting to get really pissed off, but he couldn't do anything that might start a fight that would reveal him to be a man in a dress, so he had to stay quiet and try to quietly kill the guy with his brain. "I'm not interested."

Phil got a stubborn look on his face and started to say something else, but Bob walked up and said, "Hey, baby, sorry I was gone so long. This guy bothering you?"

Gerard sighed and nodded, lifting his arm.

"Turn her loose now," Bob said, and Gerard was impressed he didn't stumble over the pronoun at all. The thread of steel in his voice and the way his entire body tensed as if ready to spring into action must have finally convinced Phil that his attentions were not only unwanted but just might result in an ass-kicking as well.

"Next time, take no for an answer," Bob said, moving to put himself just a little bit more in front of Gerard. "Now fuck off."

Once they were alone again, Gerard said just loud enough for Bob to hear him, "What the fuck is that bullshit? A woman can't go dancing or have a drink by herself without some asshole thinking 'no' means to keep pushing until it becomes 'yes'? That is fucked up."

"Yeah, it fucking sucks." If Bob noticed how shaky Gerard had sounded, he didn't mention it and Gerard made an effort to release his anger and not let some dick ruin his evening. "Do you wanna go now?"

Gerard shook his head and dragged Bob back onto the dance floor just as For Your Entertainment came on. Gerard clapped his hands once in glee and determined that this time he'd get Bob to actually dance with him instead of just swaying a little. Bob rolled his eyes at him, but he grinned so Gerard counted it as a win.

Bob had a drummer's sense of rhythm, so he could actually move to the beat when Gerard could get him to stop being self-conscious long enough to loosen up. If Gerard had known him several years ago, he'd have plied Bob with alcohol, but since Gerard didn't drink anymore and Bob wouldn't drink around him, Gerard would have to use other methods.

Gerard was usually pretty bad at seduction, but when he was dressed up, he felt like a different person. So he used that confidence and boldness to slide his hands around Bob's hips and urge him to move. When Bob started to move a little less stiffly, Gerard slid one hand up Bob's back, brushing his fingertips teasingly across the back of Bob's neck before burying them in his hair.

Bob dropped his head onto Gerard's shoulder and pressed his face against Gerard's neck. A second or two later, his hips took the beat away from Gerard, making Gerard laugh and sing along into Bob's ear. Bob shuddered and clenched his hands around Gerard's waist even harder. When the song was over, they looked at each other in silent agreement and left the dance floor, heading straight for the doors.

After they stepped into the relatively cooler air outside, Gerard shivered and swiped at his damp neck with one hand while clinging to Bob with the other. "Let me," said Bob, low and rough, as he pushed Gerard's hand away and licked the sweat off his neck. Heat flashed through him and Gerard couldn't hold back his groan. Bob did it again, pressing his teeth lightly just behind Gerard's ear, and said in an almost-whisper, "I really want to fuck you right now."

"Yeah. Yes, please, anywhere--" Bob cut off Gerard's babble with his tongue sliding over Gerard's bottom lip, and Gerard was glad because he was seconds away from offering to do it right here on the street. He latched on to Bob's lip ring with his teeth and tugged once before sucking it between his lips.

A group walking by on their way to the club laughed and whistled and called out, "Get a room!"

Bob pulled away with a quiet noise somewhere between a grunt and a groan and said, "Yeah, let's do that."

The drive home should have taken about twenty minutes at that time of night, but it seemed to be taking about six hours so far and they weren't even half-way there yet. Bob kept looking over at Gerard and opening his mouth like he was going to say something, but then he'd close it again and grip the steering wheel just a little tighter, staring hard through the windshield. Eventually it got to be too much for Gerard, so when Bob glanced at him again, he said, "What?"

"I just...damn it." And with that, he flipped on his blinker and pulled off onto a quiet side street, and then he parked under a big tree that blocked the street lights. After a quick glance around to make sure they were alone, Bob snapped off his seat belt and reached for Gerard. He leaned across the console and drew him into a deep kiss without even bothering to release Gerard's seat belt. Feeling trapped and frantic to get closer to Bob, Gerard hooked one hand around Bob's neck and blindly grappled for the release button with the other. The seat belt came free and clipped Bob underneath the chin. He pulled back just long enough to say "ow" and let the seat belt finish retracting. Then he dived right back in, kissing Gerard soft then deep and then slick and dirty, pausing to occasionally whisper words against Gerard's mouth that weren't always understandable but Gerard got the gist anyway.

Shoving his skirt up and arching his hips, he struggled to get his pink boxer briefs off without actually stopping the kissing and the random groping. When he got them tangled around the tops of his boots, he abandoned them and reached for the plain white cotton panties he had on underneath them to keep his dick from being too noticeable under his skirt.

Bob drew back to see what Gerard was doing, then made a choked noise and pushed Gerard's hands away. "Fuck. Fuck, Gee. Let me. Can I?"

"Um, yeah. Yeah, whatever you wanna--" Gerard broke off and braced one hand on the car door and one hand on Bob's shoulder so he could lift his hips higher off the seat. Bob slid his fingers around the inside of the elastic, rough fingertips sweeping across the skin of Gerard's hip and belly before lifting the panties away from his hard cock, careful not to catch the waistband on the head as he eased them down to tangle with the boxer briefs at his knees. Gerard thought he might come before Bob had even done anything else. Just, the look on Bob's face...arousal and concentration and like it was the most fascinating thing he'd ever seen. Gerard felt ridiculously glad to have put that look on Bob's face, but he was too turned on to show it. "Bob, please, fuck...just touch me."

Bob cast a quick glance at Gerard's face and then bent down, wrapping one hand around Gerard's cock and giving it a few slow strokes before bending lower--Gerard had a brief thought for how uncomfortable that must be for Bob but then Bob closed his mouth over the tip of Gerard's cock and all thought flew right out of his head. His hips jerked, instinctively trying to get more of his cock into Bob's mouth and down his throat. But Bob clamped his free hand on Gerard's thigh and held him still while he worked his tongue against the head and slowly sucked his cock in deeper, the teasing bastard. "Fuck, Bob, please."

Bob glanced up out of the corner of his eye and Gerard could almost hear him thinking "Later". But he sucked harder and Gerard shuddered with how hot wet so fucking good Bob's mouth felt and his hands--oh fuck, his hands, big and strong, gripping Gerard's thigh and rhythmically squeezing the base of his cock. Gerard groaned and finally managed to let go of the death grip he had on the door and cupped his hand around the side of Bob's face. He could feel the muscles in Bob's jaw working under his fingers and his thumb brushed the corner of Bob's mouth, all wet and stretched tight and he couldn't hold off any more. "Bob, Bob--"

But Bob didn't pull off and Gerard was coming and Bob was swallowing around his cock and holy fuck. Lights flashed behind his closed eyes and Gerard gasped and opened them, just in time to see a car drive by. "Stay down for a second," he muttered as Bob started to raise his head. When the car reached the corner and turned, Gerard said, "Okay, it's gone."

Bob sat up, rolled his shoulders, and wiped his mouth on his sleeve, and then he just looked at Gerard for a long moment with a soft little smile. Gerard smiled back and said, "umm...thank you."

"You're welcome." Snickering and shaking his head, Bob started the car and checked his mirrors carefully before pulling back out onto the street.

"I just...I could have waited until we got home," Gerard said, as he pulled the panties back up and then shoved the boxer briefs all the way off, while Bob found a place to turn around so they could get back to the main road.

"I couldn't," Bob said as they passed under a street light and Gerard could see that soft smile back on Bob's face.

"You are still going to fuck me later, right?" Gerard asked in a very serious tone of voice, even though it was hard holding back the laugh that wanted to bubble up from his chest.

"Yes, I am," Bob said slowly and firmly as if speaking to a small child or an idiot.

"Just making sure," said Gerard, and then he did laugh.


Bob was trying to take his shirt off while shutting the door to keep the dog out, but Gerard kept getting in the way, sliding his hands under Bob's shirt, pulling at his belt buckle, leaning in to kiss him, pushing his thigh between Bob's legs, all at the same time, or near enough. Finally, Bob leaned back against the closed door, held his hands out to the side, and said, "Okay, I give up. You do it."

Gerard looked up from where he was unbuttoning Bob's jeans, licked his lips, and said, "Awesome."

Bob let Gerard undress him, only helping when Gerard told him to lift a foot or move an arm this way or that, and then he put his hands on Gerard's hips and walked him backward toward the bed. Gerard coordinated his steps with Bob so well it was almost like they were slow dancing. Bob watched Gerard move, his tips of hair brushing against his shoulders and curling around his ears, the quiet swish of his skirt around his thighs, the flick of his tongue across lips now bare of gloss but swollen and red from kissing, and felt a burst of possessiveness. For just a split-second, his mind went blank except for the words mine, mine, he's all mine. His stomach flipped and clenched, and he shook his head because that wasn't like him. It wasn't like him to want to beat some stranger bloody for touching what was his--for touching Gerard--but that was what had briefly gone through his mind at the club. He suspected that Gerard wouldn't appreciate it, but Bob couldn't bring himself to actually vocalize the thought and find out.

As if he could read Bob's mind, Gerard spread his hands across Bob's chest and kissed him lightly and said, "I don't usually...that, at the club, that was really hot how you defended me."

"You didn't need it," Bob murmured against Gerard's mouth. Gerard's skirt brushed against his bare cock and it was making it hard to form words and sentences, but Bob forced himself to focus long enough to add, "You could have just kneed him in the balls if he kept pushing."

"Yeah and I would've. When you showed up, I was about five seconds away from breaking his toes with the heel of my boot. But it was still hot." Gerard grinned and then reached down for his boots.

"Leave 'em," Bob said and grabbed a condom off the nightstand. He pressed it into Gerard's hand. "Hang on to that for a minute, okay?"

Gerard nodded and his eyes went wide when Bob dropped to his knees and pulled Gerard's skirt up and brought Gerard's other hand around to hold it up. The outline of his hardening cock through the thin cotton of those panties was still an amazing sight, and Bob marveled at the ridiculous number of new fetishes he was acquiring with Gerard. He wondered what was next and shuddered. Gerard made an impatient noise and Bob got back to the task at hand, slowly peeling the panties off and working them down Gerard's legs and off over the boots. He leaned in and licked Gerard's cock then pulled the skirt down so that it covered him, but tented over his erection, making it more obscene than just being naked.

Bob dragged his gaze away from the lewd display and up to Gerard's face and asked, "Will you keep the rest of the outfit on?"

"If..." Gerard cleared his throat and tried again. "If that's what you want. Yeah."

"Just this once," Bob said contemplatively, running his hands up Gerard's leather clad ankles and calves. His fingers shook as they skimmed over the shiny little buckles ranged up the sides of the boots. "That's what I want."

" do you want me?" Gerard's little white teeth sunk into his bottom lip and his eyes seemed huge in his face.

Bob was tempted to say 'everywhere, every way, all the fucking time' but knew that wouldn't be helpful. Instead, stretched out a hand to snag the lube off the nightstand, and lifted the skirt back up baring one of Gerard's thighs. His firm white thighs, clean shaven all the way up to his groin. Bob was still surprised he'd done that instead of just wearing tights or whatever, but maybe Gerard had figured that if he had to do his pits he might as well do his legs too. Or maybe he'd somehow known what the sight of all that smooth soft skin would do to Bob. Which was a fucking miracle since Bob had had no idea he'd find this as hot as he did. He dragged his open mouth up Gerard's thigh, feeling Gerard tremble against his tongue.

Gerard made a helpless whimpering sound and Bob smiled against his skin, flipping the lube open with one hand while he urged Gerard to widen his stance with the other. When Gerard had his legs spread open enough, Bob covered his fingers with lube and worked them inside Gerard, opening him up quickly and a little more roughly than usual. He glanced up and said, "You all right?"

"Yeah, yeah, fuck," Gerard said with a gasp and a shudder. "I'm ready."

"No, you're not. It's been too long." Gerard's fingers dug into Bob's shoulders, but Bob just kept stretching him, enjoying the feel of Gerard's body slowly opening to him and the choked little sounds that escaped Gerard's mouth.

"Well, it wouldn't have been, if someone hadn't been so selfish lately," Gerard said, probably trying to sound sassy but mostly sounding breathless and eager.

"Didn't hear you complaining when you were fucking me," Bob said, gently biting Gerard's thigh.

"Well, no, who would? You're so--uh--mmnn..." Gerard seemed to give up on trying to form words at that point because he just groaned and tugged on Bob's shoulders.

"So impatient," Bob breathed against Gerard's cock and twisted his fingers deep inside him. Gerard's hips snapped forward and his cock smacked into Bob's mouth, hard enough to be a little painful and surprisingly hot. Gerard froze and Bob shuddered and groaned. "Okay, okay, back up a step."

Bob pulled his fingers free as Gerard stepped back, then got to his feet and nodded to the condom still clutched in Gerard's hand. Gerard ripped open the package with his teeth and rolled it onto Bob's erection, then Bob slicked a handful of lube onto his cock and stroked some more into Gerard.

With another fast, messy kiss to Gerard's open mouth, Bob turned him around and bent him over the foot of the bed. With his black leather clad legs giving way to smooth thighs and naked ass, silvery dress pooled around the top of his hips and then the bare stretch of his back up to his tousled black hair, Gerard was the hottest thing that Bob had ever laid eyes on. He wished he had a camera because he needed to revisit this image for the rest of his life. Gerard arched his back and shoved his hips back and said, "Come on, Bob, fuck me already."

Bob clamped one hand around Gerard's hip to hold him still while he used the other to guide himself inside. He thrust deep and held still for a moment--fuck, Gerard was so tight. It really had been too long since Bob'd last fucked him. His eyes locked on the way Gerard's hands were violently twisting the bedspread. "Okay?"

"Yes," Gerard snapped and flailed a hand back toward Bob like he was trying to hit him but couldn't coordinate his movements well enough to connect. If Bob hadn't been about to spontaneously combust, he would have laughed. "Now fucking move, damn it."

"Bossy," Bob said a little breathlessly, and then gave up on talking altogether. If Gerard had any problems he'd say so. Bob set up a nice easy rhythm, snapping his hips a little harder every third thrust or so, just for the sounds that Gerard made. When he felt his orgasm approaching, he stilled and leaned forward to press his face against Gerard's back, dropping kisses on his warm sweaty skin and sliding his tongue along his spine.

Gerard lifted his hips and Bob could feel him working a hand underneath his body to get at his cock, so he started thrusting again, hard and fast and almost out of control. But it was hot and tight and perfect and he was coming almost before he was ready. He gasped out Gerard's name and shoved in one last time, holding still as intense pleasure rolled through him, leaving him shaken and drained.

Bob took a moment to catch his breath and then carefully pulled out so that Gerard could raise up and get a good rhythm going. Bob wrapped his hand around Gerard's cock, tangling their fingers together and that's all it took for Gerard to keen low in the back of his throat and come all over their fingers and the bedspread. Bob collapsed on the bed next to Gerard and they just stared at each other for a long while, smiling tiredly, until they could gather the energy to get cleaned up.


Gerard came out of the bathroom in a clean t-shirt and pajama pants, with his face washed free of makeup and his teeth brushed using the toiletries he'd been leaving at Bob's apartment for a while now. More and more of his clothes had found their way into Bob's closet and drawers, and he found himself wondering if or when Bob was going to say something. Tell him to stop leaving so much of his shit at Bob's place.

Bob had stripped the bedspread off and wadded it up in the corner of the room, and now he was propped up against his pillow with the sheet and blanket pulled up to his waist. He'd put on sleep pants but not a shirt, so when Gerard climbed in next to him he immediately laid his head on Bob's bare chest, snuggling in and pressing his ear against his heart beat. Bob's arm went around his back and Bob raised his other hand to brush Gerard's hair off his face. His fingertips lingered on Gerard's cheek before falling away.

Gerard closed his eyes and sighed in utter contentment until Bob cleared his throat and said, "This might not be the best time to bring this up." The contentment flowed out and worry took its place.

"What?" Gerard sat up so he could face Bob, and his heart pounded in his chest. "What is it? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I've just been thinking." Bob sat up straighter and looked down at his hands clenched together in his lap. "You know I love you, right?"

"But?" Gerard asked a little more impatiently than he meant to.

Bob looked confused. "What?"

"There's usually a 'but' after a statement like that. Just spit it out." Gerard steeled himself for the inevitable rejection and breakup that was certainly coming. He should have known things were going too well. None of his relationships had ever lasted this long. It had just taken Bob longer to get sick of him, and he kind of felt pathetically grateful for that. The last eight months had been some of the best of his life, and a lot of that had to do with Bob. He was supportive and easy to get along with, strong in the ways that Gerard sometimes wasn't. Even his weaknesses fit Gerard's strengths, so that Gerard had started to feel that they'd been made for each other. He should have known he couldn't possibly be that lucky.

"So, um, you know I've got really good benefits through my job, right? Like insurance and stuff." Bob looked at Gerard expectantly, but Gerard was having a bit of trouble catching up with the conversational shift.

"Yeah, I guess... what?" Gerard stared at Bob and noticed the tips of his ears turning pink. Even as his panicked disappointment was subsumed by his confusion, he couldn't help finding that too cute for words.

"Well. Okay. It's just, I can get domestic partner coverage, and you said that you were only staying at the drugstore for the benefits, and you've been making more and more money from your art lately, so, I thought..."

Gerard suddenly got the picture that Bob was so inexpertly trying to draw. "What the actual fuck, Bob? Are you trying to ask me to move in with you?" Bob nodded gratefully and Gerard poked him in the side and thought about punching him too. "Using insurance as a selling point? You motherfucking asshole, I thought you were gonna break up with me or something."

"What? Why? After tonight, you thought I was dumping you?" Now it was Bob's turn to poke him in the belly, but Bob found a ticklish spot and Gerard wiggled away, not wanting to be distracted from the point at hand.

"So did I guess right? You have to say it."

"Gerard." Bob sighed and put his arms around him. "Do you want to move in with me and be my official domestic partner so you can quit your crappy retail job and focus on your art full time?"

"Yeah, I guess. I mean, you make it sound so appealing and all." Gerard tried to sound all casual and offhand about it, but his relief was so great that he was grinning like an idiot.

"You seriously thought I was going to break up with you?" Bob shook his head and waved a hand that encompassed them, the bed, and the dress currently draped over the chair in the corner. "Were you here for any of that? Some of the best sex ever? I do all kinds of kinky shit for you--or because of you--and it's amazing, so no, I'm not fucking breaking up with you."

"I have issues, okay. You knew that, so don't take it too personally." Reality caught up with Gerard and suddenly the import of moving in with Bob, of officially committing, hit him and it didn't seem so funny anymore. "I have issues. You have to understand what that means for you--for us."

"I do. I think so anyway. I mean, we've been together long enough for stuff to come up and...I'll do whatever you need me to do or not do. Whatever." Bob pressed a kiss to Gerard's lips and then tilted his forehead against Gerard's. "I am very, very serious about this. But only if you want to."

Gerard pushed Bob over and climbed on top of him, dropping kisses all over Bob's face. "Fuck yeah, I want to. I love you, you stupid motherfucker."

"Oh. Well, good." Bob slid his hands up and down Gerard's back and caught his mouth in a deep kiss that left them both a little breathless and unfocused. "Because, you know, that thing I said earlier."

"You love me," Gerard murmured against Bob's cheek, rubbing his lips against Bob's beard until they tingled.

"Yeah, that." Bob wrapped his arms around Gerard and held on tight.