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Painkillers

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Dave: Begin adventure.

 

After the first two weeks of general confusion and awkwardness, and the first two months near some blue annoying hag the other trolls refer to as Vriska Serket, the meteor trip started to resemble a decent if fairly boring journey, you think.

 

Oh wait, wasn't she John's patron troll? You can't say you kept track of his situation too much that day, since you were far too busy being up to your neck in mind games and dead Daves and shit. But you're pretty sure your guess is spot on.

 

 

How the fuck did he even manage to talk to her in the first place, anyway.

 

Yeah, whatever, who are you even kidding with “two months”, you're still not over how much of a pain the ass she is.

 

==>

 

Ok, there was too much Vriska in the last paragraphs for your liking.

 

Rewind. Let's make a comprehensive list of the fuck-up fest of people inhabiting the same huge shitty piece of space rock first. Or spookyendlessinferno rock. Whatever.

 

==>

 

First, your sister. Yeah ok, you guess you don't have much to say about her actually. You already know how she is.

 

You didn't expect her to be a messy kind of person, though.

You find her needles everywhere you look and sit, you swear. Wherever you go, they're always there, being vaguely unsettling and poking your ass. You're lucky the magic ones only work when she holds them, you think. And shudder.

She even uses them as bookmarks sometimes, what the fuck? Why does she even have so many of the things. You do get the books, but why the needles too.

And the yarn. Goddammit, the yarn. You think she made a pile of yarn somewhere. 'Cause it's not like you people sleep in regular, soft horizontal planes in this new adult-less little dark world, hell NO, you dig piles of random crap for your slumbers, mostly uncomfortable, pretty much in random places, very messy, very weird, very fuck you kinda miss your bed.

You're not gonna lie, you slept on the floor more than one time rather than using your pile of smuppets. Actually, you know what, you think you're going to set it on fire next time. You mean, after you'll have alchemized something resembling a bed first.

 

(Why did you even make a smuppet pile in the first place)

(you guess you thought they were comfortable)

(or at least the only alchemizable soft shit that came up to your mind at the time)

(t'was either that or swords and posters how's that sound buddy)

 

You're suddenly aware you're capable of rambling even in your personal POV narration. Cool.

You should have captchalogued your bed before fleeing in the meteor, probably. But cool.

 

==>

 

Then there's Kanaya.

You don't know jack squat about Kanaya.

Honestly, you went there just by immediate association with Rose.

She sorta reminds you of her, which is maybe bad. Or nah, it's not. You're sure she's ok, you just have no idea how you could bond with such a... rigid... motherly... person? Yeah, you don't know jack squat about Kanaya.

 

The next person you immediately think about is Vriska. You pass.

 

For some reason you associate her with Gamzee. Let's see. Makes out with severed heads. Stalks people through vents. Probably keeps food in his hair.

 

He's bonkers. The end.

 

Ah, now there's why you associated he and Vriska.

 

==>

 

You're not sure you'll ever make up your mind about these last three trolls, but you sure know one thing or two about Terezi. You suppose.

Now that you think about it, you don't maybe.

You shared a few crappy comics and memes and talked with each other heartily one time. It was all you needed to think you had something special. That you were a little more than friends.

 

Let's be honest, it wasn't that much for something special yet, or enough knowledge about her in general.

 

First of all, you probably underestimated her thing with Vriska. You mean, you knew there was something there too, what with how much she talked about her. But you didn't expect her to ignore you consistently like this after the rendez-vous.

Wait, no, see, you just blew it up again. What a preposterous and melodrammatic exaggeration. The point is, she still does pretty much the same shit she used to do with you, and you GUESS you're good friends, but you don't feel like she's swooning all over you anymore. Not even ironically.

 

That's what you came to realise.

 

You weren't sad though. Just confused.

 

Like when you woke up some hours ago. And moved your lazy carcass out of the soon-to-be-on-fire smuppet pile to some corridor, all getting lost in the labs and what not, until you met Karkat. He looked at you funny and called you douchebag, then fucked off hastily.

Just now, you discovered you had been fucking around alone for a grand total of five and a half hours with a wonky Hella Jeff on your face. Someone whose name shall remain mysterious drew the stuff on you while you were sleeping.

It's kind of TOO wonky, actually. Mysterious Person missed your mouth entirely. A big horizontal “y” lies spread across your right cheek, its leg entering your left nostril.

 

Dave: Pester Terezi.

 

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC]

TG: tz
TG: god damn
TG: my mouth
TG: its like
TG: i dont know
TG: a fucking pork chop
TG: jegus
TG: i mean jesus
TG: so overwhelmed i cant even damn type
TG: ok honestly i dont think i can actually talk either with this thing
TG: its way too shitty and it tickles my nose
TG: you did it on purpose did you
TG: i talk too much isnt it
GC: TH4NK GOD YOUR3 CL3V3R 3NOUGH TO G3T 1T BY YOURS3LF
GC: 4ND TO US3 T3CHNOLOGY TO H4SSL3 M3 1NST34D
GC: GOOD JOB COOLK1D >:]
GC: NOW G3T YOUR 4SS OV3R H3R3 4ND F1ND 4 W4Y TO T4LK W1TH 4CTU4L P3OPL3 W1TH YOUR N3W FOUND ST1NKY TR4P
GC: INST34D OF SL33P1NG 1N GROSS LOOK1NG N4P P1L3S 4ND G3TT1NG LOST 1N PL4C3S
GC: SOM3TH1NG N33DS YOU H3R3
GC: 1T'S C4LL3D C4N TOWN >;]

 

==>

 

Your face is still intact, pokerways. Your heart liften up a bit. Yeah, she's still your friend at least.

Not that you really needed a confirmation. That would probably be needy of you.

 

What the fuck is Can Town, anyway.

 

You write this down to her and make another typo.