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Adventures of Awkward Steve

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Steve came in early one morning from patrol duty and really just wanted to go to bed. He hated all-night patrol duty, but somebody had to do it. That's what he told himself as he slumped against the elevator wall and closed his eyes. Maybe no one would notice if he just slept here. The elevator stopped on the second floor and someone else got in. Steve attempted to ignore them, but they left a lingering minty, flowery smell in the air and Steve knew he had smelled it somewhere before...he opened his eyes and then screwed them shut again.

Loki chuckled softly. Steve tried to squeeze himself closer into the corner of the elevator.

"Long night?" Loki asked. Steve grunted in reply.

"Hmm," agreed Loki.

A few seconds passed in silence, and then Loki spoke again.

"Not much for conversation?"

Steve opened his eyes again and glared at his elevator companion.

"You tattooed a unicorn on my stomach."

"God of Mischief," Loki said. "Vandalism kind of comes with the job description."

"And it didn't come off for a week - "

"- But it did come off."

"...Yes."

"Well then."

A few more seconds of silence went by. Steve jiggled the floor number button and huffed in impatience.

"Look," Loki started, but Steve cut him off.

"I don't care whose brother you are," he said, moving into Loki's space, "I don't care what you've sworn to or off of or whatever, I think you're bad news and I don't like that you're living here and I don't have to be your friend. Am I clear?"

Loki stared straight into Steve's eyes and for a moment Steve thought he looked nervous, but it passed and Loki smirked slightly.

"Perfectly," he said.

"Good," Steve said, and turned towards the door. The elevator dinged their arrival.

"I mean," Loki said, leaning slightly towards Steve, "It's good to know Captain America's watching his own back." He smacked Steve on the behind, and then stepped past him into the living room.

Natasha walked past and stopped when she saw Steve's gawping face.

"Long night?" she asked.

Steve blinked. "And an even longer morning," he said.