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Guilt

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The memory didn’t flash before him as though it was triggered by something specific. 

He could be doing anything and it would creep in like the shadows lurking in his eyes. It’d sworn that he would never forget— the weight of Charles’ body, strangely light and heavy at the same time, the pain in those blue eyes and the words Charles had spoken, the uneasy truth piercing Erik’s heart and damning him to silence it forever. 

To this day, he didn’t know how he and Charles could still meet and play chess as though nothing had changed them at all.