Thor never fails to confuse Loki and he believed he was the one who always strived to cause confusion and chaos. but evidently he is mistaken. No matter how hard he tries to push him away Thor never stops trying to get his brother back.
But that can never be, he is not Odin's son. Never has been and can never hope to compare to the mighty Thor. The true heir. But it's times like this when his brother is crouched before him; those bright blue eyes wet with unshed tears and fingers trembling that Loki forgets. He wonders what kind of magic Thor must wield to make his sentiment affect him so.
He is returned to Asgard kept under lock and key; hands and voice eternally bound for they know what mischief he can create using only his tongue. He had expected a much worse punishment from his fath…Odin; something for which he suspects Thor had played a part in. It is at times like this when he is sat in this dark, lifeless room he feels that the path he chose was the only one he could have taken. An outcast of bad blood, of ice and chaos, took the only road he could see. The only path he had any right to tread. He does not feel regret or sorrow; that is until Thor arrives. As he always does.
He comes and sits with Loki; talking of times when they used to play as children, when they fought together and stood by each other's side as equals. It is always so bittersweet to him. Those memories are indeed precious to him; although he will never admit. Those were times in his life where he was weightless and without the burdens of things such as jealousy and anger. Where he truly loved Thor, admired him even, a time where he did not mind looking up to his big brother. It was only as he grew older that he began to see the vast differences between himself and his brother. The way his father always smiled that little wider at Thor's achievements, the way he held him just that little bit tighter and how sometimes he would catch his parents watching him as if they could sense the darkness within his soul.
Thor, however, never looked at him like that. His smiles were always widest for Loki, embraces the biggest and longest and his looks held nothing but love and pride. And Loki despised him for it. He despised his purity, his complete faith and pride in his brother that to his parents was so clearly inferior. He hated the way how Thor could not see how they were compared at every turn. How Loki was left to wilt in his brother's shadow; pale and breaking. Thor never saw his pain. He only saw his own power and glory. And when had discovered his true heritage; that the coldness in his heart was innate and that he and his brother truly were nothing alike every meaning of the word. He broke.
And everything he had tried to regain; a purpose, power; meaning. Was all for naught. He sits here in his gloomy cell waiting for nothing except the inevitable arrival of his brother. Thor strides in punctual as ever, his body tense in anticipation and takes his space opposite Loki. He stares at his brother with the same eyes he had as a child. Loving and hopeful but now somehow clouded with sorrow.
"Loki…brother. I miss you. Please, come back to us." He whispers; his voice broken and desperate. Every time he sees Thor like this; regret floods his system like a poison. To see his brother in so much pain. To know that his agony is mirrored so vividly in Thor; is almost too much to bear. Thor gently reaches out and tentatively places a hand on his brother's cheek. Tears are now freely running down his face mingling with his light beard. Loki tracks them unable to look away trying in vain ignoring the warmth of Thor's palm against his cheek and how much it comforts him. How much he needs that warmth. You sentimental fool, he cries out in his head, just leave. Leave! But Thor stays as he always does; looking at his brother intently. Loki feels a calloused thumb sweep across his check spreading wetness down the side of his face and realises that he is crying as well.
Thor speaks again; voice soft and full of purpose. "I am sorry that I never saw your pain. I was blinded by my own power...If I had just paid more attention, if I had seen...then perhaps…" he trails off clearly unable to finish the sentence; his voice low and broken.
"I know you think me sentimental. But I will always love you, Loki. Regardless of what you do. Do not ever forget that." he stresses willing Loki to believe him with every fibre of his being. He leans forward using his hand to pull Loki forward and places a soft kiss on his forehead. He tries to convey everything that he is feeling now and everything he feels for his brother into that kiss. He can feel Loki tremble and gently strokes one hand through his silky black hair. He prays that Loki is willing to let go of his pride. That he is willing to come home where they wait. Where they will always wait. He pulls away and begins to tell him of his day unable to keep his feelings bare for too long.
And this is what Loki hates the most. That he is hanging onto every word that spews forth from Thor's mouth; most of which is trivial and boring. But he could not care less. Thor's loving words and gentle touches burn him; warming his cold heart. He doesn't deserve them. Not after everything that has happened between them. Not after everything he has done. Yet, Thor still comes everyday trying to heal his brother with his love and his kindness; the kind that only family can give. And no matter how much he wants to hate it; to hate Thor. He prays that Thor will never stop trying. So that perhaps one day he can try as well.