Chapter Text
He wakes up to the sound of what he can only guess is Thor tripping over his own two feet. Trying to will himself back into unconsiousness on the first day of summer he closes him eyes and attempts to remember what transpired last night. He remembers searching for Tony, finding him and letting the man drag him away from the crowd and into the dark hallway. Remembers their strange first real conversation and the hug that Loki felt he needed to give. If he focuses really hard he can still feel Tony's lips lightly on his nose and eventually on his lips. It was his first real kiss.
He can't help but smile at himself when he remembers how Tony had inadvertantly told Loki that he cared about him to some degree and how Loki had said the same. It was strange, foreign, completely unnatural for Loki to just give in to his emotions. He still couldn't fathom why he felt so tempted to take Tony apart and build him back up again, to watch his every move, every breath, to stay by his side and not let anything take him away. Maybe he was finally loosing the little sense he had left.
Or maybe it wasn't as complicated as all that. Maybe Loki was just waiting to be happy, waiting for someone who he trusts and who seems to trust back. He never thought he would be feeling this pull to Tony Stark, however, and that point still confused him. Maybe it was the way his whole face would light up when he smiled, or how you could tell instantly if something was wrong just by the way his eyes would wander and focus on random things. Loki hadn't noticed until now that he knew these things about Tony and he never knew when he learned them all.
Instantly there's another feeling that washes over him. He supposes it could be described as giddiness or ecstacy, but he can only describe it as happiness. Everything is so pure and wonderful and it scares him so much because he's never used to being happy. He doesn't know if things with Tony will continue, if what happened was just misplaced emotions running on high, but he doesn't believe for a second that that's true.
He wants to call Tony and ask him. Ask him if this is going to go further but he can't will himself to. It's giddy, teenage infatuation and Loki doesn't want to be subjected to it but he finds that he slowly is.
He doesn't want to think about falling for Tony Stark, and he definietly doesn't want to think about the chance of Tony Stark falling for him, but he does and he relishes it. Invites it. Craves it even because it's what he wants, and he never gets what he wants.
He hears his door open and is happy that his eyes ar closed so that whoever entered - Thor, he's guessing - thinks he's asleep and leaves. He smiles again and wonders if this is what everyone means when they say they're happy.