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“I could have done it, Father! I could have done it! For you! For all of us!”
Silvertongue they used to call him. Not exactly the right name for a Prince of golden Asgard, the home of great warriors and heroes. Of course he was actually a tool taken from Jotunheim so perhaps that’s no surprise.
Now, it seems a misnomer. Even he cannot create a phrase to convince his father of the rightness of the actions. Not while Thor is there as the golden alternative and true son.
Even though he had seen the blue creep over his skin and had Odin himself say he was no Odinson Loki had thought he could prove otherwise, destroy this Jotun taint. He had been raised in Asgard, surely that counted for something. With Laufey gone and all chances of attack from Jotunheim forever prevented surely even Loki ,with the detested blood of Frost Giants, flowing through his veins could be proved a true son of Asgard and of Odin.
Thor had killed many frost giants, Loki was trying to kill them all. His brother had espoused this as the right idea so many times in their youth that Loki still doesn’t really understand why he has a problem with it now.
Thor is Aesir though. Thor is perfect. What Thor thinks must be right even if it only takes three days for him to change his entire life philosophy.
Despite all this, or maybe because of it, Loki is actually glad he didn’t kill Thor.
When they come Odin’s word are no surprise
“No, Loki”
The truth is Loki will never be Aesir, never be Thor’s equal, never be a true Odinson.
Loki lets go.
...
Loki isn’t sure what to expect when he puts on the Sorting Hat. Thor had been unsurprisingly unforthcoming about what it was like being Sorted and all the books Loki had read about the about the Sorting Hat seemed to focus on its history. No one seemed to know how the founder’s enchantment actually worked and no one seemed to feel the need to actually describe being sorted.
The latter admittedly was probably due to the fact few wizards or witches read such books before being sorted.
“Well, you’re certainly hungry for knowledge, thirsty for recognition too, one often gets that in younger children from old families. Impressive about of talent too. Not one to face things head on though. Nothing like your brother”
Loki has a nasty feeling he knows where this is going. Ravenclaw is ok though, he can cope with Ravenclaw. The Asagrim’s have been Gryffindors for generations but his mother had called him in to talk in private before he’d set off for Hogwarts and told him he didn’t have to be a Gryffindor. Loki would pass this off as simple motherly reassurance if it wasn’t for the fact his mother is quite the talented seer, even if she isn’t quite as keen on sharing her visions as the Ministry would like her to be. He’d spent most of the train journey accepting he’d never be Gryffindor.
“Not set on Gryffindor then?” said the voice “Well, that’s good, that wouldn’t have suited you at all. Best you be SLYTHERIN”
Somehow Loki heard the hat shout the last word to the entire hall. How he reached the Slytherin table Loki still dosen’t know. All he could see the whole way to the table was the expression on his brother’s face. Thor would never ever accept him after this. His father would never accept him. His mother might but Loki still feels betrayed that she let him go to Hogwarts if she knew this was coming. Better the awkwardness of Beauxbatons or even Durmstrang than being a Slytherin in Hogwarts.
Loki had been prepared for Ravenclaw. He hadn’t even considered Slytherin as an option. No one from their family has ever been in Slytherin. Slytherin is a house of dark wizards, liars and cowards.
He’s never going to be able to look his family in the face again.
“Are you ok?” the redhead sitting next to him says.
Loki dosen’t answers her.
...
Loki scowls as he watches Thor in the courtyard. His brother is already proving to be quite the impressive firebender. Despite the fact that Thor isn’t really much more advanced than any other child their age, he’s already heard the whispers going around that perhaps his brother will be the next member of the Royal Family to generate lightening. He certainly has clarity of mind enough, if by clarity you mean being single-minded enough that he can only focus on one thing at a time and won’t question anything he’s told.
Loki on the other hand seems to be heading for the distinction of being the only non-bender ever in the history of the Fire Nation Royal Family. No matter what he does fire just does not respond to him. He’s tried to focus and gone through all the movements but he never gets any response. It had started showing when they were younger and he hadn’t had any of the untrained responses to fire most firebenders did. His parents had always laughed it off as Loki being a cautious child but by now it’s quite clear he will never be able to firebend.
It really is a good thing his parents have Thor because no non-bender could ever be Fire Lord, even if they were at peace.
Loki’s newest plan to prove himself is to try the arts of the other bending disciplines. He won’t be able to do anything of course, he’s not the Avatar, but hopefully they should feel different to when he attempts Firebending and perhaps if he works out where that difference comes from he can manage to Firebend.
The problem is the water wasn’t supposed to respond. He’d got a bowl of water and done as Angrbroda, one of the prisoners from the Southern Water Tribe who Loki wasn’t really supposed to talk to, had described and well, that was the problem really. He had done as she described. He, Loki, son of Fire Lord Odin had waterbended.
Which meant he could not be his son. It was impossible for the child of two firebenders to waterbend. He’d never ever be able to be prove his worth in the family because he wasn’t part of the family.
...
Loki used to be normal. Honestly. OK, maybe not quite normal, not normal in same interests to everyone else way like Thor but he’d been weird in the normal way. The too quiet, too clever, interested in reading not sports way, as if he was some stock character in a high school tv show. Of course, this stuff, had only started when he started high school and seriously Loki has no idea where it comes from.
Admittedly he’d always never really got cold the way other kids did and sometimes when he woke up and looked in the mirror his eyes looked red but they were always green whenever he looked again. They accidentally freezing things is definitely a new and unwelcome development. It doesn’t even make scientific sense, there’s no way a human can just magically freeze things and it’s not as if it’s even possible to radiate cold.
The whole skin-turning-blue and eyes-turning-red when he has an incident is even worse (and makes even less sense) at least he can attempt to hide the fact something has inexplicitly turned into an icicle. Blue skin is a bit harder to hide.
His family say they still love him but Loki saw the fear in their eyes that time he accidentally gave Thor frostbite.
He knows they will send him away with the brown-haired man in the wheelchair. This Charles Xavier says that he runs a school for children like Loki, Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, because apparently there are other people with abilities like these, and seriously, secret schools and superpowers, how is this his life?
Not that Loki isn’t going to go of his own volition. He isn’t stupid. He know he needs training or someone’s going to get hurt and at this place maybe he’ll finally be able to fit in.
Besides he can’t put the strain on his family by staying. Not when Loki apparently isn’t even Homo Sapiens because seriously, how can he pretend to be part of this family when he isn’t even human?
...
Perhaps Loki had been a little disrespectful but after all he claimed to be cool not wise. Besides he was hardly going to try to explain the wonders of a Starkphone to one to whom it was so clearly beyond his ken.
Of course most of Asgard probably wouldn’t really understand the uses of a Starkphone, nearly all would definitely not want one. While Loki is most certainly not as evil as they think it is clear his interests and talents lie somewhere rather different to those of the rest of Asgard.
It is not simply his heritage. Being Loki Laufeyson does not explain his interest in the internet for example. It is most helpful for learning about Midgard and truly he does not understand why so many of the Aesir view change and progress with distrust.
Even Thor who has for so many years been champion of Midgard and comrade-in-arms with Tony Stark prefers to use mortal technology only when he must. He would much prefer to be smiting Fire-Giants than edging his way round the more complicated politics and technology of Midgard.
Loki himself is rather less smitingy, at least nowadays.
Still, he understands with his past why Asgard is so unpleased by his presence. The Warriors Three may have sworn to his brother to protect him but that is out of loyalty to his brother, not himself. Indeed, their emotions towards him most probably lie in the opposite direction.
None of it really matters though.
Loki has Thor.
Thor, who found Serrure on the streets of Paris and brought Loki back, despite all he may have done. Thor, who protects him from Asgard and allows him his Starkphone (even if he doesn’t approve).
Loki doesn’t understand Thor. He doesn’t even really understand how the thunder god feels towards Loki. He knows he must disappoint his brother (and more rarely make him feel pound) and confuse him.
He does know one thing about the mystery of Thor though.
Thor loves Loki as his brother despite his past actions and his differences and the lack of blood relation.
And in the end that’s all that really matters.