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  1. Tags
    Summary

    The entire room is openly gawking at him - well, Tony's grinning like a maniac and Natasha's face is emptiness personified. Fury just looks assessing. And he knows, he knows the response is disproportionate and he sucks down his temper as best he can, but he's feeling absolutely at his ends. There's more that needs to be dealt with in this conversation but he half expects his skin to start turning 'Banner green' at this rate, so he turns on his heel and locates the door, brandishing his teeth in a snarl of irritation to try and keep worse words from spilling forth - an effort that's destined to fail as his uniform shifts again at the change in orientation sending stabbing pain through him.

    "And who the fuck thought it would be a good idea to alter my uniform without telling me?" Steve demands of no-one in particular as he slams out of the conference room and down the Helicarrier's hallway without waiting for an answer.

    ...
    Or, that time S.H.I.E.L.D. quartermasters accidentally put Steve's balls in a vise and it goes exactly as well as you'd expect it to. Tony promptly offers to help. Because he's helpful like that. Obviously.

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