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Big City Rules

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Vimes: Now, I don't mind telling you, son, you're in a lot of trouble. I could do you for any number of things, not least shooting one of my men, so if we're going to have a conversation ...

Dean: Look, you're not going to believe, no matter what I say.

Vimes: Oh, you'd be surprised. Amazing what I'll believe, sometimes.

Dean: *sighs heavily* Alright, but don't say I didn't warn you ...

Vimes: *long, level look*

Dean: Okay. Your man, well, woman? She's ... a werewolf.

Vimes: *still looking*

Dean: I saw her transform. She's definitely a werewolf.

Vimes: Ye-es. And?

Dean: ... *stares*

Vimes: Half the bloody city knows about the werewolf in the Watch, kid! Granted, most of them think it's Nobby, but ... That the only reason you decided to take a pot shot at a member of the Watch? Because if it is ... *heavy pause*

Dean: *blinks* Wait, wait! You know about her? You know what she is?

Vimes: *stares at him some more, then puts on a kindlier face* This your first time in Ankh Morpork, kid? *jovial, resting a hand on Dean's shoulder*

Dean: Uh. Yes?

Vimes: Because we do things a little different here, I'm afraid. *looks him over* You'd be one of those hero-types, right? Hunting the bad things, saving random passers-by, that sort of thing?

Dean: *flushes a little* Well, yeah, if you want to put it that way ...

Vimes: Right. Well, here in the big city, lad ... we don't go in for that sort of thing much anymore. Now, I know, I understand the need to get rid of evil when you see it, but these days ... well, the vampires have always had good press, but the zombies and the werewolves are catching up, and the anti-discrimination lobbies are getting noisy, and all that aside you do not shoot at my watchmen in my city, no matter what species they might happen to be, do you understand me, my lad? *manic grin*

Dean: *stares* ... Yes? Sir?

Vimes: That's all right then. And don't go shooting any other citizens, either. Or we will have words, my lad, and they won't be near so friendly as we're being right now. Do we understand each other?

Dean: Yes, sir!

Vimes: Good lad. *pats shoulder*